High Stays The Tide
by capricapra
Summary: EPOV Companion piece to 'The Tide is High.' Edward Cullen. International corporate lawyer, serial monogamist, stress-head. Can he get over his issues to capture true love, or will he settle for the poor imitation? This story probably won't make sense unless you're reading 'The Tide is High' as well, so please give them both a try! Rated M for language/probable lemons.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Hello and welcome to **_**High Stays the Tide.**_** This is an EPOV companion piece to **_**The Tide is High**_** and probably won't make sense unless you're reading that too. **

**The chapters in **_**High Stays the Tide **_**are much shorter, and are generally written in the present tense. They're meant to be a sort of snapshot into Edward's mind. **

**As with my other stories, this one does not have a beta, so if you spot a spelling/grammar error that really bugs you, please drop me a line to let me know.**

**Thank you, dear readers, for all your support, and I hope you like hearing from Edward, even when there are times when he is a total idiot.**

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**Enjoy!**

**-cc-**

**One**

I walk into the Terrace Bar, ready for our Econ-geeks Boys' Night Out. Ben spots me and starts waving. Angela and her friend turn round and I nearly stop in my tracks. Angela's friend is...words can't describe how strikingly, stunningly beautiful she is. She has waist-length shiny chocolate brown hair and the most amazing ass perhaps ever. She looks me over with these huge, deep, chocolate brown eyes and I immediately feel a strange mixture of calm and nervous. She has flawless, creamy skin and a sweet, slightly pouty mouth which immediately makes me think of kissing her and more. I've never had such a visceral reaction to a girl before.

_Edward, you shit. You have a girlfriend. You are committed to Victoria. _

"Edward! Hey!" Ben shakes my hand.

"Hey Ben, how's things?" I ask, trying not to look at the stunner.

"Great thanks!"

"Angela, how are you?" I lean over the table and kiss her on the cheek. She's a lovely girl. She and Ben are so good together.

"Really good, especially now that Bella's here!" She turns to her friend. "Bella, meet Edward Cullen. Edward, this is my best friend Bella Swan. She's visiting from Cambridge."

"Cambridge huh?" I ask, trying to suppress my inner regrets. _Everything happens for a reason, including not going to Cambridge._ She nods and blushes, a wave of pink spreading over her exquisite face. It's so sexy. I start to shake her hand, but once her soft hand meets mine I can't help but turn it over and bring it to my lips. Her blush intensifies and my whole being feels like it's on fire. "Lovely to meet you Bella. Italian for 'beautiful.'" I smile at her. _Is that blush just for me or does she always do that? _"Well, it's a very fitting name!"

"Nice to meet you, Edward." She murmurs in a soft, warm voice. Bella turns away then and sips her wine. Fuck! I've probably embarrassed her by being so forward.

"So what do you boys have planned?" Angela asks.

I tell her about our plans for the night and she mentions that she is taking Bella to see a cabaret show in town. I wonder if it would be special enough for Victoria's birthday. She thought my efforts last year were 'generic.'

"So Edward, I was just telling Bella and Angela about how you're heading to London for law school in the autumn." Ben interrupts my thoughts. I can't help but grin.

"Oh, I cannot wait! I love Leeds but now that I've decided what I want to do with my life, I'm itching to get on with it!" I reply keenly. Bella leans forward a little.

"Which area of law are you interested in?" She asks, big eyes focussed on me. My breath catches in my throat.

"I'm not sure yet. I guess, with an economics background, that commercial law would be sensible. But they haven't asked me to choose a specialty for my Masters yet, so I've got time to decide."

"That's great." She smiles slightly, and it warms me to the bone.

"What about you Bella, what do you study at Cambridge? Are you a final-year as well?" I ask. There's something about her that's very intriguing. Those huge Bambi eyes widen and her cheeks pink up a little. She is freakin' adorable.

"Yes, I'm in my final year too. I'm reading Politics and International Relations at Emmanuel College."

My stomach twists. _She goes to Emmanuel? If I'd gone there I'd already know her..._

"Actually, Edward, Bella is going to City of London Law School in the autumn as well." Ben says. That is _very _good news.

"Seriously?" The rest of them nod.. "How great. It'll be nice to recognise someone on the first day!" I say. I start to hold out my hand to her again but direct it into a high-five, which she returns. She's relaxed a little.

"Likewise. Ben also mentioned that you have a training contract with Volturi, Denali and Ireland. I do too."

"Double cool!"

"Hello all!" Victoria is suddenly by my side. _What's she doing here?_

"Hello Darling!" I reply. I move to kiss her gently, but she grabs me and sticks her tongue down my throat, almost ferociously. What the hell? "Oof, what was that for?"

"I missed you!" She tells me. That's odd. She's not normally an 'I miss you' kind of girl.

"Missed you too! I thought you were going to your parents' tonight."

"Mummy's got the flu, and Daddy's decided to go shooting with his pals so there's no point!"

"So you're going to come out with us?" I ask. She looks towards Angela and then Bella, and suddenly I understand her PDA. She's staking her claim. I feel a surge of annoyance at her bitch-tastic behaviour. Neither Angela nor Bella have said or done anything to suggest they're interested in me.

"I thought you were going out with the boys?"

"He is. Bella and I are heading into town." Angela replies, obviously picking up on the reason for Vic's behaviour. "Bella, this is Edward's girlfriend, Victoria. Victoria, this is my best friend from school, Bella."

"Hi." She says, automatically, almost coldly. Something about Bella gets to her. _"_Would you mind if I borrowed Edward for just a minute?"

"Err, back soon!" I shout as she's pulling me away. "Vic, what did you do that for? That was a bit rude!"

"I missed you. Am I not allowed to miss my sexy boyfriend?" I suppress my annoyance and provide the correct answer.

"Of course." Victoria's expression softens. She leans in and I kiss her the way she wants to be kissed. However, in my head I'm seeing Bella's big brown Bambi-eyes.

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	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hi! So, how did you like the first chapter of EPOV? Please let me know!**

**Without further ado, here's the second. It might start to explain a bit more about why Edward is the way he is when it comes to girls. **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Two**

I'm exhausted. I'm dirty. I'm in agony from where Victoria punched me in the gut, and from spending four hours sitting in the station on a bench waiting for the first train back to London. I can't even nip into the loos to brush my teeth and change my t-shirt because when I walked out after Victoria punched me I left my bag there. Thankfully I have my wallet, keys and mobile with me, otherwise I'd have had to go back.

I should have broken up with her months ago. We were drifting apart before I graduated but believing it meant having to face being alone again. Ever since I had my first girlfriend at 14, I had cherished the security of being in a relationship, even when it was obvious that we weren't suited. I had friends that went months without girlfriends, or spent their time flirting and sleeping around with lots of different girls, and they were happy. But not me. I can flirt, no problem, but I'm terrible at actually making a move. I'm petrified of being turned down, and being laughed at. That happened to me countless times until I was sixteen and filled out. I'm aware that girls now think I'm good-looking, but inside a big part of me is still a geeky, gangly fourteen-year-old boy that spent most of his childhood lonely, with just one close friend, Emmett. A friend I nearly lost through my own stupidity.

The first train finally arrives, and I collapse in the first seat in the first carriage. It turns out to be first class, but it's deserted and the ticket inspector lets me stay there without charging me. The journey goes quickly and by 8.30 I'm heading into East London. I'm about to get off at Bethnal Green to head back to my flat when a thought hits me. Bella's probably up by now. I could go see her. I'm supposed to be going over to see her later anyway and I know that she's not planning to go anywhere today.

I need to see her friendly face.

I stay on the Tube and get off at Mile End, and walk the quarter-mile or so to her flat. Bella's my advocacy project partner this semester, and brilliant to work with, not to mention the fact that she's become a great friend. She opens the door all surprised, her wet hair cascading over her shoulders, her face looking dewy and fresh. She's such a beautiful sight to behold. I can't deny that I'm totally hot for her, but I'd never do anything about it unless I was sure she felt the same way. I couldn't cope with the rejection.

Bella takes one look at me and makes me have a shower and shave, even digging out some clean clothes. Whilst I'm doing that she makes the most amazing breakfast spread and is so comforting and warm when I tell her about the break-up with Victoria that I nearly cry. We spend the day watching trash TV and eating. It's the most fun I've had in years.

After spending the day with Bella, I head home and crash for ten hours of restful, dreamless sleep. I come down the next morning, in a better mood than I possibly should be considering I broke up with my girlfriend, to find Kate, one of my coursemates, sitting at my kitchen table wearing my flatmate Garrett's favourite England rugby shirt, and not much else.

"Hey Edward." She greets me cheerfully, as if it's not strange for her to be sitting there.

"Err...hi." I get out Crunchy Nut Cornflakes and milk, and serve myself a huge bowl. "So...you and Garrett, huh?"

"Yeah. Finally." She grins to herself. "Good weekend?"

"Not really. Victoria and I broke up."

"Oh shit! Sorry Dude!"

"It's OK. It's been on the cards for a long time."

"How long?" _Since the moment I laid eyes on Bella. _

"A few months." I shrug.

"And you're OK?"

"Yeah. I was a mess yesterday but I'm better now. Thanks to Bella."

"Bella?"

"Yeah, I went round to hers yesterday. We were supposed to be working on our project but that went down the pan, so she made brunch and we just hung out." Kate's grin had changed to a perplexed look; she tilted her head and looked at me through one eye. She looked a bit like a confused cocker spaniel. "What?"

"Do you like Bella? _Like _like her?" I do. Fucking hell, I really do. She's utterly perfect. I shrug again.

"She's a great girl and she's hot." I repIy, trying to sound nonchalant. I don't need the whole of our class knowing the depths of my adoration of Bella Swan. Until I'm sure Bella feels the same, I'm not making a move. If she said no, I think part of my heart might die.

"Don't get your hopes up there, Dude. She's totally doing her flatmate."

_What?_

_WHAT?_

_FUCK!_

"What, that Jake guy?" Mr Tall, Dark and Muscled. Great.

"Yeah. For a while."

"She's never said anything. I see her every day."

"Maybe she doesn't want to advertise who she fucks. She seems like a pretty private person."

"She is." I agreed. She was also very shy. She didn't like to talk about herself at all.

"You know, just because Bella's not into you..." her words cut through me. Shit. _Bella's not into me._ I bristled with disappointment. "...doesn't mean you don't have options. I know a few girls that _are _into you, one in particular. Can you guess?"

"No. Who?"

"I shouldn't say..."

"But you're going to, otherwise you wouldn't bring it up." I stare her down a little. She rolls her eyes and smiles.

"You're right. Jessica."

"Jessica?" Kate's flatmate? I don't know her all that well, but she seems sweet. She's pretty- light brown hair with blonde bits, a cute face and she definitely has a good rack and ass. Not as good as Bella's, mind.

"Don't tell her I told you but she's really into you. You should ask her out. She's a sure thing. Guaranteed." Kate tells me, rather excitedly.

"Yeah. We'll see. I need a bit of time. I just ended a three-year relationship."

"I suppose."

Garrett turns up then, and I'm grateful. I need to escape in order to wallow in misery for a while. I tell myself on my way back to my room that Bella's way too good for an idiot like me. Perhaps it's a good thing she's off the market. Then I can't get my hopes up.

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	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Hello everyone! Thanks to those of you who reviewed and who have added this story to alerts/favourites. **

**I'm publishing two more chapters this week, and once again they will correspond to the respective chapters of 'The Tide is High.'**

**I don't own Twilight. I'm just playing with her wonderful characters in my sandbox of plot bunnies.**

**-cc-**

**Three**

I'm starting to wonder if Jessica and I weren't ready to live together yet. I can't seem to do anything right, and it's only been a few weeks since we moved into our flat in St Katharine's Dock.

First it was the way I organised my DVDs.

"Why don't you have these organised alphabetically?" She had asked, a hint of condescension in her voice.

"They are organised alphabetically, by genre, then director, then title."

"That's stupid. Why not just organise them all alphabetically by title?"

"Because when I decide to watch a movie, I think of the genre I want to watch first, then the director, not the title."

She didn't get it.

The second thing was my hair.

"I just think you should try a more...sensible cut before you start working at VDI. Maybe a short back and sides?"

"Jess, I've tried it before and it just doesn't suit me. Plus, it grows in tufts so after a week it looks really weird. At least if it's longer, it's less obvious that it grows unevenly."

I kind of liked my hair the way it was. It was my thing, my quirk.

"I still think you could try it." She had harrumphed.

The third thing was her having a go at me because I was hopeless in the kitchen.

"Edward, is it really too much to ask for you to _try_ to learn how to make something other than toast. I'm doing all the cooking here."

"Well, I'm doing all the cleaning up! How is it you need two chopping boards, three saucepans and a frying pan to make a mushroom risotto, anyhow?"

"That's just how it's made!" I'm sure it's not. I've seen Bella make it with a chopping board and a big deep frying pan.

I try. I really do. But me and cooking equals disaster. I just don't get it.

There's one other thing not quite right, but Jess hasn't said anything and neither and I. I daren't, because I think it'll open a big can of worms that I don't want to deal with.

We don't have sex anymore. The thing is, I'm really not bothered, and she doesn't seem to be either. I've never been Mr Insatiable, but I just seem to have no interest in it at all. And it's normal for a couple's sex life to wane a little over the years, isn't it?

It isn't all bad though. We have a great time on holiday in Greece, island hopping, and once Jess starts working at her firm, a couple of weeks before I start my job at Volturi Denali and Ireland, she's much happier and less nagging. Jess and I have always had fun together and I'm hopeful that we'll get over our teething problems once we're both settled and working.

I'm a bundle of nerves on my first day at VDI. The good thing is that Bella is going to be starting in the same office on the same day and she always calms me down. It's like she's human Diazepam or something and I have missed her. We've not been as close in the past couple of years as we were in our first year of law school but I still think of her as one of my best friends. With final exams and the summer holidays I've not seen her in months. For some reason, she didn't come to the law school graduation ceremony. I sent her a message on Facebook asking why but she didn't reply.

She looks beautiful as always but something's not right. Maybe she's as nervous about VDI as I am, although she has no need to be. Bella was the best in our class and I know she was the same at Cambridge. She's going to soar at VDI. As she walks in, I'm so happy to see her I sweep her into a big hug, but put her down quickly as I remember that we're in a professional environment.

As she sits down I try to appraise what's different. She looks a bit thinner, more delicate. There's a slight sadness to her huge brown eyes.

She asks me about my summer and about Jess and I tell her about our Greek holiday, our new flat and Jess settling into her new job. I am unprepared, however, for Bella's answer when I ask how she's been.

"Me, well I went to Rome to see my brother and his wife for a couple of weeks, and Jake dumped me and moved back to Cardiff." She says, almost offhandedly. _What the fuck?_

"Sorry what? Jake left you?" She nods and her cheeks grow rosy. "Bella, God! I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry!" _Jake's a fucking idiot. Bella is an angel. Does he not know how lucky he's been to have her?_

"That's good enough." She replies.

"How are you doing?" I ask. They had seemed so solid and secure. It must have affected her greatly when he left her.

"I'm OK, thanks. I had a rough couple of weeks but I'm getting used to being by myself. I've been really looking forward to starting work."

"Well, you know you can always come round whenever you want, if you get sick of being alone. We're always there for you Bella." I squeeze her hand and feel a rush of tingling up my arm as our skin meets. _Edward, you love Jessica._ I remind myself as a deep dark hidden part of me starts to fantasise about what it would be like to have Bella instead.

"Thanks Edward."

A whistle from the head of the conference room table interrupts our conversation. As we turn our attention to the HR manager who is addressing us, I tell myself off for even having the thought of Bella as more than a friend in my head. _You chose Jessica, Edward. You love Jessica. She's your future._ But I'm kidding myself. The seeds of doubt have been sown.

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	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Here's the second of two chapters for today. I hope you enjoy!**

**I don't own Twilight. I'm just taking the characters for a spin in my stories.**

**-cc-**

**Four**

It's been a ridiculously long Friday, which involved hours of meticulously translating Italian legal documents and then presenting a summary to the executives involved in the case who then asked me a hundred zillion questions about it. It was super-stressful. Usually when we do these presentations, Bella takes the lead but she's been sitting in on Tanya Denali's meetings with one the clients at their main headquarters in Bedfordshire today so it's fallen to me.

I take a deep breath before entering the flat. Things between Jess and I have not been great lately. She was supremely pissed that I didn't go with her to the wedding of her friend Samantha in Exeter because I was working, but that was really the icing on the cake. I just don't know what we have in common anymore. We don't have sex, we haven't for months, and we either argue over small shit or don't talk at all. Strangely, she has seemed happier since that wedding, but it's not because of anything I've done.

When I do walk in, I can't see Jess but I can hear her. She's in our spare room, on the phone, again. She's been spending hours on the phone every night for the past week chatting to friends. I can't figure out what's so important that she needs to talk in the spare room, away from my ears, but actually I don't really care.

I know what I should do. I should sit Jess down and tell her that it's not working out, that I'm not happy and that I'm sure she's not either. But when I think about it, I imagine the crippling loneliness and the feeling of utter failure that has accompanied every single break-up I've had. Still, if I was single, I could maybe, eventually, ask Bella out. After all, she's been single since Jake broke up with her a few months ago. No, she'd never say yes. Not if she likes big buff built guys like Jake. Plus isn't there some girl code that says they're not allowed to go out with their friends' exes? Would Bella be a girl who would follow that?

As I open the fridge, throw together a cheese and ham sandwich (Jess hasn't bothered cooking for me at all recently), dig out a cereal bar from the back of the cupboard and open a beer, I think about the weekend I spent two weeks ago working with Bella.

First she brings us an awesome picnic of food including the world's best brownies. Then she saves my ass when I nearly lose half my summary, observes that I'm stressed out over Jess and work, and best of all, gives me the most amazing neck and shoulder massage, which loosens up my muscles. It's not sexual in any way, but very nurturing. Bella makes me feel cherished, even though she doesn't think about me in that way. I realised, after I got home from that day, that I was much happier spending the day at work with Bella than at a wedding, at anything, with Jess.

I'm nearly done with my sandwich when Jessica comes through from the spare room.

"Oh. I didn't hear you come in." She says, pouring herself a glass of water from the tap. I don't know how she can drink it straight from the tap. London water tastes of chemicals. I have a jug filter which she thinks is pointless.

"Yeah, you were on the phone."

"Um, that's right. I was talking to um, Kate."

"Oh, yeah? What's the goss?"

Jess looks surprised that I've asked. I haven't bothered for weeks.

"Oh, mainly wedding stuff. She's stressing about whether to have a covered walkway from the marquee to the toilets, or whether to risk everyone getting wet."

"It sounds like a really small thing, but I guess you don't want your guests to look like drowned rats."

"I know, right!" Jess smiles for the first time in ages. "I told her exactly that, although I wished I didn't because she's added it to my list of bridesmaid duties!"

"Oops!" I return her smile, although the air is still stilted and awkward. "What else?"

"Well, she and Garrett went out to Moro last night and saw Bella and her new bloke. She kept that one quiet!"

I nearly spurt out my mouthful of beer.

"Bella's got a new bloke? She never said anything at work!"

"No? Well, she's always played her cards close to her chest..." It was true. According to Kate she'd been with Jake for months before she finally announced him as her boyfriend. "...and Kate says he's really hot! He's called Riley and apparently he's a stockbroker and really buff. Muscles galore apparently..."

_Why wouldn't she tell me something like that? We spend 80 plus hours a week working together! _

"Right. Good for her."

"Ooh, don't tell her I told you though! Apparently she asked Kate not to tell anyone."

"But Kate told you anyway, and you told me anyway?" It bugged me that Jess and Kate always did this. They never could keep their mouths shut.

"What the fuck, Edward! We were having a nice conversation! Why do you always have to be so fucking holier than thou?"

"What? Jess..."

"Forget it! I'm going to sleep in the spare room!" She storms off. And once again, in the blink of an eye, our truce is over.

I finish my beer and head to bed myself. As I crawl in, I hear her through the wall on the phone again. No doubt she is complaining about me to one of her friends.

I try to sleep, but my head's whirling. Now that Bella is off the market, maybe I should try to re-invest in my relationship with Jessica. Maybe.

-cc-

I toss and turn all night but eventually fall asleep. I am woken at 7am by the sound of the bedroom door opening. I sit up.

"Jess?" Her face is tearstained and she is snivelling. She's holding an empty overnight bag in her hand.

"I can't do this anymore Edward."

"You're leaving." The fear of loneliness sweeps through me, and the panic.

"This isn't working. You're not happy with me and I'm definitely not happy with you."

"What can I do Jess, to make you stay?" I'm saying the words, wanting her to stay but also knowing that our relationship is over, that it needs to be over.

"No Edward..."

"Maybe we just need some time, and we could work it out." I plead, but it's futile. "Please think about it Jess." I add in a whisper but I know that's not what she wants. I'm not what she wants.

"I have! Edward, look, it's not you, OK? I don't feel the same way anymore. And if you were being honest with yourself, you'd admit that you don't feel the same, that perhaps, deep down, you were never really in love with me in the first place. And I don't think I was either."

It's true. I can't deny it. As I stand there in silence, she continues.

"Edward, we both deserve to be truly happy in love." Her eyes sparkle as she says this and I suddenly realise that the phone calls in the spare room aren't to friends, they're to one 'friend.' A new, male friend. I stare back at her and she looks away. Her face is guilty.

"I'm going to go to the gym." I announce suddenly, swinging my legs out of bed. "There's bound to be someone who'll be up for a tennis match or two by the time I get there."

"OK. I'm going to my parents' house for the weekend and I'll be in touch about moving out."

"Fine." I change quickly and without looking at her again, leave.

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	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Hello all! I hope you're all still enjoying Edward's point of view. Thank you if you're one of the lovely people who have reviewed. **

**Just a reminder that these chapters correspond to the equivalent chapter in 'The Tide is High.'**

**Thanks again for reading. **

**I don't own Twilight, just this story. **

**-cc-**

**Five**

Bella completely understands when she finds out why I didn't grab her for a dance at the Italian Job's closing party. She understands that Emmett's the closest I have to a brother and that he needed me. Over the next few weeks, we get closer. Bella cooks for me and I take her out for dinner. We don't call them dates but that's what they're starting to feel like, at least to me. She never ever mentions that Riley guy so I can only presume (and hope) that she's dumped him. She is also very good about not mentioning Jessica, who, after she dumped me, moved into Bella's spare room. I know Jess has a new boyfriend but Bella's very tactful and never mentions them when we hang out.

By June I'm feeling brave enough to plan myself a lavish birthday party at Galvin at Windows just so I can seduce Bella. Things have felt a bit different recently. I'm terrible at reading signs from women unless they're obvious, which isn't Bella's style, but she's seemed just a touch more affectionate, a bit more flirtatious.

The day of my birthday arrives, and I arrive late, thanks to a last-minute phone call in the office. Bella takes my breath away. Dressed in a column of silver, long hair cascading down her back, she is stunning. I go straight to her and have to stop myself from kissing her beautiful rosy lips. I make sure we sit next to each other and we spend the meal mostly talking to each other. She leans back against my arm and I can't help but tangle my fingers in the ends of her silken tresses now and then.

As she reaches for her wine glass, I notice that Bella has a small scar along her right wrist. She catches me looking at it and I can't help but reach out to stroke it. Her skin feels so unbelievably soft. She tells me how she got the scar, falling over. We joke about her klutziness and then I find myself telling her about the scar on my left arm, from the motorcycle accident, when I nearly killed myself and Emmett. I don't tell her it's Emmett who was with me on the bike though. I can't quite admit that yet. I also don't mention how he was in hospital for a week with a head injury thanks to me.

Bella strokes the scar and the sensation goes straight to my groin. Her touch is so warm, and electricity shoots all over me. I grab her hand and press it into the scar so she can feel the metal plate that holds my bones together. She seems fascinated and strokes it again, and once more I feel those sparks of fire in my skin. I can't believe how much she turns me on with just a simple touch. She starts to apologise for touching my scar and I bend down into her ear and whisper,

"Don't be. You can't imagine how good that feels." I reciprocate by stroking her scar again and her eyes flutter closed as she replies,

"I think I have an idea."

Could it be that she _does_ feel the same way?

We are interrupted by the arrival of my birthday cake. I'm touched but I wished it could have been a few minutes later.

After the cake, all of us except Alice, who has other plans, head to Sloane Square for drinks. I make sure that I am right by Bella's side. I don't let her buy a single drink and after we've had a couple, I let my hand drift to the small of her back and slowly up and down. She doesn't say anything, but she doesn't stop me, and in fact nudges an inch closer to my side. We've not drunk that much because our conversation is pretty sensible but I'm very close to leaning down and telling her in her ear that she is the sexiest creature on this planet and that she's driving me crazy.

My plans are scuppered, however, by the arrival of a tall, rangy blond guy with blue eyes and tanned skin, looking cooler than cool, with a distinct Texan twang. To my horror he's addressing Bella, who squeals and literally jumps into his arms. It turns out he's an old friend of her family's and she disappears off to chat to him at the bar. I'm fuming, but I manage to keep the conversation going with Garrett and Tyler. However, every couple of minutes I look over to the bar. Bella's laughing and touching his arm and I'm so pissed that Fate has stepped in and distracted Bella from me with this American guy who Bella seems to find really hot and really funny.

She's back by my side within half an hour and apologises, explaining that she'd not seen him for 15 years. My jealousy takes its time to dissipate but I am delighted to have her back next to me. I begin to think about suggesting a club so I can get her into my arms, do some dancing and perhaps move in for a kiss or two. Emmett seems to be on the same wavelength as he starts to suggest moving on. I look towards Kings' Road and suddenly spot a familiar face

Jessica.

She's in the arms of a blond guy, not as tall as me, not as lean as me, who has a round baby-face. I know this is Mike. I've never seen her look happier. Suddenly, even though it's months since our break-up, I feel the pain of being alone as if it's new. I look at Bella, beautiful, angelic Bella, and realise that if I mess up with her, then I'm going to lose her forever. I can't cope with that thought.

Feeling completely overwhelmed, and despite the fact that Bella is trying to soothe me by holding my hand in her delicate one, I run away.

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	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Hello all! Here's the second of two chapters being published today.**

**Just a reminder that these chapters correspond to the equivalent chapter in 'The Tide is High.'**

**Thanks again for reading. **

**I don't own Twilight, just this story. **

**-cc-**

**Six**

_Saturday 23.16: Hey, are you OK? Text me when you're home so we know you got there safe. If you want to talk, call me anytime. Bella xxx_

_Sunday 10.04: Seriously, Edward, I'm worried. Please let me know you're OK. See you tomorrow at work if not before. Bella xxx_

I don't get Bella's messages until Monday morning after I've recharged my phone battery. As soon as I read them my heart clenches. She always goes above and beyond for me and I don't deserve it. I don't deserve her.

I get to the office and walk by her desk but she's not there. Shelly, Bella's department administrator, calls out from her desk to tell me that Bella's in a meeting with Tanya Denali and will be done around 11.

When I return, I bring Bella's favourite coffee from Starbucks and prepare to apologise. But when I get there, she's packing up her desk. I ask her what's going on and it turns out, she's being moved to the Litigation department, who are based at Canary Wharf. My first thought is that I'm going to miss seeing her beautiful face every day.

"Look, I just wanted to apologise for Saturday night, and for not replying to your texts. I shouldn't have run off like that. We were having a great time until I let seeing Jess ruin it." I tell her.

"That was the first time you'd seen her since she moved out. It was bound to be weird, and seeing her with Mike as well. That had to be hard." She's so understanding, I nearly feel tears at the back of my eyes.

"Yeah. It was a real shock. She looked so happy as well. It hit me hard that I never made her that happy, not ever. So I spent the whole of yesterday wallowing." I acknowledge. "Sorry I let my phone battery die so I didn't get your message until this morning."

"That's OK. I just wanted to make sure you were OK. Better now?" She asks, and I nod.

"Yeah, I was going to see if you wanted to go out tonight for dinner, make up for being an idiot on Saturday, but I'm guessing you're not going to know how your day's going to pan out. I hear they work you to the bone in Litigation." I say, hoping she realises that I mean it as a date.

"No...but I kind of had plans tonight anyway." _Plans? Please tell me you're going out with Alice or Kate or something. Please, please don't say you've got a date with that Jasper guy._

"Oh?"

"Yeah, drinks with Jasper. You know, the old friend who we bumped into on Saturday?" _Shit._

"I remember." I reply, unable to stop myself from sounding a little short. "Well, I'd better leave you to it. Text me later, OK?"

"Sure."

She doesn't text me though, not for several days, and when she does it's only to say that she's so busy she's practically living at the Canary Wharf office. After two weeks, when I'm at Canary Wharf for a meeting, I decide to pop in to see her and bring her a hazelnut latte. I nip into Starbucks and am in the line when I hear a very familiar laugh. I peer round the corner into the seating area to see Bella having coffee with Jasper. She's sat right next to him, laughing at some story he's telling. Jealousy surges through me and I'm so fucking pissed off with myself for not capitalising on the chance I had with her the night of my birthday party that I want to scream and yell. Now she's been swept off her feet by Jasper, Mr American Smooth. Fuck My Life.

I walk out of the Starbucks sans coffee and head back to my London City Office. I get into the lift and my whole body just slumps.

"Why so sad, Edward?" It's Heidi, Tanya Denali's assistant. I didn't notice her enter the lift behind me.

"Hey, Heidi." I reply. She's a pretty girl under all that window-dressing. Not as pretty as Bella, but then no girl is. "Not sad. It's just been a bit of a shitty week."

"Oh. Want some company later? I'm a great distraction!" She runs her finger up my arm and taps my nose. I can't help but laugh. She's always flirting with me.

"Thanks Heidi, that's sweet of you."

"But you're gonna turn me down aren't you?" She pouts and I laugh again.

"Yes. Sorry. I'd be terrible company right now."

"Well, for you, I'm available anytime, OK?"

"Thanks." The lift pings and I exit. _Well, at least one girl out there wants me. I just wish it was Bella._

-cc-


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Well, the weather has ruined my weekend plans. One month's rain in two days equals flooding equals not being able to get out of town. Oh well, at least it means I'm able to post tonight instead of next week. **

**Here's the first of two chapters tonight, and there's one chapter of 'The Tide is High' as well. **

**Enjoy and let me know what you think, if you feel like it!**

**I don't own Twilight or its original characters. I own this plot bunny, Lawyer-ward and Boardroom-Bella!**

**-cc-**

**Seven**

I am such a fucktard.

I just kissed Bella. On the mouth. And she didn't react. Not at all.

But I did. Or rather, my dick did. Instant, painfully good hardness.

It happened so quickly. I only meant to give her a quick Happy New Year kiss on the cheek, but she looked so gorgeous, so beautiful, and smelled so unbelievably good. Her lips were right there and mine found hers.

I knew instantly that it was a mistake, because she froze. She went absolutely rigid. She blatantly didn't feel the fire that I was feeling.

I pulled away and got up as quickly as I could, because I didn't want her to see the tent in my trousers. As it happened, Heidi rang at that point and I used it as a convenient excuse to get out of the room. After listening to Heidi blather on for a couple of minutes I tell her I have to get back to work and excuse myself to the toilets to relieve my aching groin. I imagine Bella kissing me back, pushing me onto my back on the floor of the copy room and having her wicked way with me, riding me hard, and it takes me very little time at all to reach a climax.

Unfortunately, I know that I am going to face a different reality. I grab a Dairy Milk for her from the vending machine and head back to the copy room. By the time I get back, Bella has finished all the data packs. I can tell by her red face and straight back that she is supremely pissed off with me.

"Hey, I brought you a Dairy Milk from the machine. I know the plain ones are your favourite."

"I'm not in the mood for it, but thanks." She says, keeping her lovely face turned away from me.

"Right." I am in such deep shit. "Look Bella, about before..."

"You shouldn't have done that!" She shouts. "You have a girlfriend and that was overstepping a line!"

"I know. I'm sorry!" I try to move closer to her but she's having none of it. "I don't know what came over me! It's just that I..."

"Save it. Look, I've finished the data packs and I'm going home. I'll see you in the boardroom on Monday."

"Bella..."

"Look, I'm tired, I'm hungry, I smell of print room, I've just been dumped and my closest male friend who has a girlfriend just kissed me. It doesn't matter that you didn't mean it! My head's pounding and I just need to get the fuck out of here!" She yells. "Just...just give me some space."

"But..." She fixes her chocolate brown eyes on me, but they are full of fire, not serene like usual. "OK." I step back and slump against the photocopier. She walks away and my heart fissures.

Bella's right of course. I shouldn't have kissed her like that, not on the floor of a dirty copy room when I'm attached to someone else. I've not really been fair to Heidi either, but it's not her I'm worried about losing.

I respect her request for space, even though what I want to do is to fall at her feet and beg her for forgiveness. She remains civil to me when we go out with our friends but there is a touch of coldness. I don't get any chance to build bridges though because two weeks after New Year, she is seconded to Rome.

Bella and I have very little communication in the four months she is away. I try to put her out of my mind and commit to Heidi. She can be a real sweetheart, even if she can be a little catty and superficial at times.

I get word through the VDI grapevine and Facebook that Bella is returning in mid-May and part of me is thrilled. I hope that the time and distance has allowed her to forgive me and that she'll give me the chance to build our friendship again. I happen upon a newspaper advertisement for one of Bella's favourite bands, The Bongolian, who are playing in London a week or so after her return. I took her to Ronnie Scotts, the famous Soho jazz club, not long after Jessica and I broke up, where they happened to be playing, and she fell in love with their 1960s beatnik funk music. On impulse I buy two tickets, hoping that she will go with me when she gets back.

The very next day, Heidi announces that she has booked us a two-week holiday to Florida for exactly the time of Bella's return. Non-refundable tickets. I am not impressed that she didn't check with me first, but I can't exactly tell my girlfriend that the reason I'm annoyed is because I want to welcome back another girl.

Emmett notices that I'm distracted and after much effort on his part, I tell him about my feelings for Bella.

"Yeah, I know." He says nonchalantly.

"What?"

"'Dward, it's so obvious man. You practically drool whenever Bella walks in the room. You're always hyperaware of where she is, and you hang on every word she says."

"Jeez, do you think it's obvious to everyone?"

"No, man. It's just 'cause I've known you since we were sperm. So why are you with Heidi if you're so into Bella?"

I shrug.

"Because Bella doesn't want me and Heidi does."

"You see, I've always thought that she liked you too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah man. All that blush whenever you come in the room, those big eyes following you around. I really think she likes you too."

I shake my head and tell him what happened at New Year.

"Dude!" Em exclaims.

"I know! I'm hoping that we can build our friendship back up when she comes back from Rome, but I'm shit-scared that it'll never be the same again."

"Not that, 'Dward! Her reaction. I don't think Bella was pissed at you because she didn't like it. I think she was pissed because she wanted it, because she wanted you, but you're with Heidi, and she was all upset anyway because of that shithead Felix yelling at her."

"No, Em, I don't think so..." but even as I was saying it, hope was bubbling its way up my chest.

"Maybe you should test it out."

"What do you mean?"

"When you next see her, maybe drop into conversation that you're thinking about marrying Heidi, and see what Bella's reaction is."

"What? I've got no intention of proposing to Heidi."

"I didn't say _propose_. I said, tell Bella you're thinking of proposing, or imply it in some way. I'm pretty sure that she'll be devastated."

"I don't know..."

"It's just an idea, man. Think about it."

And I do. A lot.

-cc-


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: So this is the second of two chapters of 'High Stays the Tide' today. Thank you to all who reviewed and who have added this to alerts or favourites. **

**I don't own Twilight or the original characters. I just make them do stupid things before letting them have a HEA!**

**-cc-**

**Eight**

**Part 1**

It's a glorious balmy March day, sunny but not too warm. Alice, Bella's best friend, is getting married today to Jasper. Jasper is Bella's ex-boyfriend (and her older brother Peter's best friend) but she has never seemed to mind that Alice and Jasper have ended up together and are getting married after less than two years as a couple.

I can't deny that I'm most looking forward to seeing Bella again. She has been in Leeds for nine months now, and it seems that from her sadly-too-infrequent texts and Facebook messages, she absolutely loves it there. She's thriving in the Industrial Law division, she's bought a house and seems to have a great social life. Meanwhile I feel a bit like I'm swimming through tar in London. The cases in the Finance division are tedious and samey, but generate huge amounts of inane paperwork. The clients are all bankers, stockbrokers or hedge fund managers; most of them are assholes.

Heidi and I are getting along well but as we continue in our relationship, the differences between us seem more pronounced. The value of money and hard work seems lost on her- she only works at VDI because her father thinks she should have some experience of being a 'working girl' before she gets married. Her reward is that he pays for her exclusive apartment in Bayswater (including all the bills) and puts two pounds in her bank account for every pound she earns, and her father even got her job for her through 'connections'. She has started to talk about us getting married in the future, but whenever I've countered with suggestions we live together first, she has played the 'I'm a good Christian girl who won't live in sin' card.

Alice and Jasper are getting married at St William's College, part of York Minster. The roads in the centre of historic York are narrow and windy and the paths we have to walk to get to the Minster are cobbled, so Heidi's choice of six-inch platform stilettos is very unwise. She is already annoyed with me because I pointed out that her choice of outfits for the wedding aren't really in keeping with the 1930s-themed wedding, an idea Heidi thinks is 'lame.' When I suggest she either bring a flat pair of shoes with her or change into more sensible heels, she is utterly aghast. Things escalate and she ends up point blank refusing to go to the ceremony.

When I arrive I immediately look for Bella, but then realise that she won't be at the venue yet because as maid of honour she will be arriving with the bride. I am surprised and delighted to see Ben and Angela. I haven't seen them in a couple of years, not since they came to London for a weekend to visit when Angela was around five months pregnant. They are now the proud parents of Jared and Alexander, identical twin boys who have Angela's dark colouring but are otherwise the spitting image of Ben. They explain that they have become close friends with Alice and Jasper since Bella introduced them.

I am then spotted by Peter who is one of the best men. He greets me warmly, remembering me from our meeting in Rome a few years ago, as does his wife Charlotte, and they introduce me to their adorable daughter Gianna, who is around eighteen months old. Gianna is fair like both her parents (Peter has light sandy hair and what must the Swan family's signature dark brown eyes, and Charlotte, whose mother is Finnish, has ice-blonde hair and blue eyes) but her dark brown eyes are so deep that they make her look more like Bella than her father.

I immediately imagine what a child of mine and Bella's might look like. My heart pangs as I think of a girl with my auburn curls, Bella's chocolate eyes and her exquisite heart-shaped face. _ To be married and have children with Bella- my most treasured fantasy. One I hold onto even though I have no hope of it coming true._

I take my seat next to Ben and Angela and very soon, the bridal march starts. Alice looks ecstatic as she walks in on her father's arm towards Jasper, who is smiling widely yet sniffing back happy tears. Her dress is pure white silk. It spills down her petite torso and into a long train; she looks effortlessly glamorous. Walking behind her is the vision that is Isabella Swan, on the arm of Seth, her and Alice's other best friend from Cambridge. Her dress is nearly identical to Alice's except that it is a vivid, verdant, shimmery shade of green, and has no train. My heart stutters and my groin tightens as she passes us; the dress is backless except for a scoop of green silk that possibly highlights more than it covers, and is highlighted by an emerald jewel that sits between her shoulder-blades on a silver pendant. Bella's smooth, flawless back is one of the sexiest things I have ever seen.

It takes me ages to pin down Bella long enough to talk to her. Alice has clearly given her a whole load of duties, from coordinating the photographer to keeping Alice's warring sets of grandparents apart, to stopping Jasper's relatives from stealing the vintage china. When I finally do stop her, I manage to compliment her on how beautiful she looks, and I'm rewarded by the appearance of a very appealing blush all over her face, neck and chest. However, Alice quickly calls her back to assist her in the ladies' room, and I don't get the chance to talk to her again at St William's College, or at the evening reception at the hotel, Middlethorpe Hall.

Heidi finally deigns to turn up at the evening party in a tight, clingy, stretchy, short blood-red dress and the black stilettos I had advised against earlier in the day. Everyone else is the picture of elegance in their 1930s clothing. Heidi looks like she belongs in some futuristic fetish club. I am utterly mortified at her lack of propriety and selfishness. Alice gave everyone nine months' notice about her intent to have a 1930s wedding and included a two-page list of suggested places to buy or hire appropriate clothes with the invite. I see Bella, elegantly flitting around the room, doing everything in her power to make Alice and Jasper's day perfect, so kind and selfless.

I wish I deserved her heart.

-cc-

**Part 2**

I am desperately trying to finish off the piles of paperwork on my desk before the weekend. It is Rosalie's birthday and we're off to Paris in the morning. I'm definitely not at my best though. I haven't slept properly this week because I'm so anxious, for one simple reason.

Bella.

God, I miss her. So much. Too much, considering I am now engaged to Heidi. In the six months since she started hinting about marriage but refusing to move in with me, the hints had turned into tantrums.

"We've been together for over two years, Edward, two whole years! If you really love me, then you'll marry me! Simple as! And if you're not prepared to propose, then I'm not prepared to waste any more time in this relationship!"

I could see her point, but I continued to drag my heels for a while because deep down I knew my heart was still Bella's. Bella's birthday was a couple of weeks after Heidi's outburst and on impulse I decided to send her flowers. The florist suggested a miniature rock garden featuring purple Aster flowers, as they were the birth flower for September. With the flowers I sent a card. I wrote and rewrote it several times but eventually took a plunge and added the line:

_I miss you. I miss you more than words can say._

Sending the plant and card were my last hopes that Bella might feel something more than just friendship. The next evening, I got a text from her with a picture of the rock garden. It said:

_Thank you for the beautiful plant, and for the birthday message. Bella xxx_

No 'I miss you too.' Not at all. My last hopes fades away in the wind. I texted her back to tell her I was looking forward to seeing her, not conveying my crushing disappointment.

I went to Tiffany's the next day, bought the biggest princess-cut platinum diamond ring I could afford and went to Heidi's apartment. I proposed then and there, but as I slipped the ring on her finger, I didn't feel joy. I felt dead inside.

At 6pm, just as I finally seem to be on top of the work, my mobile rings. It's Heidi's father, Corin.

"_Hello Edward."_

"Um, hello sir. Everything OK?"

"_Heidi's in hospital. It's all happened rather last minute but she's asking for you..."_

"What?" I jump up out of my seat. "What happened?"

"_She wants to tell you herself, Edward. I'm sorry I can't tell you more."_

"How is she?"

"_She's in a lot of pain."_

"Where?"

"_St Edmunds Hospital. It's in..."_

"I know where it is. I'm on my way!"

I rush to the underground car park where I keep my little-used silver Volvo C30 (it's far too much hassle to drive in Central London) and drive out of the city. With the Friday evening traffic, it takes me nearly 3 hours to get to the private hospital near her parents' house in Suffolk and I'm an anxious mess by the time I get there.

I am shown to Heidi's room and prepare myself for the worst. Tubes, bandages, bruising.

Instead, Heidi is her usual coiffed self. She is lying in bed in her favourite pink satin pyjamas reading a magazine. The only things different are that her boobs look two sizes bigger.

"Edward! You came!" I kiss her on the cheek, still confused as to what's going on.

"Of course. My fiancée is in hospital. Part of the job description to attend." I try to sound jovial.

She gently runs her hands over her enhanced cleavage.

"So, I'm now a Double-D! Daddy paid for them as an early Christmas present, and the surgeon was able to fit me in this morning! And by having it done now, the swelling will go down in time for the Christmas parties!"

"Why?" I exclaim.

"What do you mean, why?" She huffs. "I was flat-chested before, and now I'm not!"

"You had beautiful breasts before Heidi. A C cup is not flat-chested!" I involuntarily think about Bella's gentle but luscious cleavage. _Just a handful, just enough._ "Please don't tell me you put yourself through surgery because you thought _I_ would like these!"

"Ha. You wish. These..." she gestures to her rack, "...are going to kickstart my new career!"

"Your new career?"

"Yes. I got spotted by a model agency scout at the Westfield London and he told me I could go really far!" She tells me excitedly.

"You got a boob job after you were spotted in a shopping centre by some guy who tells you that you could be a model?" I ask incredulously.

"Why aren't you being supportive?" She whines. "It's my dream!"

"It's such a competitive industry. Why would you want to put yourself out there like a piece of meat, traipsing from audition to audition, constantly worried about everything you eat or drink...what kind of life is that?"

"You don't think I'm pretty enough, do you? That's great! My fiancé doesn't think I'm pretty!"

"Heidi I think you're beautiful. You didn't need to do this!" My head is starting to throb. "And the day before the trip to Paris? After Rosalie's gone to so much trouble?"

"I don't give a shit about Paris! I needed to do this!" She shouts. "And you know what? I don't think you should be here if you can't be supportive of me!"

"Do you know what, I don't think I should be here either." I move to leave.

"Edward! What, you're actually going?" She screeches. "Don't you fucking dare..."

"Heidi, I'm going to go to Paris. I'll talk to you when I come back."

"Edward..." Her tone turns whiny.

I don't turn back.

-cc-


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: Hi everyone! Thank you to all my reviewers, and those who have added this companion story to favourites/alerts along with 'The Tide is High.'**

**This is the first of two chapters today. Enjoy!**

**I don't own Twilight or its original characters. I just gave them law degrees and took away some of their brain cells, but only temporarily!**

**-cc-**

**Nine**

Oh, holy shit, my head hurts. My brain is thudding against my skull, like it's trying to escape. I open one eye slowly, and then the other, before dragging myself up to a sitting position. As I do so, I am aware of several things simultaneously.

One: I'm definitely in a hotel room at the Georges Cinq in Paris but it's not mine. The room is the wrong way round. And my room had a view of the Avenue de Georges Cinq, but this room has a view of the Marble Courtyard.

Two: I am dressed only in my boxers._ How did that happen?_

Three: My head might be agony, but my body feels utterly relaxed, like someone turned me into a ragdoll overnight. I feel like I've had the best orgasm of my life.

Four: My whole self smells of sex. My hands in particular smell of the sweetest, most delicious pussy, coupled with heady strawberry and freesia.

Strawberry and freesia. It's Bella's distinct scent, one that always affects me. I sink back down the bed and roll into the middle. It's damp, and smells even more strongly of Bella, me and sex. At the end of the bed is a pair of navy satin shorts and a white lacy top. I remember them well. Bella and I once ended up sharing a bed in Rome after a drunken night out during the Italian Job, and she wore them then. They featured in my spank bank for months afterward.

I still can't quite remember how I got here. I remember coming back to my hotel room after saying good night to everyone and raiding the mini-bar for whiskey which I drank neat. I remember crushing sorrow and regret flood me, and how as I was drinking, I was praying to some higher power to help me sort out the mess that was my life. I remember suddenly feeling desperate for a Bella hug. I always feel at peace, at _home_, when her arms are around me.

I feel an overwhelming need for caffeine so I pick up the phone and order coffee for two. In the few minutes before it arrives, I manage to put on my shirt and trousers. At that point it occurs to me that Bella has been in the bathroom for a quite a long time. I get up off the bed and walk over, intending to knock, to check she's OK. But before I do so, I hear the most heartbreaking sound in the world. Bella is in the bathroom, crying. They are short, heaving, helpless sobs and they absolutely break my heart. My own tears cloud my vision and I stumble back a couple of steps. _What exactly happened?_

I hear splashing and then the sound of the shower. A minute or two later, Room Service arrive with the coffee. I dumbly pour it into two cups, leave one on the table for her and sit on the edge of the bed, on Bella's side. I wrack my brain to try to remember what happened between me deciding I wanted to see Bella last night to waking up this morning but no memory comes forward.

A horrible thought comes to mind. What if I forced myself on Bella? What if I acted out one of my many nightly sex dreams out on her in real life?

I suddenly feel sick to the stomach. _Have I turned into a monster that just raped the girl I've loved for over seven years in my drunken slumber?_

The shower goes off and after a couple of minutes, the bathroom door opens. Bella is wrapped in a terrycloth hotel robe that is huge on her. Her pale skin is flushed red from the heat. My heart swells at the sight of her.

"Hey." I gesture at the cup of coffee I've poured for her. "I took the liberty of ordering coffee for us both."

"Thanks." She picks it up and sits across the room from me. As far away from me as possible. "How are you feeling this morning?"

"Ugh. Horribly hungover." I reply, chugging back my coffee before taking a deep breath. I have to find out what happened. "Look, Bella, last night...did we...umm...?"

"Yes." She answers, not looking at me. She's curled herself in the armchair, arms around herself protectively.

"I don't remember it, not at all." I tell her. "But when I woke up the bed smelled of sex and you and...did I initiate it?" I ask inanely. _Of course I initiated it. Bella doesn't want me that way._

Bella nods and glances at me briefly before looking away again. Her eyes are red and guilt prickles all over me at the realisation that her misery is my fault.

"I made you cry, didn't I?" I observe. She goes stiff as a board and doesn't answer. The guilt goes from prickles to arrows through my heart. "D-Did...Did I force myself on you? FUCK! What the fuck was I doing? I'm so sorry Bella, I'm so sorry!"

"No, Edward! It's OK, you..." she starts to say. _How can it be 'OK'?_

"I'm a monster! How could I do that to you? How could I hurt you like that? You're one of my best friends! I...I ra..."

"Stop Edward! You didn't!" she yells, stopping me in my tracks. "Edward, you didn't force me! Yes you initiated it, but you weren't forceful or aggressive. I could have stopped you, but I didn't." Her words come out in a big rush and she is almost panting when she's done.

_She didn't stop me? Why not? Could it be that her feelings for me have changed?_

"Why didn't you?" I ask, but she doesn't answer.

"Bella, why didn't you stop me?" I ask her again, desperate to hear her reasons. She is trembling in the chair and she starts to cry. Tears tumble down her peachy cheeks.

"I didn't want you to stop." She whispers. ""It was beautiful. _You_ were beautiful. Edward, I'm so sorry. I should have stopped you, but I've had feelings for you for such a long time and when you made a move on me it felt so good that I let you keep going."

I am stunned. Bella _does_ have feelings for me. And she _enjoyed_ sex with me?

"You want me? As more than a friend?" I have to double-check.

"Yes." Her voice is hoarse.

"More or less so now we've actually had sex?"

"More." _ Oh my God._

Things don't quite make sense in my brain, though.

"But when I kissed you that New Year, you were so mad at me! You didn't kiss me back!"

"You took me totally by surprise! I didn't have time to kiss you back before you pulled away! And did you ever hear me say that I didn't like it? That I didn't want it?" She cries. _No. No, come to think about it, you never did. _Emmett had been right after all.

"And my reasons for being mad were valid." She continues. "You knew what you were doing then. You had a girlfriend. You walked off seconds after you kissed me to talk to _her._ You were sober!"

"And because I was drunk, that excuses making love to you even though I'm engaged?" I shout back. I'm not angry with Bella, quite the opposite in fact, but my whole world just got turned on its axis and I don't think I can deal with it.

"I didn't say that. I'm wracked with guilt about not stopping you, about letting you cheat on Heidi with me!"

I feel sick. My stomach is churning, my head is throbbing and a different kind of guilt invades my soul. _ I cheated on my fiancée. The girl I promised to marry._ I look at Bella, the girl of my dreams, and I want to be with her so badly, but at this precise moment I need to escape. I have nothing to offer Bella as things stand. I don't know whether I'm coming or going in my life, and Bella deserves a man who can be her rock, who can support her and look after her, the way she looks after everyone else. At the moment, I'm nowhere near able to do that. _Because I'm a fucking joke._

"I should go." I get up and grab my things.

"Edward..." she begins, and I almost hesitate, but the need to run away reigns supreme.

"Bella, I'm so confused right now. My whole life's a big clusterfuck and this whole thing that's happened between us adds a whole other level of complicated. I need to talk to Heidi, sort my head out, sort my_ life_ out." She has shrunk back in the chair. The guilt pierces me anew. I walk over and kiss her on the forehead, unable to leave without feeling her warmth, albeit briefly, one last time.

"I'll be in touch." I promise. I hope she knows that I mean it, because I do. She's the best incentive ever for sorting myself out. "Can you apologise to Rosalie for me- explain that I had to rush back to London?"

I leave without hearing her answer. I run back to my room, throw up five times, change and get myself to the Gare du Nord. The only things I'm sure of when I'm finally on the Eurostar are that I am going to be a single man very soon (as there's no way I can stay engaged to Heidi now), that I've been the biggest idiot in the world for running away and that I need to find the better man within me to make myself worthy of Bella Swan's divine affections.

-cc-


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Hi all! This is the second of two chapters being posted today. Thanks again for reading!**

**I don't own Twilight. I just enjoy playing with Stephenie's characters in my crazy plot bunnies.**

**-cc-**

**Ten**

**Part 1**

I am about to do something I've never done before. I am about to break up with a girl. My fiancée, no less. Sure I broke up with Victoria, but it wasn't a planned break-up. She got me really mad and I did it in the heat of the moment. I am far more used to being the dumpee rather than the dumper.

It's Monday evening, and I am sat on a bench in Kensington Gardens, a short walk away from Heidi's apartment in Bayswater, psyching myself up for what I am going to do. I got back from Paris yesterday but my head was so fried from what happened between me and Bella, and I was so fucking hungover that I just needed to go home and do nothing but sleep through the pain, physical and emotional.

I called in sick today at work because when I woke up this morning I was assaulted by memories, so much so that I couldn't concentrate on anything else. I suddenly remembered what happened between me and Bella, and I actually shed tears when I remembered the warmth of her soft, creamy skin, the feel of her yielding milky breasts under my touch, the way she tasted, how good it felt to be inside her. For so many years I'd wondered, fantasised, day-dreamed about what being with her might feel like. The memories were still tainted by the overpriced scotch I stupidly consumed that night in Paris but they still surpassed my imagination. It was amazing having her in my arms, being surrounded by her heat, her sweet smell, the sounds of her soft moans and the way she said my name.

I know from Heidi's Facebook status that she is back in London and home at her apartment. She is a prolific Facebook user, updating her status several times a day, telling all and sundry about the minutiae of her life. I am utterly unsurprised when her profile features a 'before and after' picture of her cleavage (thankfully clothed). I haven't texted her or called her since I walked out of her hospital room on Friday night, deciding that it's best to just get on with it.

After much deep breathing I get up off the bench and walk up to Heidi's. I am about to buzz her apartment when the door opens. It is Heidi's flatmate and cousin, Dora. They look similar but Dora is some sort of independent rock music producer, who lives in baggy jeans, beaten-up Doc Martens and black t-shirts, the polar opposite of Heidi. Dora and Heidi detest each other but their fathers, who are brothers, wouldn't let either of them live alone in London. The one thing they have in common is that they like Daddy's money.

"Oh, hey Edward, how's things?" she asks.

"Um..."

"Well you look like shit. Just saying."

"I feel it too. Is Heidi in?" I'm sure she is, but I ask anyway. Dora glances up the stairs and smiles wickedly. I wonder why.

"Yeah, she's in. Just head on up, the apartment door is open." She replies. "I gotta go, late for a date."

"Sorry to keep you from your guy. Have fun." I tell her. She throws her head back and laughs.

"God you are so fucking clueless, Edward!" She cackles.

"What?"

"_Girl, _not guy! Seriously, I've been a lesbian since I was ten!"

_Clueless. That's exactly what I am. About everything, women in particular. _

"Shit. Sorry!"

"No worries." She lets go of the door when she sees I have it and skips off down the street, a strange smug look on her face.

Not giving that bizarre little banter any more thought, I head up to the top of the building, where Heidi and Dora have the penthouse, a duplex three bedroom apartment. I push the door open and head to the living room, moving towards the sound of Lady Gaga being played really loudly.

I stop dead in my tracks at what I see. Heidi is on the sofa, in yet another pair of satin pyjamas, this time in red, straddling a fake-tanned blond, slimy, pumped-up guy in his thirties who is kissing her and inching his hands up her torso under her pyjama top. I understand now why Dora was looking smug as she walked off. They don't notice me at all until I walk over to the iPod dock and turn down the music.

"Fuck! Edward! What are you doing here? You don't knock? You just walk in?" She screeches, but she is red-faced at being caught with Mr Muscles. She quickly moves off him.

"Well if you don't want people to walk in, you shouldn't leave the door open." I stride over to the guy and hold out my hand. "Hi, I'm Edward Cullen, Heidi's former fiancé."

I'm actually delighted inside. Her indiscretion means that it's much easier for me to break it off with her.

"Um, I'm Fred." He says sheepishly in an American accent. "Heidi's um, agent."

"Her agent. Right." I say back, a bite of sarcasm in my voice. "Would you mind giving Heidi and I a few minutes to talk?"

"Sure, man. Babe, I'll be on the balcony." He disappears. I move to sit next to Heidi.

"Edward, look..." She looks appropriately apologetic for once in her life.

"Heidi, do you really want to marry me? Because it really doesn't look like it from where I am."

Her bitch-face goes on for a moment but she suddenly relents, looks away from me and shakes her head.

"No. No I don't."

"I don't make you happy."

"No, and I don't make you happy." She agrees. "Edward, you act like all your lawyer shit is, like, so cool and so interesting, but it's really fucking boring. And all your friends are the same! All you talk about is business or clients or money or politics and I'm sick of it!"

"And you think that hearing about which Gucci or Pucci or Armani or Prada dress some Z-list celebrity is wearing in your latest copy of _Hello!_ Magazine is interesting? I retort. "There are more important things going on in the world than fashion and celebrity gossip!"

"God, you never just lighten up. You're such a fucking old man!" She yells back. "So no, I don't want to marry you! I only said I would to keep Daddy happy because he 'approves' of you! There's a whole world out there and me and my new friends..." she rubs her tits gingerly, "...are going to get famous and rich!"

"And you think that Mr Universe over there will help you achieve that? A modelling career, fame, even more fortune? Make you the next Kim Kardashian?"

She says nothing.

"Well, I wish you the best." I get up and start to leave when I remember something. I kneel in front of her and hold her left hand.

"Edward, what..." I slide her engagement ring off her finger. It is in my pocket and I am out of there before she even realises what I have done, but by the time I slam the front door, she is shrieking and swearing like a drunken fishwife. _Did she really think I'd let her keep the ring?_

By the time I am at the Tube station to head back to my flat, the relief I feel is palpable but then I realise that becoming free is irrelevant if I have lost Bella, and I probably have. I left her when she bared her soul to me. She can't possibly want me now she's seen exactly how much of a shit I really am.

-cc-

**Part 2**

Heart pounding and fluttering. Fluttering and pounding.

Blood rushing to my ears. Throb, throb, throb.

Sick feeling in my stomach.

Hands shaking.

Bile rising into my throat.

Breaths coming in gasps.

Dizzy. Room spinning.

I am in the break room on the conference floor. It has been two minutes and thirty seconds since the clients left after we just closed a one hundred million pound deal for them. I can hear my colleagues celebrating in the boardroom but I am on the verge of a panic attack. Scratch that. **I am having a panic attack. **

I sit on one of the chairs and put my head between my legs. I haven't had one of these since I was seventeen, when I got them regularly following the motorcycle accident for nearly three months. They are worse than I remembered. It feels like I am about to die.

"Edward?" I hear Tanya Denali's voice but cannot answer. "Oh, shit. Edward, what's wrong?" She pulls out her mobile and starts dialling, presumably for an ambulance, but I manage to grab her wrist blindly and stop her. This agony will be over in a few minutes.

"No! Ju-ju-just a p-p-pan-ic att-ack." I whisper hoarsely.

"Why?" She asks. "We just closed a massive deal. You've just made a huge bonus."

"C-c-comp-li-c-cate-d." I stutter.

The panicky tight feeling starts to dissipate and I manage to raise my head. Tanya looks worried.

"Sorry." I say when my voice gets back to normal.

"Don't apologise unless you plan on doing that again. Fucking hell Edward!"

"They're beyond my control but I haven't had one for years." I explain.

She paces around, holding her chin.

"Is it because of Heidi?" she asks suddenly. "Because of your break-up?"

_I couldn't give two shits about Heidi. It's about Bella. And the fact that I hate this fucking job._

"It's a lot of things. Part of it's Heidi, I guess. I've not been sleeping too well, and I'm starting to wonder whether I'm cut out for this job." She starts to say something but I continue. "I know I'm capable. After all I did help this deal be successful. But I feel like each and every deal completely drains me and I'm not sure I want to live like that."

Tanya's concern turns into a look of steely determination for a second before her concerned face returns. I'm not fooled. She says I am her protégé but in reality she sees me as a commodity that will make money for her and the firm and she's concerned because she doesn't want to lose me from her team. I know she wants me to be an executive in Finance within the next few years.

"Edward. I need you to be at 100%." She reaches into her handbag and pulls out a card from her business card holder. "Make an appointment and take the rest of the week off. Get some rest."

She strides out of the break room. I turn over the card she's given me.

_Kachiri Hudson_

_Guidance Counsellor and Staff Pastoral Support Coordinator_

_Volturi, Denali and Ireland (London City Office)_

-cc-

"A sabbatical?" Tanya Denali seems sceptical. It is a week until Christmas, and a month since my panic attack in the break room.

"Yes. I think Edward should have a change of scene for a few months. He's been through a lot this year and it's brought up issues that need time to heal." Kachiri explains in her soft Trinidadian-accented voice.

"Edward? Is this what you want?"

"Yes, Miss Denali. I've been run-down and almost burnt out, even before the break-up with Heidi. I think a change of scene will help me refocus." I swallowed hard. "I intend to go to Malawi with my parents for three months. They're setting up a new school and a clinic out there. Then I'm probably going to go travelling." I took the money from the sale of the ring I bought for Heidi and ploughed it into my parents' project. It's a very worthy cause, and I would love to help them out. They would be helping me and my soul just as much.

There is a knock on the door. It is Lucy, Tanya's new assistant, with some tea. Heidi quit after our break-up and is currently in New York with her model agent-slash-new boyfriend Fred, preparing for her new 'career.' I really couldn't care less. I am merely glad that I don't have to see her in the office every day.

After Lucy departs, Tanya lays her cards on the table.

"Edward. I'm going to approve your sabbatical. Six months. Do what you want. However, in six months, you will need to be back here to finish your associate contract."

"Thank you."

"Edward. I really think you could go far at VDI, and I want you to go far in one of my areas- Finance, Global Corporate, M+A or International Capital Markets. I make no secret of the fact that I want you as one of my executives. So if you need to take six months off to be at your best in the future, so be it. But make no mistake. I want you back on Monday 20th June. Understood?"

"Understood."

-cc-


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Hello everyone! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing this story and 'The Tide is High.' **

**I'm publishing two chapters today. I hope you like them!**

**I don't own Twilight or its original characters. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Eleven**

We are in Lilongwe, the capital of Malawi, stocking up on medical and educational supplies, and negotiating with the main hospital here to rotate medical staff into the new clinic. My legal skills have come in very handy and my father Carlisle is delighted when the contracts are signed. We will be leaving Malawi in three weeks and want to ensure that we have everything sorted out before we go.

I have another reason to be in Lilongwe. I have a letter to send.

I have written a letter to Bella every day since I had a heart-to-heart with my mother Esme a few weeks into our trip although the one in my hand is the only one I'm actually sending. In it I ask her to let me come see her, wherever in the world she may be. I can only hope that she emails me when she gets it. However, I don't actually know Bella's address in Hong Kong (she may not even still be there), so I send it to her care of Rosalie and Emmett in London, because Rosalie will undoubtedly know where to send it. I also write Rosalie and Emmett a letter (it seems cheeky to ask them to send a letter to Bella without sending them one too).

After a quick stop at an internet cafe to send a quick group email and update my Facebook with a couple of photos, we hit the road back to Nkhotakota, a fishing town on the banks of Lake Malawi. HIV and AIDS are rife in the area, and the local medical service is struggling to cope with the demand for care. We hope that the new clinic will take some of the pressure off by providing outreach care to the rural villages and much-needed medical education. The school will hopefully improve the prospects of local children, many of whom are orphaned or caring for HIV-riddled parents.

The work is hard and the poverty is heartbreaking, but each time a child smiles at me or a teenager shakes me by the hand, I heal just a little. _I am not a bad person just because I've made a few mistakes in my time. I can make a difference in this world._

-cc-

As soon as we return to England at the end of March, to our family home near the Worcestershire market town of Evesham, I check my email to see if Bella has sent me anything. She has not.

I am devastated.

I mope around the house for a week before deciding that reverting to my wallowing ways is pointless. I pick up the phone and call Emmett and Rosalie. They confirm that they received both letters but Rosalie nonchalantly tells me that she only put Bella's letter in the post that morning. It takes all my self-control not to yell at her.

After that, I check my email about 100 times a day, in between trying to decide what I'm going to do with the rest of my sabbatical. I'm tempted to go up to Leeds for a while. It's a great city, with plenty to keep me occupied, but much more relaxed than London. It would be great to see my old friends and to spend some time reacquainting myself with my interest in the law in the Leeds University library. I feel like I've lost sight of the reasons why I became a lawyer, and I know that if I'm to be happy in my career I have to find that love again.

Nearly two weeks after returning from Malawi, and three days after speaking to Emmett and Rosalie, I open my email inbox over the brunch Esme has made for me and almost spit out my coffee when I see an email from Bella, sent just half an hour earlier, at 6.30pm, her time.

_From: Isabella Swan_

_To: Edward Cullen_

_Subject: A reply to your letter_

_Dear Edward, _

_I only just got your letter today. Of course you can come to see me, if you still want to. You can come any time you like. I'm in Hong Kong until the end of June, and then I'm returning to Leeds._

_Bella xxx_

_PS: You're right. We do need to talk about what happened in Paris._

_PPS: I miss you too. So much. _

My heart soars and I actually whoop for joy. Esme comes running in from the garden and I show her the email. She hugs me tightly and asks me about my next move.

"I'm going to Hong Kong, Mum. As soon as possible."

"What, now? Shouldn't you email her back to arrange a convenient time to visit?" I shake my head.

"I can't wait to see her and God knows I've wasted too much time already. She said to visit any time I like. I'm taking that literally. I'm getting on the first flight out and I'll sit on her doorstep all weekend if I have to."

"Well, who knew my son could be so romantic?" She stands on her tiptoes and kisses my cheek. "Go pack. I'll just get changed and then I'll drive you to Heathrow. You can use your iPad to book flights and hotels on the way."

"Thank you Mum!" I run upstairs to pack. I have no idea how long I'm going to stay but I pack quite light (I'm an expert packer given how much I travel for work) so I don't have to check in any luggage- one suit, two pairs of jeans, two pairs of shorts, four t-shirts, two shirts, a week's worth of underwear, toiletries and a few other essentials. I can buy anything else out there or find a laundry service.

By the time my mother drops me off at Heathrow Airport just under three hours later I have managed to book myself onto an early evening flight, sorted out a hotel room in the Four Seasons in Hong Kong and a car transfer. Thank God for the internet and the iPad.

When we land at Hong Kong airport, I am rested thanks to my First Class seat, and less than an hour later I am in my elegant hotel suite. I shower, and change into a clean pair of jeans, grey-t-shirt and black jacket. My nerves are making my heart thrum and skip beats. I cannot wait to see Bella. I pull up the address of the VDI Hong Kong office on my phone, grab my wallet and hotel card key and head out.

I ask the concierge to book me a taxi but when I show him the address of the VDI Hong Kong office, he laughs and draws me a map on the back of a hotel compliments slip. It turns out that the office is only five minutes' walk away, on the other side of the IFC shopping mall adjacent to the hotel. _She is so close!_

Sure enough, five minutes later I am at VDI Hong Kong. I am glad that I had the foresight to bring my VDI London ID badge; although it won't give me full access, it does mean that I am allowed up to the VDI offices with no hassle from security. I approach the VDI reception, show my badge and ask for Isabella Swan. The silent elderly Chinese receptionist shows me to the desk of a petite but slightly dumpy Chinese woman who is in her mid-20s, on the edge of the open-plan office, who is typing rapidly on her keyboard.

She has a name plate on her desk.

_Mei-Ling Kwan_

_Personal Assistant to Isabella Swan_

_Acting Executive, Industry Division_

"May I help you sir?" She asks with an American-tinged Hong Kong accent, her eyes widening as she takes me in.

"I really hope so. I'd like to see Bella Swan please?"

"I don't have an appointment down on her schedule, Mr...?"

"I'm surprising her. I'm an old friend of hers from London. Believe me, I'm sure she'll be OK with it. And if she's not, you and I both know that she's such a nice person that she won't be mad at you."

"Um..." Mei-Ling looks torn. I beam at her, hoping it will encourage her to help me. It works. "OK." She picks up the phone and a few seconds later, I can just about make out Bella's sweet voice from Mei-Ling's receiver.

"_Yes Mei-Ling?"_

"Sorry to bother you Bella. You have a, um, visitor."

"_Who is it?" _

"He won't say his name. He says it's a surprise."

There is a pause and I suddenly feel the impulse to look behind me. I am so glad that I do because peering round the edge of a glass door is Bella. How is it possible that she looks so beautiful dressed so simply in a grey suit? I can't help but grin. She spots me and immediately breaks out into a huge smile before running towards me. I wait for her with open arms and when she is a couple of steps away she trips and lands right in my embrace.

"Bella." I pick her up and hold her against me, rocking her slightly. Her fruit-and-floral scent envelops me. It's better than I remember.

"Edward!" She sighs. Her breath warms the side of my neck and her lithe body warms mine as she wraps around me.

My whole soul feels like it has slotted back into place. I am home. With Bella is where I belong and judging by her reaction to seeing me, she might just feel the same way.

-cc-


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: And here's the second of two chapters for today. Hope you like it!**

**I don't own Twilight. I am just playing with Stephenie's characters.**

**-cc-**

**Twelve**

I am determined not to mess this up. I want it all with Bella. I want us to be best friends, lovers, partners, and parents together. For that reason I am standing my ground against my hormones, which are running wild at the thought of sex with Bella, the only girl who makes me so crazy with lust that I can barely see. But I don't want to rush into that part of our relationship. I'm very aware that although I know Bella very well as a friend, there are aspects of her of which I'm probably not aware, little quirks that only a boyfriend would have the privilege of knowing.

I want to get to know those quirks and I want her to get to know mine. And in order to do that, I need to hold off on the sexy part. She's making it bloody difficult though and my control is on a knife edge.

We've been having dinner in the Cantonese restaurant at the Four Seasons. The food is absolutely delectable, all the more so because Bella and I have been feeding each other little morsels all night quietly and discreetly at our corner table. I started it by offering her the last piece of shrimp during the starters, and things have escalated. I'm utterly fascinated by the way her mouth wraps around my chopsticks. It makes me imagine it wrapped around something else, and now that something else is hard as granite.

We have been chatting about plans for my time here. I am very glad that I booked a flexible return ticket because now that I'm here, with Bella, I don't want to be anywhere else. There's no way I'm going to be returning in a week. I'm intending to stay until she turns me away. Bella appears delighted to have me crash her trip to Macau, and we talk about visiting some of the highlights of Hong Kong.

The waiter clears our plates and brings us a pot of jasmine tea and a plate of tiny little cakes, chocolates and sweets. They look like edible jewels.

"So Bella, what are your plans for the weekend?" I ask, hoping that she says she's totally free to spend time with me. She glances up and down my torso, licks her lips and nibbles the corner of her bottom one sexily before replying.

"I didn't actually have anything fixed, so I'm um, all yours..." she says, her voice a little throaty and low. Suddenly I'm aware of Bella's warm, soft foot running up my calf, sending little shocks of delight straight to my groin.

"Fuuuck..." I moan. "Bella, you are going to be the death of me." I reach her ankle with my hand under the table and put her foot in my lap to run my fingers up and down her arches. It's a small movement but feels very intimate."You're making it very hard for me to implement my 'take things slow and woo Bella' plan."

"Edward, you have me, Handsome. We can do all those things, the walks under the moonlight, the dancing in each others' arms. You've spent the past eight years wooing me, you just didn't realise it." She says earnestly, holding my other hand.

"I just want to start this right, because I don't want it mess this up. I don't want to lose you. I _can't_ lose you." I tell her, desperate for her to understand why I'm imposing this sex-embargo on us, when both of us seem to clearly want to rip each others' clothes off.

"You won't." She takes a deep breath and shifts herself closer and presses her cheek to mine. Her strawberries and freesia smell invades me and I almost shiver at her warm touch. _ I am in love with this amazing woman._ "God, the way you make me feel, Edward...you set me on fire. But if you really need to take this slow, then that's what we'll do. Although I might spontaneously combust..." She says exactly what I feel. I brace myself and try to explain why I'm standing my ground against our mutual lust.

"I'm sure of how I feel about you Bella and I want to be with you so much, but as much as we know each other as friends, we don't know each other romantically. I think we need to let that part of our relationship develop too. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, it does." She pouts. It's the cutest thing. "Doesn't mean my hormones are happy about it though." I kiss her softly. I love her lips.

"Neither are mine, Gorgeous. Believe me." I steal another heady kiss. "Just give us a little time, OK."

"OK." She agrees, which simply confirms in my mind that she is perfect in every way.

-cc-


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: Hello, here's another chapter of Edward's POV. I hope you're still enjoying hearing from him. I'm a bit worried that everyone hates it because nobody's reviewing **

**Please let me know what you think!**

**I don't own Twilight. Clever Stephenie does.**

**-cc-**

**Thirteen**

Bella and I have been in Macau for the past three days. I am determined that we have the best trip ever. Last week whilst Bella was at work, I spent hours and hours researching things for us to see and do, and organised them into an itinerary. Part of the reason for it is to distract me from the fact that I am aching with desire for her.

Today we are on a walking tour of the historic centre of Macau. It's so beautiful, full of colourful colonial buildings and little squares- like being in Portugal or Italy, but with Chinese elements, and such a contrast to the huge, rather gaudy casinos that are also a part of life on Macau.

At the end of the tour Bella goes to find a restroom and whilst waiting for her I get chatting to the tour guide.

"So where are you and your wife going for dinner tonight?" He asks. I don't correct him about the 'wife' part. It's my intention to make her one day, hopefully not too far away.

"We're going to the MGM for their dinner buffet and then we might play some blackjack." I tell him. He's clearly disappointed with my answer and I don't blame him. It's not a particularly special way to spend the evening.

"If you have a better suggestion, especially if it's something more memorable or unique, I'd be very grateful."

"Well, there's this place on the beach..."

He fills me in on what sounds like an amazing restaurant and bar-club right on the beach. It's just the kind of quirky restaurant experience that Bella would love. The tour guide tells me that the club is a local secret and is full of people there to dance rather than hook up, so I might finally get to dance with the girl of my dreams.

By the time Bella returns from the restroom I know exactly where the place is, how to get there and have incorporated it into the itinerary, but I'm going to surprise Bella with it. I only hope she likes it. I also manage to call the hotel concierge to ask him to procure a bouquet of calla lilies for me to give to her.

For lunch, we return to the hotel, a charming little place that used to be a fortress, but is now a quiet sanctuary from the hustle and bustle of Macau. After lunch our itinerary has us going to a wine museum, something I'm really excited about, and I'm sure Bella will love too. However, when the time comes, Bella appears less than keen.

"But Bella, it's a wine museum! Doesn't that sound cool?"

"It does, Handsome, but I'm shattered. There's only so much sightseeing a girl can do! Can we see the Wine Museum tomorrow?" I feel instantly guilty. It seems that instead of impressing her, I'm exhausting her.

Of course, my darling." I kiss her in apology. "I'm sorry. I didn't realise I was wearing you out."

"That's OK. I love your enthusiasm but I just need a bit of down-time." She tells me.

"I understand. Do you think you'd still be up for going out tonight though? I had something special planned..." I ask, hoping she will still want to go out later. I really want to take her to the beachside restaurant and dance with her under the stars, but I want her to want to go too.

"Oh? I thought we were just going to the MGM tonight. Dinner buffet and blackjack tables, right?"

"Ah, no. The tour guide suggested another place to go which I thought sounded rather great."

"Where?"

"I want to keep it a surprise. Please?" I pout and blink at her, looking up from my eyelashes. My mother calls it my Eeyore face.

"All right." She agrees, grinning at my silly expression.

-cc-

I return to our room from the hotel bar at 7pm, after giving Bella an hour to get ready. It kills me that we have separate beds but I can't be trusted to keep my hands to myself when sharing a bed with her, as evidenced by what happened in Paris.

I knock on the door and wait with baited breath. She opens it a few seconds later, and absolutely takes my breath away. She is dressed in the sexy yet demure red dress she wore on my first night in Hong Kong when we went to the Cantonese restaurant. _God I want her. I want all of her. _In her shiny long hair is pinned one of the calla lilies I left in the room for her. I suddenly feel hot then cold then hot again and my stomach flutters with nerves. Somehow dinner tonight has morphed into an altogether more important night, but I don't really know how or why. I'm too blindsided by the waves of lust and love I feel towards this amazing creature on my arm.

We arrive around 10 minutes later. Bella is surprised when I direct her down to the beach but goes with it and is delighted by the sight of the wooden huts on the beach, one being the restaurant and the other the dance club. We make our way to the crowded bar area of the restaurant and Bella spots a table becoming vacant, so goes to claim it while I stand in line at the bar. Every now and then whilst waiting I look back to check on her. She appears serene, gazing at the water and the other people on the beach.

I'm about to be served when I turn around once again, but this time, _my_ Bella is being pawed at by some sleazy Chinese guy and I can see that she's annoyed and creeped out.

I see red.

She is recoiling away from him but he doesn't seem to be taking no for an answer. I push through the crowd of drinkers to get to the table as quickly as possible. No fucker is going to lay his hands on my girl and think he can get away with it. Just as I get there he starts waving US dollars in Bella's face and if it's even possible I get angrier still.

_How the fucking fuck can he mistake my gentle, decorous Bella for a hooker?_

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF MY GIRLFRIEND!" I yell, pulling Bella against my side and getting my shoulder in between him and Bella to get him to back off. "MINE!" I lean forward to use my height (I'm considerably taller than him) to intimidate. It works and he scurries away.

"Edward, I'm so sorry! He..." Bella begins but my need to make sure she's all right reigns supreme.

"Are you OK, my darling? Did he hurt you?" I ask frantically. She shakes her head and I relax just a little before enveloping her in my arms and holding her tight. Her head finds its nook in the crook of my neck and she stays there for a moment. When she lifts her face, I kiss her softly, desperate to feel her lips against mine. My heart is pounding against my ribcage but starts to calm when our lips meet.

"I saw him approach you but had to fight through the crowd to get to you. If he had, I swear to God I..." I start to explain.

"He didn't. I'm fine." She is trying to reassure me. Concern for me emanates from her and I feel a warmth run through me that I don't think I've ever felt before. _Is this what it feels like to be truly loved?_

A manageress comes over and offers us some beers on the house, apologising for the incident. Suddenly my anger flares again.

"You need to ban that guy from your restaurant! He can't go around propositioning women like that! He suggested that my girlfriend was a prostitute!" I exclaim, my anxiety levels climbing rapidly once more. I just can't cope with the thought that Bella could have been hurt.

"We will sir. Definitely." She leaves quickly and I don't blame her. When my temper gets going, I can be very daunting.

Bella seems to know exactly what I need. Her. She wraps around me and holds me tight, and I hold her back as tight as I can.

"Shh...Calm down Baby. It's OK." Bella whispers, desperately trying to soothe me. "He's gone. Let's enjoy our evening. Please? Please?"

I try to remember the deep breathing techniques Kachiri taught me and focus on them and Bella's warmth. It works and I manage to relax enough to explain to Bella.

"I'm sorry. I just saw red. When I get angry like that, and it doesn't happen very often, it takes me a little while to settle. But I'm OK now." I lean in to kiss her, and when I do, calm descends into my soul once more.

-cc-

After one of the most delicious meals possibly ever, I persuade Bella to let me take her for a turn on the dance floor at the club next door. Despite the fact that she is supremely confident in the boardroom, Bella is a naturally shy person who doesn't like to draw attention to herself, especially because she is not the most sure-footed person. She's kind of famous for being accident-prone. It makes her all the more endearing.

She lets me lead her to the dance floor and lets me hold her gently in my arms. We sway for a little while, and once again I feel the peace and calm I always feel when I am with her. Soon, however, I find myself wanting to actually _dance._ My mother made me have lessons and I have to admit, I'm pretty good.

Bella is actually quite amenable to the idea of being led through a few steps and of course, she's an absolute natural. I take her through a few simple modern jive sequences, and she picks them up instantly. Soon she is moving through a whole routine flawlessly, and appears to be really enjoying it. Seeing her step and twirl and dip under my guidance, feeling all her trust in me, makes me flush with love for her.

As fun as it would have been to continue jiving and teaching her more routines, the dance-floor is filling up fast and the music becomes more modern, faster and sexier. Bella instinctively changes the way she moves in time to the music, and moves closer to me. Our movements are smaller but with each one we rock and rub and wiggle against each other. She is getting me extremely hot and bothered, not to mention more than a little hard. Suddenly I find myself feeling nervous, really fucking nervous. I look down at her. She has her hands against my chest, and mine are on her hips. My knee is between her legs and she is rolling her hips over it as we move up and down together. Suddenly she looks up and those chocolate orbs of hers widen. Her cheeks redden and her mouth opens; she licks her lips a little. I feel like I'm piercing her soul and she is piercing mine.

I need her. I need to be inside her. We've waited long enough.

It's strange but I _know_ that Bella feels exactly the same way. Having missed so many signals from her about her feelings for me over the years, I now feel so in tune with her, much more so than any other woman with whom I've been in a relationship. She wants me too. Badly.

I sweep down to kiss her soft, slightly wet rosy lips and deepen it. She responds eagerly, sliding her hands up my chest to the back of my neck before tangling her fingers into my hair. It is her favourite way to hold me, and mine too. When we break apart, reluctantly, I say into her ear,

"Are you getting tired, Bella?"

"A little." She says, biting her lip. I wonder if she knows the effect that has on me. "Maybe we could dance one or two more songs and then go?"

"OK."

We resume dancing. It is delight and torture wrapped up in one, because Bella is so fucking sexy in my arms. The song changes after a minute or two to an old house track, one I haven't heard in years, called 'The Cure and The Cause.'

_Your sea it can be freezing, I thought I'd float  
I sink deeper blue, by you I'm consumed  
Oh I'm such a fool thinking I _

_Won't get caught in your downhill flow  
Swept away, what good is a beautiful day, I'm alone  
And you-ou, the cure and the cause  
Of my blues  
My only flaw_

Bella clearly likes it. She spins round so that she has her back to me and brings my arms around her waist. She then starts gyrating, no kidding, _gyrating, _against me, pressing herself against me. I think she might just be trying to kill me.

"Bella!" I kiss her long neck to show her how much she has affected me. "Your sexy ass is torturing me!"

She keeps moving against me but brings one of her hands back into my hair, pulling me even closer to her. I shove my dick into her ass to show just how hard I am for her. She shudders slightly but keeps moving until the end of the song.

"Shall we go?" She suggests. _Fuck, yeah!_

"Yes." I spin her so she is facing me and can't help but rake my eyes over her slender yet curvy figure. In a very short period of time, I intend to discover exactly what is under her red dress, and this time, I'm going to savour every moment.

-cc-

**AN: The song 'The Cure and the Cause' is by 'Fish Go Deep.' **

**Please do think about sparing a few moments to review. Each and every one keeps me motivated to work through my writer's block and keep going despite my horrendously busy real life.**


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: Hello everyone and welcome back to 'High Stays The Tide', the EPOV companion piece to 'The Tide is High.' Thanks to all of you who have been reviewing, following and adding me to favourites! I am very grateful for your support. **

**On with the story. **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Fourteen**

Bella Swan is a vixen. _My vixen._

And a sex goddess. _My sex goddess._

And an angel. _My angel._

And last night with her was the best sex I've ever had.

And I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with her.

And even if Bella one day tells me she doesn't want me, doesn't feel that way about me, I will never be able to love, or be with another. I would rather be alone. And that's a first for me.

I am in the bathroom of our hotel room, staring at myself in the mirror. I look the same but inside I am forever changed. Having spent the past couple of years in a fug plodding through the motions of work without enjoying it and keeping myself in a superficial relationship because of the fear of being lonely, I now have a much better idea of my priorities. And number one? Bella. Everything else pales in comparison. Especially my career. In fact I have made a decision.

I am not going back to London to finish my associate's contract.

The thought of getting back into the boardroom with the corporate rats and weasels, of working for Tanya Denali (she calls me her protégé but in reality, I'm her bitch) for another six months, of spending any time at all away from Bella, makes me feel sick to the stomach. I'm not going to tell Bella this yet because I need a bit of time to absorb it myself, and because my darling girl is so pragmatic that her first instinct will be to talk me out of it. When I do tell her, I want to be able to tell her what I'm going to do instead, and I have no idea right now.

I hear the rustle of sheets from beyond the bathroom door.

"Edward?" Bella calls, her voice a little sleepy.

"I'll be out soon Gorgeous!" I call back. I wash my face and rinse my mouth out with mouthwash before heading back into the bedroom.

She is such a beautiful sight to behold. She is reclining against the pillows, her hair in disarray, a dark halo around her exquisite face. One of the sheets is twisted around her torso covering most of her but leaving the top of one of her dusky pink nipples tantalisingly exposed. I hurry to climb in next to her and bring her closer to me.

"Hello." I whisper as I draw her into my arms. She giggles and gives me a very cute Eskimo kiss.

"Hi."

"Mmm...you taste delicious. Bella and coffee, two of my favourite things." I say after kissing her. I then kiss her again, deeper this time until we are fully making out.

"You too, Handsome!" She says when I let her come up for air. She grins wickedly, clutches my shoulder, pushes me onto my back and straddles me. She starts kissing my neck, and slowly works her way down my chest, licking and sucking my nipples for good measure. She moves down to by abs, and her warm hand clasps my throbbing, achingly hard cock, jolting me with white-hot pleasure and desire.

"God, Bella!" She smiles up at me before flicking her tongue across my happy trail. Suddenly I realise her intention, something that I love but so few girls I've been with have been willing to do. If it's possible I'm even more turned on by the thought of being in Bella's mouth.

"You don't have to...I mean...I would love it if you did but..."

She cuts me off by taking one of my balls into her mouth, and then the other, and then sucks them alternately. No girl has ever done that before and it feels so good that it takes everything I have not to come there and then. I grip the sheets under me and count in Italian to slow down my impending climax.

"You ok?" She whispers.

"Yeah...so good." I pant back.

She lets my balls go and moves to my cock which has been leaking torrentially. She kisses the head and licks up all the spillage, moaning slightly as she goes. She then purses her lips around me and takes me deeper. I have lost all coherent thought. I can't think of anything but the heat from Bella's mouth and the building tension in my groin. She is also pumping me with the hand at the base of my cock and working me further and further down her throat. I hit resistance and suddenly she sucks hard, sending delicious waves of sensation right through me.

"Holy fuck! Bella...!" My hands find her silky hair and I caress it away from her face to see her take me in and out of her mouth. She starts moving faster and faster and I stroke her hair in time to her movements. "Don't stop, please...!" She certainly isn't showing any sign of stopping and I am rapidly losing the battle to hold onto my climax. With one final suck and pump I explode hard inside her mouth and get an extra hit of pleasure as she swallows my seed down her throat.

See what I mean? Vixen and Sex Goddess.

She leaves me feeling like jelly and when I look back at her she looks like the cat that got the canary. She moves up the bed and rests her head on my abdomen. I keep caressing her hair and she uncurls, relaxing under my touch.

"You liked that, I take it?" Understatement of the millennium. She wriggles up into my arms and I turn us onto our sides.

"I'll say. What a great start to the day!"

"Speaking of which, what do you want to do today?" She asks.

"Other than fucking you senseless, you mean?" I laugh as I say it, but I'm serious. I want more.

"Other than that! What's on the itinerary?"

"What itinerary? I think it's been replaced with sex, sex and oh, more sex!"

"Sounds great to me, Handsome!" She kisses me hard and I know she wants more too. It seems that she has become as insatiable as me.

"Good." My lips get busy on her neck and she anchors her hand at the nape of my neck, clearly enjoying my touch. I cheekily move my hand down her back and squeeze her ass-cheek before sweeping round to her pussy, which I'm delighted to find, is hot and very wet for me. I instantly harden. Being with Bella has done wonders for my recovery time.

"Oh Gorgeous one..." Her eyes are blazing with desire and she is biting her lip. She wants me. She feels our bond as much as I do. Love overwhelms me as I prepare to give as good as she has given me, and then some.

-cc-


	15. Chapter 15

**AN: Hello and welcome back to 'High Stays The Tide!' I hope you're still finding it interesting having some EPOV! **

**The next post after this will be in two weeks because I'm working next weekend. **

**As ever I'd love to hear from you- let me know what you think!**

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did. Maybe then I wouldn't have to work on weekends! **

**-cc-**

**Fifteen**

Bella has taken to calling me 'Baby.' And 'Handsome.'

I absolutely adore the way her soft voice annunciates the words and the way she breathes my name as if it's always on the tip of her tongue.

Especially when we are making love.

We do that a lot.

All over Bella's apartment, where I am now staying, at her insistence.

In the swimming pool on the roof of her building (when it was just the two of us there of course- neither of us are into exhibitionism).

In the little law library at the VDI Hong Kong offices, against the bookshelves (I really hope there's no security camera in there).

We cannot keep our hands off each other.

I am more in love with her than I could ever have imagined. Although I haven't told her yet.

I wanted to be a better man for her, and I am, but she makes me feel like I could do anything at all.

A good example of this is cooking. I have always been shit at it. My mother tried to show me before I left for university, but in my teenage wisdom, I decided it was boring. I lived off take-away food, instant soup and sandwiches. Fuck-loads of them. It used to really bug Jessica when we lived together but when I tried it was a disaster and God knows she never had the patience to actually show me. It's so easy to eat well in London without cooking that I ended up not bothering.

But watching my Bella prepare a meal, even a simple one, is to watch an artist at work. I would sit at the breakfast bar of the open kitchen and we would chat whilst she cooked. I would look on, mesmerised by the way she held a knife and chopped herbs, or by the way she would mix ingredients together. After a few days, she noticed my interest and got me into the kitchen. Slowly, patiently, she would explain what she was doing, step by step, and most importantly, why each step was necessary. When I cooked my first dish all by myself, Bella was so happy and so _proud_. It was just pasta with spinach and spicy salami sausage, but it was a huge deal to me. To us.

That was two weeks ago and since then, my cooking's improved quite a lot, but the big thing that surprised both of us is how much I like baking. I don't do all the fancy decorating stuff but I can make a mean loaf of bread and a decent cake.

The teaching is not one-sided though. In exchange for cooking lessons, I am picking up from what we started in Macau and teaching Bella more dance steps. It's a joy because she's a natural dancer, although she doesn't believe me when I tell her.

Bella is working late tonight, so I decide to try to make dinner. It's a simple meal- chicken and vegetables stir-fried with garlic, a bit of chilli and some oyster sauce, and some rice. Every household in Hong Kong has a rice cooker so that bit's easy. I am really pleased with myself when it tastes virtually the same as Bella's version. She is tired and a little cranky when she comes home. She's had a long day reassuring her clients that their business will not fall apart when she returns to Leeds; they've become very attached to her. _I know the feeling_. Being greeted by a plate full of food and a foot rub goes down very well.

Bella is showing me how much she appreciates my efforts by wrapping herself around me on the sofa whilst we watch TV. She kisses my neck and my chest and then I tilt her chin up and kiss her perfect, pouty, pink lips. That, of course leads to a hot make-out session with me groping her ass whilst she runs one hand up my chest under my t-shirt and rubs her thumb over my nipple.

I am just about to move my hand from her ass up her back to undo her bra when my mobile starts ringing.

"Sorry, it's my Dad. I can call him later..."

"No, it's OK. I can go into another room." She starts to move away but I don't let her. I have nothing to hide from my love.

"Bella, my darling, there's nothing I'll tell him that I wouldn't want you to hear." I tell her before answering my phone.

"Hi Dad, how's things?"

"_Hello, son! Good thank you. Are you still in Hong Kong?" _Carlisle asks. It's been a couple of weeks since I spoke to either him or my mother, although I did email them a couple of times to tell them about getting together with Bella and how well things are going.

"Yes. I'm going to be here until the beginning of June." I'm still not ready to tell him that I don't want to return to London.

"_And how's your girl?"_ I look at Bella, who is curled right into my side, and kiss her cute nose.

"Bella's wonderful Dad. Beautiful. Exquisite." She goes a stunning shade of pink and I press my cheek against hers to feel the warmth.

"_Is she right next to you?" _ I laugh.

"Yes, but that doesn't make it any less true!" Carlisle laughs too.

"_May I speak to her?"_

"Umm..." I look back at her and she has gone from pink to red but she nods, so I hand her the phone and pray that my father doesn't embarrass me. As if he has read my mind, he adds,

"_I promise I won't be too embarrassing!"_

"OK Dad...here she is." I pass the phone over.

"Um, hello? This is Bella."

"_Hello, dear. It's so nice to finally talk to you after hearing all about you."_

"Thank you Dr Cullen. It's good to talk to you too."

"_Please call me Carlisle, Bella! I hope our Edward isn't making too much of a nuisance of himself."_

"No, he's great. I'm so happy to have him here." She links her spare hand with mine and squeezes it.

"_Do you think you could cope with two more Cullens for a few days?"_

"Are you coming this way?" What? Bella and I exchange looks. I really want Bella to meet my parents but this might be too soon for her.

"_I've been invited to speak at a surgical conference in Singapore. It's all happened rather last-minute. We thought about stopping in Hong Kong next weekend before flying on but if it's an imposition..."_

"Not at all! It would be an honour to meet you and Mrs Cullen." She replies and once again my heart fills up with love. I can't help but grin. I quickly take the phone from her and put it onto speaker so that we can have a three-way conversation.

"Dad, that would be great! I can't wait for you to meet my Bella!"

Once we have sorted flights and hotels with my father, we hang up the phone and I lead Bella to the bedroom where we pick up our make-out session, and it quickly leads to a very hot-and-heavy sex-session. Once we are sated and collapsed in a sweaty heap, I pull the sheets out from under us. She lies on her side and I spoon her as we prepare to drift off to sleep.

"What if they don't like me?" Bella suddenly asks in a small voice.

"Who, my parents?" I check.

"Yes."

"Bella, they'll love you. I know it." I tell her, dropping a kiss on her shoulder. She turns around to face me.

"How did they get on with Victoria, Jessica and Heidi?" I have to suppress a shiver at the thought of my last three girlfriends. All of them were mistakes I don't want to remember. "What?" She asks. I must be grimacing.

"Nothing. I just don't want to think about my exes." I tell her honestly. She's got that determined look on her face. I know it well. She's not going to let this go so I might as well answer. "Well, Dad didn't seem to have any strong feeling about any of them."

"And your mother?" She persists.

"Well, she liked Jessica, but found her incessant chatter a bit annoying. Victoria she only met once, briefly, and Heidi...Heidi she detested with a passion. She was delighted when we split up."

"Oh, God, she's going to hate me!" What? I don't know how Bella has decided that because Esme hated Heidi, she'll hate her too. They are so very different.

"Bella, she's not!" I exclaim. "She hated Heidi because she was such a pain in the ass with all her food fads and insistence on bringing her Chihuahua everywhere..." God, I hated that mutt. "...and taking three hours to get ready for a walk etc, but most of all she knew, before I knew, that Heidi made me didn't really make me happy. She's so excited to meet you because I spent the whole of our time in Malawi talking about how wonderful you are and how happy I always feel when I'm with you." I blurt out in a long spiel.

Bella seems a little assuaged but also a little sceptical.

"Mmm...any tips for ingratiating myself?"

"Just be yourself. She hates superficiality and fakery. Although she would always be very polite. And with Dad, he'll appreciate any discussion on politics and world affairs, which I know you love too."

"OK." I start to reach up to turn the light off but it seems Bella is not done talking. "Why did you stay with her?"

"What, with Heidi?"

"Yeah. Why did you stay for so long if you were miserable? Why did you propose? Come to think of it, why did you stay with Jessica?" Damn, I've been dreading this topic coming up. It's just going to prove to Bella what a shithead I am and that she deserves better. I sit up.

"You want to have this conversation now?" I ask inanely. _She wouldn't have brought it up otherwise, you idiot!_

"Yes. I think it's important."

"OK. I just don't want you to think less of me when I'm done." She kisses me gently to soothe me.

"I won't. I just need to understand if we're going to move forward in our relationship."

She's right of course. If I want forever with Bella, I am at some point going to have to reveal my ghosts. Might as well start now.

So we talk. I tell her about why I've always hated being without a girlfriend and she is very understanding. We then discuss our various misunderstandings over the years. I find out that she only had one proper date with Jasper before he fell in love with Alice, and that the Riley guy Jessica told me about was also insignificant. I can't believe that there have been so many times when we have each come close to saying how we feel only to have our plans scuppered.

"It's been eight years of near misses with us hasn't it?" Bella comments, as if reading my mind.

"Yeah. But I finally have you, don't I?" I reply.

"Yes, Baby, you do." She leans up and gives me lots of small, warm kisses all over my face. Each one feels full of love.

"Bella, my darling. Heidi made me miserable because she wasn't you. That's the simple answer." I tell her.

"I'm sorry Edward. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have opened the can of worms." She says, full of unnecessary remorse. She brings herself up to meet my eyes straight-on and throws her arms around her neck. "The fact is, no guy I've ever been with has ever compared to you." _How does she always know the right thing to say?_

"No, we needed to talk it through. I needed to make you see that ever since I met you, despite the other girls, my heart has been yours. I stayed with them for the wrong reasons, but I'm with you for the right one." She relaxes and I see tiredness sweep through her.

"Mmm...and what's that?" She asks, sleep creeping into her voice.

"Because I love you. I am in love with you, my darling Gorgeous Bella. You're the other half of my whole being. And that will _never_ change." I tell her earnestly. It might be too soon for her to say it back, but I need her to know that that's how I feel.

Bella sits up fast, suddenly alert again. She inhales and presses her forehead to mine. My breath catches in my throat as I take in the emotion in her eyes. She is my soulmate, my other half. I know in that moment, if I ever doubted it before, that I cannot live without her.

"Edward, my handsome, beautiful Edward. I love you too. I am _so_ in love with you."

I kiss her with every ounce of passion I possess. She loves me. If that is the only thing I have in this life, I'm still the wealthiest man in the world.

-cc-


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Hello! Thanks for stopping by to read Edward's POV. Big special thanks to those of you who have reviewed!**

**I don't own Twilight. If I did, I'd be rich!**

**-cc-**

**Sixteen**

My parents absolutely adore Bella, of course. She completely beguiled and charmed them last night just by being her wonderful self. She debated politics with Carlisle effortlessly and tapped into Esme's love of antiques and interior design by talking about her plans to renovate her apartment in Rome. When she was in the ladies' room, my parents could hardly contain their excitement.

"Edward, son, that girl is perfect for you." My father had said.

"Would it freak you out to tell you that I'm already imagining what your children would look like?" My mother had asked, beaming from ear to ear. I didn't tell her that I had done the same, many times.

Bella further ingratiated herself with my mother when she offered to take her out to Stanley this morning, home of one of the most famous markets in Hong Kong, and to the beach. She then suggested that I organise to play golf with my father at Deep Water Bay via the hotel concierge, unaware that golf was one of my father's favourite pastimes, but because he was always so busy with work, rarely got to play. Carlisle was delighted.

I have just woken up. Bella is not next to me but I can hear her distantly, pottering around in the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee tickles my nose and I leap out of bed, throw on some shorts, quickly go for a pee and then go find my beautiful girl.

She is softly singing along to an Adele track on the radio whilst she whisks together what looks like pancake batter. I creep up behind her, wrap my arms around her waist and kiss her shoulder, causing her to jump and drop the whisk into the mixing bowl.

"Morning Handsome!" She turns around and places her hands on my chest before nipping at my bottom lip. She is wearing only a pair of teeny-tiny black panties and the white lacy camisole that has featured in so many of my fantasies about her.

"Morning, Gorgeous!" I tilt her chin up with one finger and caress her pink lips with my thumb. She puckers her lips and kisses the pad of my thumb softly. Arousal for her floods me, and grows as she takes my thumb into her mouth and sucks lightly. "Whoa..." I say under my breath.

I use my other hand to pull out the hair tie that holds her long chestnut mane in a knot on top of her head so that her hair tumbles down around her shoulders in large waves, and the air is filled momentarily with the smell of her strawberry shampoo. I lock eyes with her and suddenly I have pulled out my thumb and am devouring her mouth feverishly, slipping my tongue inside, desperate to savour her delectable taste. My hands anchor her head close to mine, tangling her locks in my fingers. Bella and I often joke about how we are obsessed with the other's hair, and sure enough, she reciprocates by running her fingers into mine, scratching my scalp in the way I love.

I am pressing against her and she is rubbing against me, our mutual need for friction riding high. I let go of her hair momentarily and hold her hips, pushing up slightly to coax her to sit on the kitchen counter. She needs very little encouragement and hops up, immediately widening her legs and wrapping them around me before pulling me closer with them so that my hard-on is jabbing at her hot centre through those tiny panties. I swiftly attack her long, elegant neck with my lips and run my hands down her chest to free her beautiful breasts from their lacy prison.

"Aah!" She gasps in surprise as I tease her already-hard peaks and press my cock harder towards her centre.

"Like that, Gorgeous?" I ask before doing it again.

"Ah! God, yes!"

"Tell me, Bella. Tell me Gorgeous. What do you want me to do to you?" I ask her before bringing my mouth to her nipples, flickering my tongue around each one in turn.

"That's good, Edward." She pants. "So good Baby!"

"Yeah?" I gently bite at her teat and creep my hand downwards, desperate to feel her slick, wet heat against my fingers.

"Ah! Fuck! Yeah" She screams. I slide my fingers just under her panties but don't go any further.

"Tell me, Gorgeous." I repeat.

"Finger me, Handsome, then taste me!" I love it when she tells me what she wants. Although she is not shy when it comes to sex, she has taken some encouragement over dirty talk, as she still feels embarrassed at times, but I'm gradually working that out of her.

"Do you want to feel my tongue against your clit?" She nods. "Say it Gorgeous Girl."

"Yes! Edward, please! I want you to suck my clit, fuck me with your tongue and then fuck me good and proper! Please Handsome!" Yes! She's got it. When she talks dirty, it turns me on beyond belief!

"Your wish is my command, Bella, my love." I step out of the circle her legs have created around me and ease her panties (which are nice and moist) down her legs. I crouch down and kiss her ankles before kissing my way up her right leg until my lips are hovering over her pussy lips. She is writhing around and I can see her arousal; she is absolutely dripping with want. I throw her leg over my shoulder and gently rub my finger along her sensitive slit.

"Jesus! Fuck!" She tugs at my hair frantically. "Don't you dare stop, Handsome!" I don't intend to. I delve further, savouring the smell of her arousal and the way her warm wetness feels against my fingers- like silk or satin. I use my thumb to rub against her clit and two of my fingers to finger-fuck her. I glance up at her face. She has thrown her head back and is moaning softly, and is gnawing at the corner of her bottom lip. God, she looks so unbelievably sexy.

"Enjoying that Gorgeous?" I ask her.

"Mmm-hmm." She replies before opening her eyes and piercing me with them. _Damn, those Bambi-eyes get me each and every time._ "Yes I am, although I am wondering if your tongue's going to do something sometime soon..." she adds, flushing slightly.

"What, like this?" I move my thumb and blow gently on her clitoris, before circling it with the tip if my tongue.

"Yes! Yes! More!" She cries and I oblige, fucking her with my fingers in and out whilst circling her clit with my tongue and occasionally sucking it with my lips. Her moans increase in volume and she is now pressing the back of my head, trying to get my face closer to her pussy. I swap my fingers and tongue so that I'm moving my tongue in and out whilst pressing her clit with my thumb. She tastes unbelievably delicious, and I love the fact that my face is now covered with her juices.

"Keep going Baby, I'm so close." Her thighs clamp around my head and she is squirming and thrashing about. "Edward! EDWARD! FU-U-UCK! Suddenly I feel her walls spasm around my tongue as she finds her release.

I stand up, which is actually difficult because I'm so painfully hard. Bella pulls off her top and pulls me towards her, and winds herself around me so that we are skin to skin.

"Enjoy that?"

"Fucking A-Mazing, my handsome Edward." She tells me, tucking her head under my chin. I pick up her top and wipe my mouth of her juices before tip up her face to kiss her.

"Good." I kiss her again.

"Your turn, Baby." She runs her hand down into my shorts and takes hold of my cock. I can't help but groan. "How do you feel about fucking me over this counter?"

"I...uh..." she rubs her thumb over the head of my dick and it seriously affects my ability to speak. "...yes, Gorgeous!"

"Good." She lets go of my cock, lets go of me and turns round before sticking her glorious peachy ass up, ready for me to enter her. I don't hesitate and slide in easily because she is still so wet.

"Oh holy fuck! You feel so good, Bella, my darling." Shit, I am not going to last long.

"Ride me, Handsome!"

I did exactly as I was told. I move in and out of her heat rapidly, and desperately try to delay the urge to just come already, which is a struggle because her tight heat feels so damn wonderful.

"Oh Gorgeous, I'm really close to the edge." I move one hand to her clit and rub her once again.

"Me too Handsome. Just...keep...on...please!" I kiss her back between her shoulder-blades by way of an answer and continue to tap her clit whilst thrusting in and out of her, faster and faster and faster.

"Bella...my love...my darling...my...my...Gorgeous Girl! " I suddenly come really bloody hard, deep inside her. I keep rubbing and she follows me in a quieter but no less powerful orgasm of her own.

Fuck! Sex with Bella is the hottest sex ever, way beyond my imagination.

"Wow! Edward, I can't begin to tell you how good that felt!" She turns around in my arms and kisses me softly.

"Right back at you Gorgeous!" I look round at the scene of our passion. The kitchen is decimated. The fruit bowl is on the floor, coffee has spilled from Bella's cup across the work-surface and both of us are splattered with pancake batter from the whisk which has fallen out of the mixing bowl.

"Damn, what a mess! I don't even remember us making it!" Bella says.

"I guess we better get cleaned up...together?" I suggest, hoping for round two in the shower. Bella nods enthusiastically. Yet another reason why I love her so much.

-cc-

"Oh dear, Edward!" My father exclaims as I hit one into the bunker yet again. "I haven't beaten you since you were fourteen!" He adds, a little too enthusiastically. I'm usually quite competitive but I've just been going through the motions today. My mind is still replaying my early morning sex-fest with Bella, and my body is feeling the effects of the exertion followed by 18 holes of golf in the Hong Kong heat. Still, despite my lack of form, I have really enjoyed spending the afternoon with my father.

"Well, Dad I am rather rusty. Don't get used to it. I'll trounce you next time!" I reply jokingly before going to the bunker to hit the ball back onto the green. It takes me three attempts and another three to get the ball into the damn hole, but finally we are done.

Carlisle and I head back to the hotel. We change into our swimming things and head to the hotel pool. Surprisingly for a Saturday afternoon, it's not that busy and we manage to save four lounge chairs in a row. Bella texts me to say that she and my mother have had a successful day trip and will join us at the pool within the next hour, depending on the traffic back from Stanley. Before I can tell my father, my mother sends me a message herself, moments later.

_Bella is fantastic! I love her! LOVE HER!_

I smile broadly. Esme's true approval is not won easily. She is very protective of me, her only child, and of our small family of three. Ever since I started dating girls, age fourteen, she has worried about who I will bring home and how our little family will be affected. I wonder what Bella has done or said in Stanley to cause Esme to exclaim her adoration so pointedly.

"What's with the big grin, son?" Carlisle asks as he hands me a Mojito. He is drinking his usual cocktail, a Moscow Mule.

"Oh, just Mum." I show him the text message from Esme. "She and Bella are on their way back from Stanley. They'll be here within the next hour."

"I have to say I'm not surprised. Bella's wonderful, Edward. Smart, funny, beautiful and she quite clearly loves you deeply." He said. "She reminds me of your mother in some ways. Gentle, elegant and utterly unaware of how endearing she is." My father replies before taking a sip of his drink.

"I can't believe how lucky I am, Dad." I take a deep breath. "I didn't know it was possible to love someone so much, or to feel so loved by another."

"Do you see what we've been trying to show you for so many years? That you, my son, deserve to have the love of your life rather than languishing in unfulfilling relationships?"

I nod gravely. I'm still not convinced I deserve Bella, but she's mine now and I won't give her up without a fight.

"I see the difference Dad. I _feel_ the difference." I tell him. "She's become my whole world."

My father looks up at me curiously.

"What's going to happen when you have to go back to London? How are you going to handle the distance? Speaking of which, when do you go back?"

_Shit. Big stinking shit._

I'm not sure my straight-laced, do-everything-by-the-book father will understand if I tell him that I'm on the point of quitting Volturi, Denali and Ireland, one of the biggest corporate law firms in the world, because I don't want to be apart from my girlfriend. But I would rather be unemployed than spend a moment away from Bella, and I don't think I can face going back into the world of Financial corporate law in the way Tanya Denali wants. It feels like a violation of my soul.

"Edward?"

"Dad, I don't want you to freak out about what I'm about to tell you..."

"What?" He asks, his tone wary.

"Um, I'm not going back to London." I tell him in a quiet voice.

"Sorry?"

"I'm not going back. Not without Bella."

Carlisle is silent for a moment, his eyes widening at my statement.

"Son, are you telling me that you're leaving your job?"

"Um, yes, I believe so."

"What does Bella have to say about this?"

"She doesn't know yet."

"Look, Edward, I know you're in love with Bella, but quitting VDI just for the sake of being with her all the time? Isn't that a bit extreme?"

"No. Dad, I can't live without her!"

"And nobody's asking you to! But quitting before the end of your associate's contract- isn't that essentially career suicide? You're normally so responsible, Son. This feels out of character for you."

"I'll find something else to do. Dad, Bella's the catalyst to me deciding to leave, not the reason. I was miserable in London, working in Financial Law. The thought of going back there makes me feel sick, panicky like just after the motorbike accident."

"Son, it would only be for six months and then you would have so many more opportunities to change divisions or firms. Nobody will hire you if you haven't completed your associate's contract. You don't need me to tell you this. And it's not fair on Bella either. She's your partner, your other half. She needs to be involved in this decision."

I am getting quite frustrated. I expected that he would have something to say, but it's hard to hear. I run my hand through my hair.

"But Dad..." I was starting to sound like a whiny teenager. "...I don't want to tell her until I have a plan lined up."

"Edward, Bella loves you and will want the best for you. She will probably have her own ideas about what she wants to happen next. It's not fair on her for you to make this big decision without her." He is hitting me where it hurts. I hadn't considered Bella's ideas at all and suddenly feel really selfish.

"Dad...!"

"Son, you need to tell Bella what you're thinking. It's her future too!" He exclaims. "I'm not saying you have to stay in Finance or even at VDI in the long-term but don't rush into this just for the sake of six months of having a long-distance relationship, and you definitely need to talk to Bella."

I am silent and the air is thick with tension between us. It is interrupted by the sound of my sweet Bella's voice.

"Hey." She parks herself next to me and kisses me. She is wearing a simple black swimsuit and a sunhat that makes her look like a 1950s movie star. "Everything ok?" My father gives me a glance as if to say _'Tell her.'_ I start to explain but something stops me. "Edward?" She presses.

"Everything's fine, my darling." I hold her hand and smile at her. She looks at Carlisle and back at me, as does my mother.

"I'll get us some drinks." Bella stands up. "Edward, will you help me?"

I can tell from the look on my beloved's face that she does not believe me for one second. _I am in big trouble._

-cc-


	17. Chapter 17

**AN: Hi all. Thanks for stopping by. I hope you're enjoying these extra snapshots into Edward's mind. **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Seventeen**

Bella has gone to work and left me in bed. I normally get up with her but I'm exhausted. This weekend was quite stressful. Bella and I came close to having a fight on Saturday night. She was unhappy that I put myself down and put her 'on a pedestal.' I never realised that I was doing it, but my beautiful girlfriend had a point.

I hate to admit it but Bella isn't perfect. She is stubborn and she has workaholic tendencies. She, like me, is guilty of not believing in herself, except for her, it is the belief that she is beautiful and attractive that she struggles with. The important thing is that she is perfect _for me_.

Bella agrees that it will be too hard for us to be apart. She doesn't agree with my plan to quit VDI though and I know she has spent the past 36 hours trying to think of a solution. I don't think she's come up with anything so far, and I definitely haven't.

I am just contemplating getting up when my phone buzzes with a text.

_Hi Handsome! So sorry but I'm going to miss meeting you for lunch- Aro and Marcus Volturi paying us surprise visit this afternoon. Need to prepare case presentation. Meet me after work? Love you Baby xxx_

I text her back to say that's fine although I do feel a flutter of disappointment. If I could I'd spend 24/7 with her. I get up, have a long shower and after twiddling my thumbs for a while in the apartment, grab my laptop and workbag (both new purchases since being in Hong Kong) and head to the IFC Mall to have lunch before putting in a couple of hours of work at the VDI library.

The library is absolutely dead. Usually when I am there in the afternoons there's one or two others drifting in and out but today, nobody. I guess all the staff members are in the main office because of the Volturis' visit. It's good for me and my concentration though. I pull out a couple of law journals, set my laptop up, put my iPod on and get to work.

After an hour, I need the loo so leave the desk for a couple of minutes. When I return, humming along to MGMT on the iPod, I am surprised by a whole bunch of people around the desk that I am using. My eyes find Bella first, who has gone slightly pink. I also recognise her colleague Sam Uley. Amongst the others I recognise Aro and Marcus Volturi from their pictures on the VDI website.

"Oh! Um..."

"Signor Aro and Signor Marcus Volturi, this is Edward Cullen, a visiting associate from the London City office. Edward, this is Aro and Marcus Volturi." Bella introduces politely.

"Edward Cullen? Ah, you work for Tanya, don't you? Finance division?" Marcus says, smiling warmly. The other Volturi, Aro, just looks at me curiously.

"Yes. Although I'm currently on sabbatical until mid-June, _Signore." _I reply.

"Aha!" Aro suddenly cries. "_Quindi questo è il tuo fidanzato!" _ He says to Bella. I smile warmly at him and then my Bella. I'm not sure how he knows this, but everyone in the VDI Hong Kong office knows we're a couple, so there's no point in denying it. I come round to Bella and hold her by the waist. She automatically moulds herself to me.

"_Sì, Signore. Lei è la mia fidanzata e l'amore della mia vita."_ I tell him. I can tell he finds my Bella intriguing and attractive, but I hope he realises that she is mine and that he has no chance.

"_Mio Dio_! Does everyone speak Italian around here?" Aro exclaims. Everyone laughs. _He gets my drift._

"Just Edward and me." Bella says.

"So, Edward, we were just commenting on your reading material. Academic law interests you?" Marcus asks me.

"Yes. Very much."

"It is one of Aro's interests as well."

"Is it _Signore_?"

"Yes, very much. " Aro agrees. "I would be very interested to discuss our common interest with you further!" He adds excitedly.

"Why don't you all join us for dinner? We are going to Le Caprice tonight." Marcus suggests.

"_Sì! Buona idea, mio fratello!"_ Aro exclaims, clapping his hands.

"Of course! We will be there!" Bella replies. _Well, this should be interesting._

-cc-

Dinner with Aro and Marcus was an unprecedented success. Aro and I, it turns out, share a lot of similar ideas about the direction in which law research and teaching should go. Bella almost had to drag me home, long after the restaurant was supposed to have closed. It has made me doubt my decision to leave VDI, but at the same time I am resolved that I will not live apart from my Bella.

We are still no closer to a solution and it's been four days since dinner with Aro. I am pounding my frustrations into a big ball of pizza dough and waiting for Bella to come home from her late meeting when my mobile rings. It is from a blocked number. I quickly wipe my hands and pick up the call.

"Hello?"

"_Ciao, Edward? Edward Cullen?" _A female voice in an Italian accent asks.

"Si?" I reply.

"_Aro Volturi vuole parlare con voi." _Aro Volturi wants to talk to me? Before I can say anything, Aro is on the line.

"_Ciao Edward and greetings from Kuala Lumpur! Is now a good time to speak?" _He asks in his slightly high-pitched yet commanding voice.

"Of course, _Signore_." I reply, intrigued.

"_Edward, I have been doing some thinking and I have decided something. I would like to work with you."_

"Thank you. It would be an honour to work with you, but..." He didn't let me finish my sentence.

"_I know you are in a contract with Tanya's office in London to finish your associateship, but if that wasn't an issue, where would you like to be?"_

"Wherever Bella is, sir." I state honestly. There is silence on the line for a moment.

"_Hmm, this is what _I_ would like..."_ He pauses, causing my curiosity to increase further. "_I want you to work with me in Roma. You could do a token amount of financial law work but I would like to see you work with me and my wife on some projects to innovate teaching methods. What do you think?"_

I think that that is exactly the kind of thing I would love to do.

"I love the sound of it, _Signore, _but I am still tied into the contract with Miss Denali's team and there is Bella to consider. Her post will be taking her back to England in a few weeks, and I will not live apart from her."

Another silence.

"_Well, Tanya is not a problem. Do not worry about that. But talk to Isabella. Maybe something can be worked out."_

"Of course I will, _Signore."_

"_Good. Now I must go. It is time for cocktails. Ciao!"_

"Ciao." The line goes dead.

I return to the pizza dough and whilst shaping it into two pizzas for our dinner, try to absorb what just happened and try to come up with some way, any way, to make Aro's job offer work without disrupting Bella's ascent up the VDI ladder. I have just put them in the oven when my phone rings again, from another blocked number. _Well I'm certainly popular today. _I quickly set the timer on the oven so the pizzas don't burn and pick up the call.

"Hello?"

"_Edward?" _It's Tanya Denali. _Shit. _I move out to the balcony because I need some fresh air, although it's pretty warm outside too.

"Hi Miss Denali, how are you?"

"_Hmm." _That's not a good 'Hmm.' _"Have you had a phone call from Aro Volturi at all recently?"_

"Yes, around half an hour ago."

"_Is it true you're in Hong Kong?"_

"Yes. I've been here for a few weeks."

"_Staying with your 'fidanzata' as Aro and Marcus call her?"_ There is a distinct hint of sneer in her tone. Suddenly I wonder if Bella is right about Tanya Denali having a soft spot for me.

"That's right."

"_I am guessing that 'Isabella' is Isabella Swan?_"

"Right again."

"_I should have known." _She says. I have no idea what she means by that. "_Did Aro make you a job offer?"_

"Yes, to work with him in Rome."

"_Son of a bitch!" _She yells. "_I asked him specifically to wait until you'd finished your contract! But no, Aro doesn't give a shit about any kind of courtesy! When he wants something, he wants it now! Bastard! He's pulling his founding partner card to take you away from my team!" _ She rants. "_Are you going to take him up on it?"_

"It's very tempting, but I don't know..."

"_You don't want to work in Rome?" _ I hear the hope in her voice.

"No, it's not as simple as that." I'm getting quite anxious and my ability to articulate has reduced as a result.

"_No?"_

"There are other factors I need to consider..."

I glanced into the apartment to see my Bella, changed out of her work clothes and in a pair of shorts (God I love her legs!), looking at me curiously. I blow her a kiss and mouth that I'll be there in a minute. She nods and sits down on the sofa.

"_Like Bella?" _She asks and I choose not to respond to that one. "_Edward, answer me this. Did you ask Aro to make you an offer?" _

"No, I didn't ask him to make me the offer, but you know that I wasn't that happy in London before my sabbatical."

"_No, but I thought we made a good team! Now I find that all along you wanted to work for him!" _ Tanya Denali is starting to sound like a moaning teenager and I am starting to get just a bit annoyed.

"As I said, it's not as simple as do I want to work for you, do I want to work for him."

"_So what have you decided?"_

"I'll let you know when I know."

"_What? That's not really an answer, Edward."_

"Yes I'm aware that I'm being vague." She sighs down the phone.

"_We're not getting anywhere are we? Just call me when you've made a decision. Bear in mind that if you choose an academic post with Aro, you won't make bonuses."_ That really doesn't bother me. VDI's basic salaries are still very generous.

"OK, I'll talk to you again on Monday or Tuesday. Bye Miss Denali." She puts the phone down on me without saying 'Bye.'"

I walk back into the apartment and lie on the sofa with my head in Bella's lap. She scratches my scalp and plays with my hair in the way I love. Could I live anywhere without coming home to her, for six months?

No. Never.

We need some sort of intervention. Divine or otherwise.

-cc-

**AN: Here are translations of the Italian in the text. **

_Quindi questo è il tuo fidanzato!"_ (So this is your boyfriend!)

"_Sì, Signore. Lei è la mia fidanzata e l'amore della mia vita." _(Yes Sir. She is my girlfriend and the love of my life.)

"_Mio Dio_!" (My God!)

"_Sì! Buona idea, mio fratello!" _(Yes! Good idea, my brother.)

_Fidanzato/fidanzata _(boyfriend/girlfriend or fiancé/fiancée)

"_Aro Volturi vuole parlare con voi." _(Aro Volturi would like to speak with you.)

**Please consider leaving a review.**

**-cc-**


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: And here's the second of two chapters I'm posting today. It features my first guest POV, because Edward's POV is featured in the main story but it didn't feel right for Bella to be featuring here. I'd love to know what you think. **

**I don't own Twilight. Clever Stephenie!**

**-cc-**

**Eighteen**

**Emmett**

Rosie and I are beyond excited to be in Rome to see my best pal Edward and his girlfriend Bella, who is one of my Rosie's best friends. It's Bella's 30th birthday and we are surprising her, along with her other friends. It's gonna be weird seeing 'Dward and Bell together as a couple even though both of us agree that they are perfect together. They danced around each other for years, went out with other people. Edward was even stupid enough to propose to that bitch Heidi even though they were only engaged for like, a month.

See, the thing about Edward is that he's a bit of a martyr. He makes himself suffer for the things he wants. He tortures and agonises over doing the right thing when most of the time, the right thing is the thing he wants. He's always been that way. Serious, responsible, geeky and a bit awkward in his own skin.

Edward and I grew up together. Our parents are best friends and our mums were pregnant at the same time. I was born a week before he was. Edward's parents Carlisle and Esme wanted a whole brood of kids but Aunt Es had problems conceiving after him so he was an only child. Me on the other hand, I was always trying to get away from my siblings. I'm the youngest of four and my brother and sisters are bat-shit crazy. I used to hang out at the Cullens' all the time. Edward had his own music room, his own games room and his own gym, (although he's never ever acted spoiled). Plus, Aunt Es is a great cook.

I never struggled chatting to people and always had loads of friends at school. Edward was shy and quiet. He was never really bullied but he found it hard to get close to people. Apart from me he only had one or two real friends. When we started getting interested in girls, he found it really hard to ask them out and would get super-nervous. It didn't help that he went through that skinny, spotty, greasy-haired phase for a year or two. Poor 'Dward didn't have a chance.

Teenage girls can be right bitchy; they were cruel when they turned him down for dates and called him every name under the sun. He persevered but his confidence dwindled with each knock-back. When we were fourteen or fifteen, Edward eventually started going out with Zafrina, a sexy, quite fearsome South African girl with braids and flawless dark skin and the biggest ass I've ever seen. It was re-donk-ul-ous! Edward is a total ass-man. Also she didn't take any shit, another quality Edward loves. He's into strong women.

Zaf dumped him after a few months and he was gutted. He begged and pleaded her to reconsider but she just said that it wasn't him, it was her. He sat on her doorstep for days until her father threatened to beat him black and blue. I bumped into her in a bar in Soho a couple of years ago actually. She's a lesbian, been with her life partner for at least ten years. Turns out that being with Edward made her realise that she was into girls. I haven't told him that. I don't think it would be good for him.

All of a sudden, when we were sixteen, he filled out, lost the spots and became the handsome dude he is today. He started going out with Chelsea. She was super-fit but a complete bitch. She walked all over him and he just took it because he was so chuffed to have a girlfriend again. He didn't feel lonely anymore.

When we were seventeen, Edward begged for and got a motorcycle and riding lessons for his birthday. Chelsea put the idea in his head, telling him that men on bikes were sexy and strong and she wanted a boyfriend who could ride. He was actually pretty good and passed his test easily. Things were going well for him. He was happy with Chelsea (even if she was a cow), he was doing well at school and was applying to go to Cambridge the following year.

One Saturday night, just after the New Year, Edward and I were bored. The weather was shit, there had been a power cut and both our families were out. Chelsea was busy with her girl-friends and my girlfriend was in France on holiday. After an hour of messing around at Edward's house, he suggested we go for a ride on the bike. Carlisle had told him not to because of the weather but Edward was confident we'd be OK because it had stopped raining. We were just planning to ride to the McDonalds' drive-thru a few miles away and then back again.

When we were on the bike, Edward started riding faster. The road was empty and we were both getting off on the speed. All of a sudden the heavens opened and the visibility on the road went to practically zero. Edward turned a corner too fast and skidded on a patch of surface water. We came off the road and ended up tumbling into a tree. I don't really remember what happened between then and waking up in the hospital three days later, flanked on one side by my parents and on the other by a stricken Edward, himself banged up with his arm in a sling.

Edward's never forgiven himself for the accident. He thinks he nearly killed me.

However, I forgave him instantly. It wasn't the most sensible idea for us to go riding in the rain and although the idea had been his, I didn't offer any dissent. I had been all for it. I spent a week in the hospital, and another week at home before I could go back to school. I made a full recovery and it even helped me decide that I wanted to become a surgeon because I was fascinated with the way Edward's arm had been put back together. He was in surgery for six hours. Six hours of surgeons manipulating his broken bones and fixing them together with pins and metal plates. Now, despite that terrible injury, Edward has full function in his arm. That's amazing, right? Well, I think so.

Chelsea didn't visit him once when he was in the hospital or recovering at home. When he went back to school, she spent ages moaning about the fact that he couldn't ride anymore. Nevertheless their relationship limped on until Edward was in university in Leeds. She had cheated on him for months and he found out a month or two into his first term. He replaced her with Victoria, or Bitch-toria as I called her.

It wasn't until Edward had graduated from law school and had been working a while that I suspected he might have feelings for Bella. He'd only ever talked about her in passing, and I never met her while they were at law school. But after he was dumped by Jessica, who was sweet but just wrong for Edward, he started talking about Bella more and more. He had a serious case of mention-itis.

When I met Bella the first time, at a New Years' Eve party, it was clear that she adored him. She was always looking for him out of the corner of her eye. When they chatted she did girly-flirty things like twirling her hair and batting her eyelashes, but she never out-and-out made it obvious that she was into him, and with Edward, girls have to ditch the subtlety. He never approaches a girl unless he's sure she'll reciprocate because he's so scared of rejection.

As I got to know her, especially after Rosie and I got together, I realised that underneath that meek exterior, Bella was quite the little tigress. She ferociously backed up her opinions, she defended what she thought was right and she would do anything for her loved ones, most of all Edward. She wasn't just taken with his handsome looks and charm. She saw past his insecurities through to his inner goodness. Her love for him was pure, but Edward didn't seem to realise.

It wasn't until he'd been with Heidi for a year that he finally told me that he cared deeply for Bella. I was sure she loved him but didn't know for sure so suggested he test the water by telling her that he was intending to propose to Heidi. But I hadn't known about Bella's sense of self-preservation. She didn't let on but she had pulled out what she calls her 'lawyer poker-face'; apparently she was actually heartbroken. I only found that out when Edward called me from Hong Kong. He told me about what happened in Paris, that he had gone out to HK to win her heart and that he had succeeded. When Rosie found out my advice to Edward she clapped me on the head and told me that my suggestion had been the stupidest idea ever.

So now we're in Rome. Edward got offered a great job here and Bella came with him, accepting a temporary post to be with him. They're living together and he sounds happier than I've ever heard him.

Rosalie and I get to the centre of Rome for 6pm. We had been hoping to get here for lunchtime along with Alice and Jasper but I was on a night shift until 10am and Rosie had a few things to do at work in the morning so we took an afternoon flight. We check into the hotel near where Edward and Bella live and take a stroll around the market and the old buildings before making our way to the restaurant.

It's a warm night so Rosie and I take our glasses of wine out onto the terrace. We spot Edward and Bella walking across the square towards the restaurant and before we go to greet them, take a minute to observe them together.

"God, don't they look blissful?" My beautiful girlfriend says. "And so chic! Like something out of a Fellini film." I don't have a clue who Fellini is but they do look very content, and very much like they are locals (well I guess they are really). Edward has one arm around her shoulders and Bella has linked her fingers through his hand; her other arm is around his waist. In his spare hand, Edward is holding two jackets- his and hers. They aren't really watching where they are going because they are gazing at each other, starry-eyed.

"They do. As happy as you and me Babe." She grins and lays a smacker of a kiss on my lips.

"Let's go surprise them, then." She takes my hand and we walk back inside.

-cc-

**AN: So...love it? Hate it?**

**Thanks for reading everyone! I really appreciate it. **


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: Hello! **

**Thank you for stopping by! I hope you like this instalment of the inner workings of Edward's mind!**

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**-cc-**

**Nineteen**

**Part 1**

I want to marry Bella.

I have to marry Bella.

I need to marry Bella.

She is my air, my water, my earth and my fire.

After her birthday weekend, I tell her about my law school idea. Bella squeals and jumps up and down before hugging and kissing me ecstatically. She tells me that her boyfriend is a genius and that she doesn't have words to explain how much she loves me. In that moment all I can think is that I wished she'd said 'husband' not 'boyfriend'.

In the three days that follow, I work my ass off trying to collect all my ideas into a proposal report to take to Aro. However I drag myself away from my project long enough to call my mother, one evening when Bella is out with Charlotte. We make small talk for a little while. I tell her about Bella's birthday weekend and she tells me about the latest big event her company organised- a large open-air classical music festival. When there is a lull, I casually drop into the conversation that I am intending to ask my Bella to marry me in the not-too-distant future.

There is silence followed by an almighty squeal. I think Esme Cullen may have just burst her son's eardrum.

"_Yay! YAY! Wooo...!"_

"Mum!"

"_Sorry! Sorry! I just wasn't expecting it so soon! Oh, Edward! Oh Sweetie! My son's getting married!"_

"Whoa, Mum! I haven't proposed yet! And I can't propose without a ring!"

"_You're right! Did you want some help with getting one?"_

"Yeah. I remembered that you said you and Dad got your rings designed by a jeweller and thought about that for us."

My parents had beautiful rings. Esme's engagement ring had two round diamonds sat side by side within an infinity shape, in a yellow gold band. Smaller diamonds were set around the infinity symbol. She had a matching simple gold wedding band studded with diamonds. Carlisle's wedding ring was a wide band of yellow gold, also set with small square diamonds. They were very unusual and I would love Bella and me to have something similar, but at the same time, unique to us.

"_That's right. Your father was doing a special medical school placement in Birmingham, at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital. When his boss found out he was intending to propose, he recommended a tiny shop in the Jewellery Quarter called Meyer Brothers and they designed the set of rings for us."_

"Are they still around? Would they be able to design a set for Bella and me?"

"_Yes, they're still around. In fact, they're now an exclusive jewellery design company- world famous."_

"Does that mean I'm not going to be able to afford them?" My heart sank.

"_Not necessarily. Your father operated on Wilson Meyer, the oldest of the brothers, last year. Apparently he was very sick, although I don't know the details. He was thrilled that Carlisle wore a ring designed by his company and in gratitude for saving his life, he said that if ever we wanted any pieces designed he'd give us a 50% discount."_

"That's great! Not that Mr Meyer was ill but that Dad saved him and that I may be able to afford bespoke rings."

"Yes, although _I get the feeling that Bella wouldn't care if the ring was made of a paper-clip."_

"I know. I just want her to have the best ring I can afford and one that she would love to wear."

"_You know her better than me Sweetie, so what were you thinking in terms of design?"_

I think about it for a moment. I do love the infinity shape of my mother's engagement ring, but I'm not sure whether Bella would like two such large diamonds on her finger. She's modest, and doesn't like to dress too ostentatiously. I imagine my mother's ring on her finger and immediately imagine Bella being uncomfortable with it.

"I'm not sure. How did you come up with the design of yours?"

"_The infinity shape studded with diamonds is the Meyer Brothers' signature feature. We chose that and then they suggested lots of combinations of stones before coming up with the idea of us having our birthstones. And since both your father and I were born in April, we got two diamonds."_

"Birthstones? That could work. Bella's birthstone is sapphire for September, but what's the June birthstone?"

"_Pearl."_

I imagine a pearl and a sapphire sat next to each other within the infinity shape, sat on Bella's delicate finger. A thrill goes through me.

"I really like that idea!" My mind starts whirring. "Do you think that they could embed little pearls and sapphires into wedding bands for us?"

"_They could, but to be honest, I don't think they'd look good on you. Pearls are for girls, Sweetie!"_

I imagine pearls on my finger. My mother is right.

"What about pearls for Bella and small sapphires in a band for me? And they could be platinum rather than gold, to match the bangle I got Bella for her birthday."

"_That's perfect Edward! You'd be wearing her birthstone and she'd be wearing yours! An exchange of your love!" My mother exclaimed. "I'm driving into Birmingham tomorrow for a meeting. I'll pop into the shop and talk to a designer and then send you the sketches by email."_

"Brilliant! Thanks Mum!"

"_Thank you Edward! You're giving me a daughter! I'm so happy!"_

-cc-

Aro loves my proposal for a law school at VDI. He does, however put his name down as the official project lead, but draws up a contract to state that I will get full credit if the project is a success. He also gives me a promotion to executive and agrees to me setting the school in Leeds. Bella is there for the meeting and suggests Siobhan as my local mentor, as well as painstakingly checking the contract with me to ensure there are no loopholes that will come bite me in the ass later on down the line. She also sends the contract to Siobhan for her to look over it as well. When we are all happy, I sign, committing myself to the project, to VDI as the first Academic Law Division Executive ever, and to Leeds, for at least three years.

I have the job of my dreams and I don't have to be parted from the love of my life. The only thing that can make my life complete now is Bella to be my wife and for us to have gorgeous babies together.

My mother sends me updates on the progress of the rings which won't be ready until the end of November. Bella's parents are coming to Rome for Christmas and she, Peter and Charlotte insist on inviting my parents over too. Carlisle and Esme fall over themselves to accept and my mother agrees to bring the rings over. I am determined not to plan my proposal of marriage because I don't want it to be contrived. I just want to ask her one day when a special moment comes upon us, when we are alone. Bella would hate a big, planned, fancy proposal with lots of people watching.

There is just one thing I need to do before I propose to Bella, and I need to do it before Christmas. I need to talk to Charlie Swan.

I spend a week picking up the phone and hanging up before dialling. I won't lie. Bella's father scares the shit out of me. In the end I decide to write him a letter. I'm a fan of putting pen to paper. Email's great for convenience but there's nothing like receiving a hand-written letter in the post.

It takes several drafts but eventually I send him this:

_Dear Mr Swan, _

_How are you and Renee? As you probably have heard from Bella, we are both doing very well here in Rome. I have been lucky enough to get a promotion to executive level in Leeds, and we are moving there together in the New Year. _

_Bella was my inspiration and I wouldn't have got my promotion without her. In fact, I wouldn't have much of anything at all without her. I appreciate that you are wary of me and more than a little sceptical, given my previous disastrous relationship history, but I want to assure you that if I had thought Bella loved me then I would never have gotten involved with any other girls. _

_Sir, I love your daughter more than life itself. I am amazed by her every moment of every day. You don't need me to tell you that she is brilliant. The sharpest, the shiniest, the brightest. By some miracle, she loves me too. She tells me that I make her feel like the most beautiful girl in the world (which she is, of course) and she makes me the best man I could ever hope to be._

_Since our conversation at Bella's birthday party a few weeks ago, I have been thinking about marrying her more and more. I'm still not sure when I will propose, but it will be soon. I'm having rings designed for us and I'm hopeful that when we move to Leeds, sooner rather than later we will be able to start looking for a bigger house, to one day fill with children. _

_I asked for your approval in September, Mr Swan, and you asked me to ask you again when I intended to propose. This is me asking again. I don't need it, and as you pointed out, Bella won't either, if she wants to marry me. But I should like to have it all the same. I would love to be able to be as much a part of your family, one day, as Charlotte is now. _

_Please let me know your thoughts._

_Yours sincerely_

_Edward Cullen (hopefully soon to be your future son-in-law)_

Charlie writes back in a week. He keeps it simple.

_Dear Edward_

_Bella tells me you're intense. She's not wrong. _

_You're in love with my daughter? Well, she says she is in love with you too._

_You make her happy. If she's happy, I'm happy, so go for it, Kid. _

_That's as much approval as I will give. The rest is up to Bella. _

_Charlie Swan (your future father-in-law, maybe)_

_PS: I meant it when I said that I would hurt you if you hurt her though. Seriously, I will kick your ass until it's in your mouth and then kick it back out again._

-cc-

**Part 2**

The rings are exquisite. When I see them for the first time I almost cry. It is Christmas Eve and I have just collected my parents at the airport and brought them back to Campo de'Fiori, to the apartment Bella owns, but which she insists is ours. Carlisle and Esme are staying in the spare room, which we have renovated together, adding an en-suite wet room.

"Edward?" Both my parents are looking at me with concern. "Are they OK?" My mother asks nervously. "We can return them if you're not..."

"Mum, they're perfect." I say, my throat thick with emotion. I glance at my father. He is beaming, with pride, I think.

"We think so too!" Carlisle puts his arm around my shoulders. "Edward, we're very proud of you, son. I don't think you could have found a better girl to make our new daughter."

"She might refuse me." I worry.

"Son, that girl loves you. It's written all over her face, it's in the way she moves, it's in the way she talks to you and about you." My father says.

"Sweetie, you deserve her love." Esme adds, addressing my underlying fears. "Speaking of Bella, where is she?"

"She's just round at her brother's house. Charlotte, Bella's sister-in-law, isn't feeling well at the moment, and Bella's helping out with a few errands at the moment, but she should be back any..."

The front door of our apartment slams. I quickly grab the ring box and shove it in my mother's handbag. I'll retrieve it later and hide it somewhere. We all smile at each other briefly before Bella appears.

We go out for dinner with the Swans and it is an unmitigated success. Charlie and Carlisle, despite their different backgrounds, get on like they've known each other since childhood. Esme and Renee also seem to bond well. Gianna, Bella's delightful little niece, absolutely adores my parents. She immediately identifies them with Mufasa and Sarabi from The Lion King (her favourite Disney movie) and after a little while, climbs into Carlisle's lap and refuses to leave.

After the meal, my parents wish to go to midnight mass, keen to experience a large Catholic service in Rome. Renee and I decide to go too. I'm not a particularly religious person but if God exists, then I want to beg him to grant me Bella's love forever. I have hidden the ring at the back of one of the drawers in our bedroom for now. I'm going to move it somewhere better when I can.

The service is beautiful and I leave feeling moved and hopeful for my future with Bella. We walk Renee back to Peter and Charlotte's apartment before returning to Bella. The apartment is dark when we enter, suggesting that Bella has gone to bed. I'm not surprised. It's nearly 2am. After wishing my parents a good night I head into the bedroom and try to be stealthily quiet when I enter.

"It's OK, Baby, I'm up." Bella says, and the light comes on. She is sat up in bed, wide awake, wearing my ancient but much loved Pac-Man t-shirt.

"Sorry, Gorgeous, did we wake you?" I ask as I undress to my boxers and slide into bed next to her.

"No I couldn't sleep." She replies. I glance over her. She clearly has been tossing and turning because her long chestnut-coloured locks are in disarray.

"No?" I kiss her gently."Everything OK?"

She doesn't say anything. I sit back up. She has an odd, confused look on her face. _What's the matter? _

"Bella. Bella love, what's wrong?" I ask urgently, suddenly very worried. She still doesn't say anything and I can feel panic start to build within me. She sighs softly before clambering over me and going to the chest of drawers next to the bed. The chest of drawers where I hid the rings. _Shit. Big stinking shit. _

"I found it when I borrowed this." She says, pulling the little velvet box out of its hiding place and pulling at the hem of the t-shirt.

"Oh." I reply pathetically, big dork that I am. She comes back to bed but this time climbs into my lap. I raise my knees up and she leans against them.

"They are beautiful, Baby." She almost-whispers, smiling slightly. I find myself starting to smile back in hope.

"Yeah? You like them?" She nods and holds my hand, linking and unlinking our fingers. "But something's not sitting right with you. I can tell." I add, unable to fully read the expression on her face.

"Edward, I know we've talked about our future together, about getting married and buying houses and having kids, but I guess I thought that it was a little way off. Seeing the rings just brought it out of the future and into the here and now." She tells me "I mean, these are bespoke rings aren't they? Made for us? This tells me that marriage has been on your mind for a while." Nothing gets by Bella. She knows my thought processes implicitly.

"It has." I admit. "I commissioned them just after your birthday, from the jeweller who made my parents' rings. Mum and Dad collected them for me."

"When were you planning to...um...ask?" She asks tentatively. I can tell she is worried about how I intend to ask for her hand.

"I didn't have an exact plan really. I was just going to go on instinct, you know? I didn't want to plan it too much because I figured you would hate a big, fancy, staged proposal. But I wanted to have the ring there ready for when it felt right to ask."

Relief washes through her.

"So you weren't proposing tomorrow at Christmas dinner?" _What? No way!_

"God no! Bella, my darling, gorgeous love, when I propose, I want it to be just us, wherever and whenever that may be." I lean forward and cup her face. "Just you and I, my love. You and I." I try to reassure her.

"Perfect." She whispers and she looks so unbelievably gorgeous that I just have to kiss her and kiss her properly, so that she and I are both left breathless.

"Bella, I have been happier in the past eight months than I have ever been in my whole life." I tell her, overwhelmed by love and warmth. "I want forever and more with you. I know time-wise we've not been together that long, but we're so right together and we've loved each other for so many years..."

"I agree, Baby. I totally agree." She interrupts, but it's more than welcome. "I love you so much and the best part is, I_ feel_ how much you love me. And when you feel the time is right, when it's just us, I promise I _will_ say yes."

"You will?" I can't wipe the grin off my face but still need to check.

"I will." She repeats, leaving me ecstatic with happiness. One day, Bella Swan will be my wife. I cannot wait.

Actually, I really don't think I can wait. If she will say yes whenever I ask...?

"What if I asked now?"

She bites her lip, and arousal as well as love floods me. _My future wife is the sexiest woman alive! My future wife. Wow._

"Are you actually asking now?" I can't say anything because I'm so overcome. _I'm proposing to Bella. Right now._ I just look into her eyes and wait until I can find my voice again. "Edward?"

I pull the engagement ring out of the box and put it on my little finger, ready to slide onto her finger if she really meant what she said about promising to say yes. I pick up her left hand and suddenly my words find me again.

"Isabella Marie Swan, my beautiful, gorgeous, darling Bella. There are no words to describe how much I am in love with you. You _are_ my heart, you _are _my soul and you _are_ my reason for living. Your presence makes me soar, makes me the best man I can be. If you'll let me, I promise I will spend the rest of my days trying to make you happy. Please will you do me the most extraordinary honour of agreeing to be my wife?" _I am going to cry. And I actually don't care._

Neither does Bella apparently. Her face is wet from her tears.

"Yes. One hundred million percent yes!"

She said yes.

Bella is going to be my wife.

I have everything in life now that I have her.

I pull her against me and kiss and kiss and kiss her. We laugh and we cry together as we break apart. I look down at the ring I am about to give to her in promise of marriage and caress it with my lips before transferring it to her left ring finger.

"Perfect fit!" I exclaim as it nestles at the base of her digit. She looks at it and smiles her most enchanting smile before enveloping me in the chocolate pools that are her eyes.

"Yes, Edward. You are." My fiancée whispers. _Right back at you, Gorgeous._

_-cc-_

**AN: If you like it please let me know. **


	20. Chapter 20

**AN: Hi all! Welcome back! Thank you for stopping by! Hope you're well! I'm actually having a crap week, but fan fiction and wine make it better. **

**This is the first of two chapters today. I'm not going to be able to post next week, but hopefully I'll be good for the week after. **

**I don't own Twilight! I wish I did! **

**-cc-**

**Twenty**

"OH MY GOD!" I hear Kate exclaim from across the room. We are at Rosalie and Emmett's engagement party at the very swanky St Pancras Renaissance Hotel in London. Tonight is the first night Bella and I are quietly showing that we are together and engaged.

With barely an 'excuse me' to Emmett's father Chris, I dash across to the bar where Bella is standing opposite Kate and Garrett. Kate is staring at Bella's hand and looking shocked. This is exactly the kind of attention Bella hates, and the reason why we didn't make a big announcement.

"Congratulations, Bella. Who's the lucky chap? Is he here?" Garrett asks her as I make it to her side.

"Hey guys!" I give my former flatmate a big hug. I've not seen him in eighteen months. I also kiss Kate on the cheek in greeting, hoping to distract her from the interrogation she's about to put onto Bella. "It's been ages! How are..." It doesn't work.

"Edward, did you know Bella's engaged? Wow! I mean, where did you even meet him? 'Cause weren't you single when you left for Hong Kong? Is that where you met him, or was it Rome? Bit of a whirlwind romance, eh?" I swear Kate's eyes are about to pop out of her head. I can feel the unease emanating from my Bella and stand so close to her that our hips are touching before running my hand up and down her back.

"Kate, if you let her actually speak, I'm sure Bella will tell you." Garrett says, clearly annoyed by his wife's relentless questioning. Garrett glances over me and sees where my hand is and then makes eye-contact with me. He's figured it out but Kate's clearly oblivious. She's completely missed my obvious body language towards Bella. Bella's still uncomfortable so I decide I'm just going to tell her.

"Well, Kate I did know Bella was engaged, as it happens..." I lean across Bella and pick up her left hand with my right, "...seeing as it was me who asked if she would be my wife."

Kate's mouth falls open in surprise.

"You proposed to Bella?" I nod. "When?"

"Christmas."

"How long have you even been together?" There is a sneering, incredulous tone in her voice, one that I do not care for at all. _She's supposed to be a friend. _

"We had our one-year anniversary a couple of weeks ago."

"Have you set a date?"

"Not yet. We're going to buy a house and get a bit settled in before we make wedding plans." Bella tells her.

"Well, you certainly kept that quiet! I mean, I knew you were both in Rome at the same time and that you had both moved to Leeds but I didn't realise you were _together_."

"We didn't feel the need for a big announcement." I reply, kissing Bella's smooth cheek. I can tell that Bella's getting angry, and her inner tigress is bubbling up to the surface.

"What about Jessica?" Kate asks.

"What about her?" Bella replies, her annoyance starting to colour her usually-soft voice.

"Don't you think she's going to be pissed when she finds out that her supposedly-good friend is marrying her ex?" _What?_

"Kate!" Garrett exclaims. The tips of his ears are pink. They only do that when he's angry.

"I don't know. I'll find out tomorrow. We're having coffee and I was planning to tell her then." Bella says, stiffening slightly. She's already worried about telling Jessica. This won't help.

"Kate, Jess and I broke up years ago. She's married and has a kid with another guy. Bella and I are in love and very happy. I would hope that Jess would be pleased for us, but if she's not, we'll deal with it." I reply.

"You should have told her! You should have checked that Jess was OK with you dating her ex!" _Seriously? What is Kate's problem?_

"Why?" Bella's inner tigress has emerged. _God she's sexy when she's mad._ "It's none of her business! She dumped Edward over four years ago! Tomorrow will be the first time I've even seen her since her wedding eighteen months ago, and it's not like she, or you for that matter, made a huge effort to keep in touch whilst we were out of the country! Perhaps if you'd bothered to send a text or email or Facebook message, or reply to one of mine, it might not have been such a surprise!"

Bella is absolutely fuming. When she gets this mad she cries and if that happens, she'll be upset with herself and embarrassed. I have to try to calm her down a bit.

"It's OK, Gorgeous. You don't have to explain anything. We haven't done anything wrong." I wrap my arms around her and kiss the side of her forehead. I feel her relax a little and some of her composure returns. We face Kate and Garrett. Kate looks a little sheepish. Bella has chastised her well.

"Look Edward, Bella, I'm really happy for you both. You look so content. I'm glad you found one another." Garrett says sincerely before grabbing Kate's hand. "I spot Tyler and Lauren over there. Come on Kate."

When they are out of our sight I take her back into my arms to help her calm down some more. She is trembling slightly.

"Bella, my love, it's OK." I murmur. "I know you were dreading that very thing happening."

"I was but I am sorry. I shouldn't have lost my temper like that." Bella is an ordered, controlled person. She hates too much attention and she hates losing face in public. But Kate was out of line. I was fuming myself.

"Well if you hadn't, I probably would have done. I heard her exclaim 'Oh My God' from across the room and thought you might need the support."

"I really did! Thank you Baby." She raises herself as high as she can on her tiptoes and kisses me, sneaking the tip of her tongue into my mouth. In the background I can hear Emmett and Rosalie catcalling but if Bella doesn't care then neither do I.

The next morning, Bella and I have breakfast with my parents. Bella and I are sat next to each other, holding hands under the table, not really paying attention to my father's excited chatter about our planned visit to The Wellcome Library, which has a museum dedicated to the history of medicine. We are too distracted by each other, remembering how we sealed our intense, passionate connection the previous night.

Yesterday, after our little confrontation with Kate, we stayed together. Bella's anxieties about revealing our engagement were still riding quite high and she needed me. She's always so fiercely independent that it's nice to feel like I'm there for her sometimes instead of the other way round. When we returned to our room after the party, I could tell that Bella was still upset by Kate's reaction, even though Kate did later come back to apologise. She needed to feel my love for her, its strength, its depth. So I undressed her slowly, gave her a massage and worshipped her with kisses before making love to her as gently as I could manage. It definitely worked. She is glowing this morning, and I can tell that she is ready for whatever may come of her meeting with Jessica.

It is almost painful to let go of her when the time comes for me to go off with my parents and for her to meet Jessica. The Wellcome Library is interesting, but I am only half paying attention. I have one hand on my phone at all times because I'm waiting to hear from Bella.

"Edward? Are you all right son?" My father asks suddenly.

"What? Yeah. Why?" I ask, pulling myself out of my internal musings.

"You've been staring at that skull for the past five minutes. It's not _that_ interesting!"

"Oh! Sorry Dad. I was just thinking about...um...things..."

"Bella?" I nod. "I was like that when your mother and I got engaged. I got no work done, I daydreamed in classes. I dropped a scalpel into the abdomen of a cadaver in my anatomy dissection class. I told my microbiology lecturer that I was looking at a worm under the microscope when it was an eyelash."

"Wow. Lucky it happened when you were in medical school and not actually operating!" I joked back. Carlisle laughed. My mother heard him and came over from the other side of the room.

"How are my boys doing?" She asks. Carlisle puts his arm around her shoulders.

"Good, my darling. Your son, it seems, is also the owner of a Cullen Moony Face." Esme laughs out loud.

"Cullen Moony Face?" I ask.

"When your father was caught daydreaming in his anatomy class when we first got engaged, his friend John yelled really loudly across the dissection lab 'Hey Cullen! Quit your Moony Face!' The name stuck for ages!"

"Wow. Are you still talking to him, your friend John?"

"Yes although sadly we're not so close. We still see each other at alumni events and surgical conferences but that's about it. He's a neurosurgeon now, in Leeds as it happens. And he became a professor last year. Professor John Gerandy. It's strange. I remember him as the guy who learnt his anatomy by singing the names of structures in funny voices!"

We all laugh and then continue our tour of the Wellcome Library. I text Bella when we're done and she texts back immediately.

"_Hey, Baby. Nearly done. Jess great about us & wants to say hi to you. Can you come over for 5 mins? We're at Carluccios. Love you xxx"_

I walk into the concourse of St Pancras a few minutes later. Jess spots me and waves enthusiastically. She looks relaxed and glowing. She's a little heavier and there are faint dark circles under her eyes but she has never looked better. She glances down at the baby in her arms and the love radiates from her.

Jess and I haven't been in contact much since we broke up but when we have seen each other, we've been friendly. She's happy with that Mike guy and I'm happy for her. It doesn't surprise me that she's taken the news of our engagement well. All our friends and family have been thrilled for us, in fact, except Kate. I don't know what her problem is, and actually I don't care. Bella and I are perfect together. Kate can go to Hell.

-cc-


	21. Chapter 21

**AN: Hi everyone! As promised, here's the second of two chapters today. Thanks for reading!**

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**-cc- **

**Twenty-One**

I'm in the middle of writing up my weekly progress report for Aro when my mobile rings. It's Emmett. He asks about coming up to Leeds with Rosalie in a couple of weeks but Bella and I are moving house that weekend and we'd be crappy hosts. Sadly he's working the weekend after that so we don't set a date for their long overdue trip up north. Em also asks me whether and I have set a date; we haven't but I plan on asking her to set one tomorrow night at dinner. We have reservations at a hot new restaurant in Leeds that Bella's been desperate to try since she heard about it a couple of months ago.

After I put the phone down I finish the report, email it to Aro and copy in Siobhan. The law school has been progressing remarkably well. We have sorted out our faculty, our curriculum and the empty offices downstairs are being refitted to serve as the school's premises. I am currently recruiting IT and admin staff, and putting together our final plans for recruiting students. There is still a lot to do and I have to present the project to all the partners at the AGM in a couple of weeks, which is really starting to stress me out.

After I finish the report I head to Bella's office. She is just putting down the phone as I walk in. She does not look happy.

"Everything OK Gorgeous?" She shakes her head and walks from her desk and places herself into my arms. "What's up?"

"My big-bucks packaging companies merger is possibly under threat thanks to some dodgy bookkeeping." She sighs. "Jared's found some discrepancies."

"Shit. How bad could it be?"

"Worst-case scenario, the whole merger could be subject to a government review and when they get involved, more often than not the whole thing goes down the toilet." I kiss her temple to comfort her. "I'm hoping it won't come to that. My immediate problem is that I'm going to have to go to Bristol first thing tomorrow on the first train out. 6-bloody-am."

"Oh Bella love. How annoying." She nods in agreement.

"I'm sorry Handsome. I'm not going to get home until really late tomorrow so I'll miss our night out."

"No problem my love. The restaurant's not going anywhere. We can go another time." I reply but inside I'm disappointed. We won't be having the conversation about setting a wedding date tomorrow and I'd been building myself up for it in my mind for days.

"Have I told you how much I love you today, Edward Anthony Cullen?" She says.

"Yes but when we get home, you could show me..." I kiss her and feel her relax into my embrace.

Bella does show me. The moment we get home, she shuts the front door behind us and pushes me against it. Within seconds her lips are at my neck and her hands are at my belt, and before I know it she has my trousers around my ankles and is giving me the best hand-job I've ever had. She uses two hands- one to jerk me off and the other to play with my balls. Wow.

At around 10pm whilst we are cuddling on the sofa, Bella all of a sudden reaches for the remote control, turns off the TV and stands up. Without saying anything she holds out her hand for me and when I take it, she leads me upstairs. She has me sit on the bed whilst she tantalisingly strips for me, revealing her creamy white skin, her luscious breasts, her inviting pussy.

Once naked, Bella strides over to me, straddles my lap and runs her hands into my hair. She grins, bounces up and down on top of my hard dick and attacks my mouth with hers. I can't see, hear, smell, taste or feel anything but my future wife. Her hands leave my hair and move to the hem of my t-shirt and soon it is lost. I love her on top of me like this.

"Mmm...Edward..." she moans.

"You're so sexy, my love. I can't wait for you to be my wife." I whisper.

I sneak my hands down her back and grip her beautiful, soft ass. Bella throws her head back in pleasure and my lust for her grows. I can feel her heat against my aching cock and wonder if she is ready for me to enter her tight, hot, wondrous pussy.

As if she knows my thoughts, she takes one hand off my chest and brings it to her core. She strokes two fingers along her slit and dips inside; I can hear the squelch of wetness and even more blood rushes to my groin in anticipation. She leans forward and brings those fingers to my lips. I lick them enthusiastically and then suck them into my mouth. She tastes divine.

"Bella Cullen. _Your _Bella Cullen." She murmurs into my ear and before I can beg her to take me inside her, she's sitting up again, her fingers still in my mouth and raises herself up slightly.

I don't hesitate to release her ass and pull down my boxers. She sinks down on me and we both moan at the sensation. I thrust up and she bounces herself up and we move together in a now-familiar and well-practised harmony. It still surprises me every time we have sex, that I want her even more. She's like my own personal brand of heroin. The more I have, the more I want.

Bella leans forward and brings her arms to either side of my head, and then rubs her nose against mine before licking her tongue against my lips. I hold her by the waist and flip her over so that I can be on top. She giggles as I suck her earlobe and runs her hands up and down my back, digging her nails into my shoulders when I thrust particularly hard. I build up a good rhythm and quickly approach my climax; delicious heat and tension build low in my groin. I'm aware that she hasn't come yet so press a finger to her clit.

"Oh fuck!" She cries. I repeat my action, tapping and rubbing against her sensitive nub, knowing that it's the key to getting her off quickly. "Don't stop, Baby!"

"Don't plan to, my love." I reply.

"Unngghh...mmm...aah..." she mumbles as I speed up the movements of my fingers on my darling girl's clit. I can feel her clenching around me. She's really close.

"Let go Gorgeous."

She does as I've asked and I follow her to nirvana as with one last thrust, I come hard inside her. Fucking hell, it's so good I see spots and stars in front of my eyes.

"That was amazing!" Bella pants before raining kisses over my face. I snuggle my face down against her soft breasts and murmur my assent.

"Hell yes."

"Mmm..." Bella reaches behind her and turns off the lights, and we both drift off into a relaxed slumber.

-cc-

I wake up cold to the alarm clock. It flashes '7am' at me. Bella is nowhere to be seen.

"Bella, love?" I call, before realising that she's long gone. She would have left the flat at 5.30 to catch the 6am train to Bristol. I huff to myself. I hate waking up without her.

The rest of the day doesn't get much better. Aro emails me a whole list of questions following my progress report and I have to spend ages answering them. I dictate some urgent letters and take them to the admin staff to be typed, only to find that all but one of them are on a training day and the one left behind is the one that stares at me like I'm food and types at a snail's pace. At lunchtime I walk to Bella's office and it's only when I'm at her assistant's desk that I remember that she's not there. I end up eating lunch alone in my office. I feel unsettled and restless all day.

By 4.30pm, I'm in a foul mood. I've only had one text from Bella all day, telling me that her client's accounts are a disaster and her deal is on the rocks. I text her back straight away but she doesn't reply; I can tell from the tone of her text that she is feeling stressed.

I decide to head home early. I am in desperate need of a drink. The moment I get home I pour myself a good-sized Scotch. The alcohol burns my throat as it goes down, accompanied by a honey, malty aftertaste. I feel better instantly.

At around 5.45, I get a text from Bella saying that she's coming home tonight but that she'll take a taxi as she's not sure what time she'll get here. I feel even better but I won't fully relax until she's back. I'm kind of lost without her. I'm also still kind of upset that our night out is on hold. The more I think about it, the more I want her as my wife and the sooner the better. We need to have a conversation about it but it won't be tonight. She'll be tired and I don't want to pressure her.

I have another couple of drinks, pick at some snacks and watch some TV whilst waiting for my beautiful girl to return home to me. Finally, at 10.45pm, I hear her key in the door and rush out to meet her. Bella looks tired, but before I can get a good look at her, she yanks me into her arms by the collar of my polo shirt and kisses me with all her might.

"Oof, Bella love, what was that for?" I say, when she finally lets me go.

"I missed you. This day has been way too long and way way too eventful." She replies, looking like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders.

"What happened?"

"Can I tell you after I've freshened up?" She says. She must have had a really shitty day.

"OK love. I've put a bottle of wine in the fridge, all ready for you." I tell her.

"Thank you Baby." I am rewarded by another kiss.

Bella follows me to the kitchen briefly whilst checking her email on her phone and I pour her a glass of wine and start making us toasted cheese sandwiches. She won't want anything more complicated than that. She has a couple of sips of wine before kissing me once more and heading upstairs to change. I finish my glass of wine and pour myself another before assembling the cheese sandwiches ready to go into the sandwich toaster. I am about to slot them in when the sound of a message delivery echoes through the kitchen. Unthinkingly I press the Home button on Bella's iPhone which has lit up with a Facebook message.

When I see the name attached to the message my blood goes cold.

_Jacob Black_

_It was great to see you again today. I was..._

My heart stutters. Bella saw Jacob today? WHAT THE FUCK?

I can feel anger and confusion bubble up from deep inside me and burn through my veins. Why is Bella seeing her ex? Jacob got to spend time with her today and I didn't? _So fucking wrong. _

Jacob was a fucking idiot to have let her go. He can't have her back now. _She's mine! My future wife. MINE!_

Why didn't she tell me? Did she not want me to know? Is she thinking of leaving me?

A tiny corner of my brain is desperately trying to rein in my rage and hurt, trying to rationalise, trying desperately to reason that there's probably a sensible explanation and that Bella's probably going to tell me about it when she comes back, but the anger is winning.

I can feel myself trembling; all my muscles are tense. The anger is definitely winning.

I hear Bella coming down the stairs and the tension builds even further. I am shaking trying to hold onto my emotions. Doubts flood my mind. _Has Bella come to her senses? Is she going to leave me for Jacob?_

"Edward, what's wrong?" Bella walks in and runs right to me, concern all over her face. _Is your concern genuine? Do you really love me? Want me?_

"Care to tell me," I begin, as controlled as I can manage, "why Jacob Black is sending you messages on Facebook saying how great it was to see you again?"

Bella's face turns from one of concern to confusion, and her big eyes widen so much that they are almost like saucers. I see one prevailing emotion in them. Hurt.

My rage is still dominating me however, and I can't help but press her for information even though I know from the look on her face that there's a perfectly innocent and rational explanation. My mistake is confirmed as Bella-the-tigress takes over. _Shit. Big stinking shit. I've massively fucked up and Bella's about to blow her lid. Like she should. _

All I can do is pray that I haven't lost her forever.

_Damn, I need another drink._

-cc-

**Please consider leaving me a review. Thank you!**


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: Hi everyone and welcome back to 'High Stays the Tide.' Thank you so much for following and reviewing!**

**This chapter was originally going to be a Kate POV but then I went and published it in the main story as an outtake so I feature another guest POV, someone who has piqued the curiosity of a few of you. **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Twenty-Two**

**Tanya Denali**

Partners' meetings are a necessary evil. We don't get together very often because we are so spread out over the world, and there's only so much you can do over a conference call. This year, my office is hosting the Annual General Meeting because the International Law Association conference is being held here in London.

Today Aro is being a complete pain in the ass because he's so excited about his law school project taking off. The project he started with Edward Cullen, my former protégé, who Aro lured away from my office.

I'm still pissed about that.

I had tipped Edward to be my right-hand man ever since the day he started at VDI. He possessed an analytical mind, a passion for the law and was extremely hard working and diligent. However complicated the case, he would get it. On his first day I threw him, along with Isabella Swan, into the deep end with one of the biggest cases my department had ever handled. They did all the grunt work, made sensible suggestions when their input was required and their Italian language skills were invaluable.

It quickly became apparent that while Edward was fantastic with the theoretic aspects of law and great with the numbers, Bella was far more at home in the boardroom. She would charm and beguile clients. She was an achiever. She was young, naturally pretty, humble and endearing. In other words, she was _competition._

Edward is extremely attractive. Tall, broad-shouldered, lean, handsome and in possession of rippled, muscular arms. Sexy smile, sexy hair, sexy green eyes. I didn't care about the seventeen-year age difference. I wanted him. And I don't usually miss out on the things I want.

It was very clear that Edward and Bella had a connection. They weren't involved then but if they continued to spend so much time together, it would only be a matter of time. Some of the executives had labelled them the 'Dynamic Duo' and had suggested to me on a couple of occasions that we have them work on deals together in the future.

I couldn't have that. Clients had started to ask for Bella by name, and she was only a trainee! When my cousin Eleazar's wife Carmen, who runs our Corporate Litigation Division, was struggling with a sensitive case, I put Bella forward and turned it into a mini-promotion. Bella took it, and even negotiated terms to secure her future at VDI. Carmen and I couldn't help but be impressed with her quick mind. Even though I didn't want her to show me up in my department, I didn't want her to walk from VDI. If the Romanov Brothers, our biggest rivals, got wind of her, they'd go on a campaign to poach her.

Once she was safely in the Canary Wharf office and working her young and perky ass off for Carmen, I started to plan my move on Edward. I planned to promote him and then seduce him. Before I could even get started, though, he fucking took up with my PA, that airhead Heidi! I suppose he had to get some action from somewhere, and Heidi would certainly have given it up easily. Hell, she only had a job at VDI because her father, Corin Deveraux, is one of Aro's and Marcus's friends from boarding school. I had to be more careful. I couldn't just dive head first into a relationship with a junior colleague. I have a certain standing in the law world that I have to protect.

Edward started becoming restless. His work didn't suffer but he didn't look himself. Things between him and Heidi seemed strained. They became engaged, and then barely a month later, the engagement was off and Heidi had quit her job to become a model or some shit. Edward continued to look more and more wrecked. I thought it was because of the big deal we were working on but after the deal closed he had the mother of all anxiety attacks.

Desperate to keep him in my department and to resume my plan to seduce him, I got him to see the guidance counsellor. That was a mistake. She recommended a sabbatical. Edward went, and I never got him back. He went off to Africa to do some bleeding heart charity crap, and then ran away to Hong Kong, in order to win Bella's heart, as it turned out.

That was last year. Now he's the executive in Aro's Academic Law Division and is getting Aro's long-held dream of a VDI law school off the ground. He and Bella are engaged and I'm still alone, and pissed off. I can't actually believe that he wants to be working in boring Academic law, teaching instead of getting the thrill and the money of the big corporate deals. I think he's settled because of Bella. What is it about that girl?

Edward delivers an excellent presentation about the law school project, although I hate to admit it. He handles the questions well and Aro is bursting with pride. We have a short recess and a few of the other partners approach him to tell him 'well done.' Just as they are all leaving, I decide to put my two pence worth in.

"Miss Denali. How are you?" He enquires politely when I tap him on his shoulder.

"I'm fine thank you. Of course I'd be even better if you were working for me instead of Aro." I tell him.

"Your department made more profit than the rest of the UK departments put together last financial year. It seems like you're doing very well without me."

_Shit. How does he know that? That knowledge isn't going to help me win him back to my department or into my bed._

"Hmm. Are you really happy doing this law school stuff? Working your ass off in a job where you'll never earn more than basic salary? No bonuses, no travel? How are you not bored out of your skull?"

"We have a real chance to revolutionise the way law is taught. All our clients are up-to-date with modern ways of communication, modern management methods and emerging markets. But most law schools aren't. I didn't become a lawyer to make money, Miss Denali. I became a lawyer to make a difference, and I finally feel like I'm doing that. I'm passionate about this project."

_What complete bullshit. _

"I think that you're settling for this because it gives you a way to stay with Bella." I shoot back.

"You've got it wrong, Miss Denali. I was miserable in Finance. I was sleep-deprived and permanently stressed out. I didn't thrive on the adrenaline from a successful deal. Each one crippled me. I was talking seriously about quitting VDI altogether during my sabbatical but Bella was the one who made me hold off. Nevertheless, when Aro made me that job offer, I was on the point of sending you a resignation letter anyway. And I'm not sure if you know but Bella delayed taking up her promotion to executive to _stay with me _in Rome."

Then he does something I don't expect. He pierces his green eyes down at me and his nostrils flare. He means what he's saying and it's actually sexy as fuck.

"Err...sorry to interrupt, Miss Denali, but the partners are waiting for you in order to begin the next portion of the meeting."

"Well, good luck." I reply to Edward before leaving. I don't mean it, of course. I'm even more pissed than before.

Damn. It seems that I really have missed out there. He's happy up in the sticks with Bella. Aro loves him. Siobhan, Liam and Marcus are already talking about making Edward and Bella partners in the long-term.

I don't like it. I really don't like it. Not at all.

-cc-

**AN: This is the first of two chapters I'm posting tonight, so read on for the next, where we're back to EPOV! **


	23. Chapter 23

**AN: The second of two chapters I'm posting tonight and a return to EPOV! As ever, thanks for your support and let me know what you think! **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did!**

**-cc-**

**Twenty-Three**

Bella and I talked through my meeting with Heidi and she seems to understand. I don't tell her about putting my arm around Heidi. It didn't mean anything so it's inconsequential.

The next day we work from home so that we can continue unpacking, doing essential bits of home improvement like damp-proofing the basement, fixing lights in corridors and deep-cleaning. We plan to spend the rest of the week and the weekend doing bits and pieces, as well as receiving our new furniture on the Thursday, and going to a party at Alice and Jasper's house on Friday night, to welcome him back from Canada where he has spent the past month doing research for a series of articles for a well-known newspaper and travel magazine.

On Wednesday night however, I get a phone call from Alistair, the new manager I've hired, asking me to attend the interviews the next day for the VDI Law School's new administrative support team. He had been reviewing the job applications of the candidates we selected to interview and worries that he will struggle to decide who to hire on his own as they are all very similar in experience and skills. I explain the situation to Bella and she, as always, is so very understanding.

The interviews go well and we appoint half the team by the end of the day. I return home in the early evening to find a house full of furniture, still plastic-wrapped, but no Bella. After combing through the house to find her, I finally spot her in our huge garden, sitting in our gazebo, typing away furiously on her laptop, whilst talking into her mobile which she holds between her ear and tilted neck. She looks stressed, and I wonder if there has been yet another setback with the packaging companies' merger she has been working on for the past few weeks.

I pour Bella a glass of white wine and a Scotch for myself, and head out to her. She glances at me and smiles very briefly but is clearly distracted by her work.

"...No, Paul. That's entirely my point. We're switching our focus to the departments which, in the past three years, have performed the most poorly as they are the most likely to get cut if the merger goes ahead..." she sighs. "...Yes, that's right. Start with the last fiscal year and work backwards..."

She's going to be a while. I put the glass of wine in front of her but don't sit down.

"Bella?"

"Hang on a moment, Paul...sorry, Baby, it's just..."

"Doesn't matter, love. You take your time. When you come in I'll make some dinner and run you a bath, later, OK?"

"Thank you!" She purses her lips at me and I kiss her before leaving her to work. She is utterly focussed when her mind is on work so I don't mind that she's distracted right now. It's what makes her so good at what she does.

-cc-

The next morning I go back into the office to finish the interviews, and we are done by 2pm. I decide to head home to spend time with my Bella, who ended up working most of the evening yesterday. I walk to my car and am about to call her to see if she wants me to pick up a late lunch from the deli when my phone beeps with a text. It's not from a number I recognise.

The text contains a picture. I open it up and then almost drop my phone. It is a picture of me and Heidi, my arm around her.

'_You don't deserve Bella.' _The accompanying message.

My world shatters.

I don't know how I make it home but somehow I do. By the time I stumble through the door I am shaking like a leaf. Whoever sent that message is right. I _don't _deserve her. But I can't live without her.

What if whoever sent me the picture has sent it to her as well? It looks bad. Bella would leave me, quite rightly. I am on borrowed time.

I can't see Bella but I can hear her upstairs. Before I go to see her, I quickly find the bottle of Scotch, pour myself a couple of fingers and down it in one, and then rinse my mouth out with water.

"Bella?" I call up the stairs.

She runs out from one of the spare rooms to the landing.

"Hey! Back so soon?"

She looks ethereally beautiful, just dressed in leggings and a sleeveless giant red vest, hair piled on top of her head in a knot.

"Interviews are done." I murmur as I walk up to meet her. I encircle her in my arms and hold her tight.

"You OK?"

"Yeah. I just missed you."

She tangles her hands into my hair and I bury my head in the crook of her neck, inhaling deeply to try to remember what she smells like, and what she feels like. I'm probably going to lose her soon and I can't cope with that thought. Not at all.

-cc-

The rest of the day consists of me trying to hold my worries at bay. I do miserably, and resort to more Scotch, which helps.

In the evening we make our way to Jasper and Alice's house for a party to welcome Jasper back from Canada. Bella looks stunning. She is dressed in really tight black jeans, a loose golden silk blouse with a high-necked collar and chunky black and gold bangles with matching pendant earrings. Her long brown hair is pencil straight and she has tied it in a high ponytail. On her feet are little black flat shoes with gold embroidery.

My first port of call at the party is the waiter with champagne. Alice has totally gone to town for this shindig.

I fall into a conversation with Ben, Jasper and the boys, and when I turn round, Bella has disappeared. I want to go find her but find myself unable to escape without being rude.

We drink. A lot. And then some more.

Things become blurry.

Football. We talk about that.

The boys asking me when Bella and I are getting married.

Kids. Ben wants more. Jas does too.

_Bella's going to leave me._ No, wait. We don't talk about that. I think that.

"I need to see Bella. My Bella!" I tell them.

"Wait, Ed, man..."

"Don't fucking call me Ed!"

Walking through rooms. People in the way. Push them to the side.

Find the kitchen.

Bella standing up. Red-faced.

Skinny black guy holding her arm. How dare he! How dare he touch _my_ Bella! Even if she won't want me when she sees that picture, she's still _MY BELLA!_

"WHAT THE FUCK? GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY FIANCEE! GET OUTTA HERE BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS!"

"Edward, what the hell? That poor boy was helping me get over a coughing fit! That's all!"

"He shouldn't have been touching you! Nobody should be touching you except me!"

"Ah, I was hoping I would find you before Edward did..." It's Jasper.

"To tell me that he's drunk and being a jack-ass?" Bella says. "I gathered."

"I'm not being a jack-ass!" It doesn't quite come out right. "He shouldn't..."

"Don't say another word Edward Anthony Cullen. We are going home. Right now!"

I don't want to go. I want another drink. I want to kick that kid's ass! But Bella's got her Boss face on and I'm not going to win.

"Fine."

We walk home. Well, I walk. She marches. She's pissed. I protected her from that kid. Why's she so mad?

"Thank you, Bella." I say when she pours me a glass of water and gives me two aspirin.

"How could you humiliate me like that, Edward?" She asks. Her eyes are so big that they could be saucers.

"I'm sorry But he had hish hands on you and..." My words aren't coming out right.

"_One_ hand. One hand lightly on my elbow to help me whilst I coughed and spluttered on a bit of chilli. That's all! And if you'd bothered to look before yelling, you'd have seen that that boy was most likely gay."

"Oh." _Shit. Have I got it wrong?_

"I don't believe you sometimes. You get so mad when anyone lays a finger on me, or when you think someone's showing me too much attention, but think it's perfectly OK to put your arms around your ex and not tell me about it!"

Hang on. What did she say?

"Wha'?"

"You never told me that you put your arm around Heidi the other day when you were talking to her, did you?"

"H-How did you know 'bout that?"

"How did I know? Here's how I fucking knew!" She shows me a picture on her phone. The one that was sent to me.

"Gorgeoush, ishnot what looks like! Was just tryin' a... comfort her!"

"Why didn't you tell me? You can't have one set of rules for me and one set of rules for you!"

"I...I..."

"Forget it! I'm going to bed. Don't even think of trying to sleep in the same room as me tonight!"

_Shit. Big stinking shit. She knows. She's pissed. This is it. Over. Over. Over._

How am I supposed to live without her? I can't. I can't!

With shaking hands I pull out the Scotch bottle and finish it. I need more. I need a lot more. Supermarket. I need a 24-hour supermarket or an off-licence. Now.

I head out the door and start walking.

Where's the supermarket? It can't be far. I walk and walk, and then decide I must be going the wrong way so turn off onto the main road.

Suddenly I hear squealing and smell burning rubber.

I'm on the ground.

I can't move.

Shit! It hurts!

There's a van in front of me and a man hovering over me talking on his phone. My head is throbbing. My leg, my tummy, my fucking head! They all hurt!

There are blue lights and men in green suits with stethoscopes. There's a policeman. No, three.

They're asking me questions. I don't know what they're asking me.

"What's your name?"

"Edward. Edward Cullen." I tell them. I know that one.

"You been drinking?"

"Yeah. It hurts."

"I know son. When's your birthday?"

"20th June."

I think I might be dying. There are more policemen. More green suits.

"Bella! I need to see Bella! I love her. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! Bella!" I tell them. They have to find her for me! Even if she doesn't want me anymore, she has to know that she owns my heart.

My head feels strange. My body's tingling. I can't keep my eyes open.

"Edward? Edward? Stay with us, son!"

I try. But something's taking me away.

Pain fading.

"Shit! Edward! Stay with us. Keep your eyes open!"

Pain gone. Blackness takes me.

-cc-

**AN: Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think! **


	24. Chapter 24

**AN: Hello everyone! Another alternate POV here- this time it's Carlisle. I hope you like his thoughts. Please let me know yours!**

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**-cc-**

**Twenty-Four**

**Carlisle**

I'm not used to weekends at home with nothing to do. Esme is in the greenhouse, tending to her beloved plants whilst the American-style blueberry muffins she's making for breakfast are in the oven. It's raining heavily outside so I've had to cancel my golf game with Chris McCarty, my closest friend. Most people would think 8am is early to be up on a Saturday, but I've been a surgeon for over thirty years. I'm usually on the wards, in my scrubs, on rounds at this time.

Those muffins smell delicious. I'm tempted to open the oven door and peek at them but I know from experience that the muffins won't rise as well, and Esme will get in a huff. Instead I wonder to the greenhouse to talk to my wife. She is deadheading some flower plants whilst humming away to the music on the iPod our son Edward and our soon-to-be daughter-in-law Bella got her for her birthday, Fleetwood Mac's 'Rumours', if I'm not mistaken.

I feel a swell of pride as I think of my son. His life seems on track and he seems to have everything he wants in life. A job he loves and a loving, strong, beautiful woman next to him are all Edward has ever wanted, especially the latter. He has always struggled with self-confidence but Bella's love for him and belief in him seems to have helped him enormously with those issues.

"Hello, husband!" She greets me as I walk in. "You haven't disturbed the muffins have you?" She enquires before turning back to the plants.

She is wearing one of my old white shirts tied in a knot at the waist, over a dark green camisole tucked into a pair of three-quarter length faded jeans, which reveal her shapely ankles. Her auburn and caramel coloured hair is kept back from her face with a wide green scarf. We have been married thirty-two years, but the sight of her makes my heart leap and my skin tingle in the same way as when we were first courting.

"Not at all, my darling wife. I learnt my lesson last time!" I reply. She chuckles and turns back to the plants. I can't resist coming up behind her and kissing her neck as I wrap my arms around her waist.

"Oh, Carlisle..." she whispers. "...you shouldn't... not while I'm trying to..." she drops the secateurs and turns round in my arms. "You're a very naughty man, distracting me the way you do..." she presses her lips to mine and parts her mouth invitingly.

We are interrupted by the shrill ringing of the house telephone.

"We could ignore it..." I murmur, running my hands under her shirt.

"We could, but we both know that you're not going to. It could be the hospital."

"I'm off duty..." I grumble, moving my kisses to just under her ear.

"You're the only surgeon that can do urgent liver and pancreatic surgery at that hospital. If they're calling you know you're going to go in, otherwise the patient's going to have to go all the way to Birmingham, and..."

I break away from her with a groan and run to the hallway pick it up.

"Hello?" I say, a little breathlessly.

"_Good morning. Is that Carlisle Cullen_?" A polite female voice with a strong Yorkshire accent asks. I can hear the buzz, beeping, hustle and bustle of a busy operating theatre behind her. _Damn, Esme was right._

"Yes. What's the story?" I ask back, pulling out the notebook and pen I keep in the telephone table drawer to take notes about the patient.

"_Um...sorry?" _For some reason there is hesitation and confusion in her voice.

"Err... you know, what's the patient's presenting complaint, history, vitals, the reason you want me to come in on a Saturday morning when I'm not on duty...?"

"_You're a doctor?"_

"Yes. General and abdominal surgeon? Is that not why you're calling me from what sounds like the operating theatre?" I reply, confused.

"_I am calling from an operating theatre but not from_..." I hear the shuffling of papers. _"...Worcestershire. I'm calling from Leeds General Infirmary. My name is Stephenie. I'm the operating theatres manager on duty here today."_

"Leeds?"

Why am I being called from Leeds? Unless...? _Edward and Bella. God, please don't let anything have happened to them!_

"_Are you the father of Edward Cullen? You're listed as his next of kin on the NHS Spine."_ She says, referring to the national database of patient demographics and records. Edward must not have updated his records recently_. "Date of birth, 20__th__ June..."_

"Yes!" I interrupt. "He lives in Leeds with his fiancée. What's happened?" I asked in a panic.

"_I'm afraid he was brought in with extensive injuries after being hit by a van at around 1am this morning."_

"Oh my God!" I exclaim. Esme hears me and rushes over. "What about his fiancée, Bella? Where is she?" Esme's eyes widen and she grips my arm. I hug her into my side and put the phone on speaker so she can hear.

"_I don't know, sir. Edward was brought in with no identification, no phone, nothing. He was heavily under the influence of alcohol. He was able to tell us his name and he kept asking for Bella, but nothing else. Around an hour after the ambulance arrived, when they were still stabilising him at the scene of the accident, he suddenly lost consciousness."_

"No!" My hands start to tremble.

"_We got him into the CT scanner urgently and it revealed a large, rapidly growing bleed..."_

"...An extradural haemorrhage?" That would be most likely if he was hit by a van and didn't lose consciousness straight away.

"_Yes."_ I immediately think of my friend John Gerandy, who is Professor of Neurosurgery in Leeds and the steadiest hands in the whole country. I pray he was the neurosurgeon on duty_. "He was rushed to surgery straight away..."_

"Was it John Gerandy who operated? He's the best. One of my friends. Please tell me it was..."

"_It was the Professor and his team on duty, yes. He came in straight away and was able to fix the bleed, but Edward also sustained other injuries- a ruptured spleen and a compound fracture of the left femoral shaft, which needed urgent surgery as well. He's only just coming into recovery now."_

"And will he be going into the Intensive Care Unit?"

"_That's right." _Stephenie replied._ "He's still critically unwell, sir. It's probably a good idea to come, if you can, and perhaps you could get in touch with Edward's fiancée. The last thing he said was her name."_

"We'll be there as soon as possible and of course we'll call Bella. Thank you."

"_You're welcome, sir. I'm sorry to have to be the bearer of bad news."_

"It's OK. I know from experience that it's the worst part of working in healthcare."

"_Indeed. Safe journey, sir."_

"Thanks again. Bye."

"_Bye."_ I hear Stephenie take a deep breath and then hang up.

I turn to Esme, who has tears running down her face. I hug her tightly.

"Carlisle, our son! Our only son! He has to be OK! He has to!" She sobs into my chest.

"Shh... we have to be strong, my darling. And we have to have faith." I reply, trying to find my inner stoicism. Esme's right, though. Edward has to be all right. He is our reason for existing. All our achievements and all our possessions mean nothing without the health and happiness of our son, and now our soon-to-be new daughter, the angelic Bella. Like Esme and I, they are symbiotic. If we lose Edward, we will lose her too.

-cc-


	25. Chapter 25

**Twenty-five**

Everything hurts.

Everything feels heavy.

Everything sounds fuzzy.

Everything smells funny.

I can't move. Why can't I move? Why can't I open my eyes? Why do I feel so goddamn tired?

Is there something in my throat? Why does it feel like I'm not in control of my breathing?

Most importantly, where is Bella?

Tired...sleepy...Bella?

Don't want to sleep...Bella...

-cc-

The fuzziness is lifting. I can hear voices and buzzing. Nothing that sounds like Bella. My throat doesn't feel as lumpy. I take a deep breath and my lungs seem to respond like they're supposed to.

Someone is calling my name. It's not Bella. It's a man's voice, but it sounds friendly. With a huge amount of effort, I manage to flicker my eyes open.

A young guy in his 20s dressed in scrubs is looking at me, surprise all over his face. I manage to look up and around before I have to close my eyes again. _Shit. I'm in hospital. What happened? _

I manage to open my eyes again.

"Edward, my name is David. I'm your nurse. You're in hospital. You were hit by a van." He says.

Where the hell is Bella? Was she hurt too?

I close my eyes again and try to focus on getting my voice to work. I try a couple of times and it doesn't work. Frustrated, I take a deep breath and try once again.

"Bella." I manage to say. Nurse David's eyes widen. Damn. It hurts so much to talk. My jaw doesn't feel like it's moving right.

"Edward, you're talking. That's great!"

Nurse David, that's not the point.

"Bella." I manage to say her name again.

"She's coming. She'll be here in just a couple of hours. She'll be delighted to hear your voice!"

I manage to smile a little but the effort of just opening my eyes and saying a couple of words sends waves of exhaustion over me. My eyes close again and I can't stop them.

-cc-

"Edward? Edward?" I am vaguely aware of someone moving my shoulder around. _Don't do that! It fucking hurts!_

I open my eyes, slightly annoyed and in pain. I'm not really interested in anything except seeing Bella again.

"Bella?" I say her name. It is so painful. My throat is burning.

What I hear next is the sweetest music. It is my Bella's gasp. I have heard it in so many different contexts. I would recognise it anywhere.

"Edward! Edward! Handsome, it's me! Bella!"

I look towards the sound of her beautiful voice. My darling girl is stood to my side, and she clutches my hand. Warmth shoots up my arm and my skin tingles that familiar tingle that I always feel when Bella is near.

"Bella." I say again. I want to say more, but it hurts too much. I manage to pull my mouth into what I hope is a smile and not a grimace as I take in Bella's big chocolate eyes. She looks tired, but nevertheless, she is a glorious sight.

"I'm here Baby. I'm here." She tells me as she holds my hand tighter.

"Bella." I manage to repeat.

"Edward. Oh, Baby. I'm sorry. I love you. I'm so sorry." _What's she sorry for? She's not done anything wrong._ I try to remember the last time I saw her. I get some flashbacks. Bella wearing a party dress. A mobile phone. Whisky bottle. Alice and Jasper. A road. Nothing that makes much sense to me at this moment in time.

Bella leans towards me and I smell her wondrous strawberry and freesia scent. She kisses my lips, which feel a bit like sandpaper, and then kisses me on my forehead. She is wearing the rose lip stuff that makes her lips even more kissable. Suddenly I remember something. Bella spreading the stuff on my lips and kissing me. When was that?

"I've missed you. So so much." She tells me. I try to say something back but the tiredness overwhelms me again. I feel myself slipping away into slumber all over again despite my efforts to resist.

"Edward? Edward?" I hear Bella say as my eyes close. _I'll be back again soon, my love. I hope._

-cc-

Every time I open my eyes, I am greeted by the welcome faces of one or more of my family. My mother, my father, Bella and Emmett all seem to be taking it in turns to spend time by my side. I have no concept of time right now because I can't see any sunlight, just the bright artificial lights of the hospital ward. Eventually though, David turns down the lights above my head and I wonder if it is the end of the day. I close my eyes again but open them again when I hear my favourite sound in the world.

"Edward, Baby?"

"Bella." I say. I think it's getting slightly easier. "Bella." I say again, and I pull my mouth into a smile too. That hurts the most.

"Hey." She kisses me softly. "It's getting late and we're going to have to go soon to let you get some rest." _No! Don't go! No! I love you!_ "I'm sorry, Handsome. But I'll be back as soon as they let me back in tomorrow." I want to tell her that I love her but it's still so hard to get my mouth to do what I want it to do.

"Bella."

"What is it, Baby?" She looks very concerned as she waits to see if I will say anything else. _I'm trying, Gorgeous._

Bella rubs my lips with the rose stuff and then rubs hers.

"Bella." She picks up my hand and holds it tightly, and then pierces me with those dark, intense eyes that have captivated me for over nine years. I need her to know that I love her. That she is my reason for fighting to stay alive, for fighting against all the pain and blurriness. Somehow I manage to find the energy and strength within me and manage to croak out, "Love you."

I watch my fiancée's face as her eyes well up and one lonely tear spills down her peachy, creamy cheek.

"Edward, I love you too! So much. You're going to get better and then we're going to get married and we're going to be happier than we've ever dreamed, Handsome." She exclaimed. I manage to smile a really big smile at her words. _That's all I want in the world, my darling Gorgeous Bella. That's all I want._

"Love Bella. Love you." I manage before the tiredness claims me once more.

-cc-

**AN: I cried when I wrote this. **


	26. Chapter 26

**Hi everyone! I've been later in finishing up this companion piece than I expected, thanks to real life things and the creative vibes flowing for my other story 'Just One Night.' Sorry if you've been waiting ages for this update! **

**There will be two chapters tonight, and then I'm hoping to get the final three out in another two weeks. **

**I don't own the Twilight Saga and its awesome characters. I just own an overworked brain. **

**-cc-**

**Twenty-Six**

It gets easier. I manage to stay awake for longer and I manage a few more words. But my jaw is totally messed up and the pain is excruciating when I try to laugh or form sentences. Thankfully, a couple of days they move me to a different ward, the doctors deem me strong enough to have jaw surgery. I'm out for a good few hours but when I wake up and they ask me to say something, it's much easier to tell them that I want to see my Bella.

My memories from that night have, in the main, returned. Along with them has come a renewed sense of shame and guilt. My stupidity at not telling Bella exactly what transpired between me and Heidi from the beginning, and again when I got sent that photo. My overreaction, my jealousy and possessiveness, which caused Bella to get so angry with me. The drink, especially the fact that I've been finding it harder and harder to get through a day without it. Walking in front of a van in my drunken state... all my fault.

I practise speaking as much as I can because I want to be able to have a conversation with Bella when she arrives. It works very well. Now that my jaw is stable, it hardly hurts when I form words and my muscles aren't fatiguing so easily. The nurse who's been assigned to me tells me that she's impressed. I have to admit I'm less than impressed by the bubblegum pink artificially sweet drink she's insisting I have, and I detest the fact that I'm being fed by a tube from my nose into my stomach. Apparently I can start to have real food this evening but it has to be mashed or pureed, and the feeding tube has to stay put for a while longer. Yuck.

The day after my jaw surgery, I am greeted by the most beautiful sight. My amazing fiancée. At least I hope she's still my fiancée. I wouldn't blame her if she has decided to leave.

"Bella!" The nurse tactfully gives Bella the cup she is helping me drink from and disappears.

"Hello Baby."

"I've missed you Gorgeous." I tell her. She looks up from the kiss she has bestowed upon my lips. Her eyes become massive and she breaks into an entrancing smile.

"Oh, Edward! You're talking so much better! I've missed you so much."

"It's easier for me to form the words now and it hurts much less now my jaw's fixed." My mouth goes dry and I make for a sip of the drink, even though it's gross. "I'm so sorry, my love."

"Sorry for what, Handsome?"

"Putting you through hell. Heidi. Being so drunk."

"It was an accident, Baby. And the Heidi thing- don't even worry about it. I should never have thrown it in your face like that. I should never have questioned your love for me. I love you and I'm so sorry. Words can't express how sorry I am." She tells me, bringing her hot little hand to my forehead.

"But if I hadn't got so drunk..."

"If I hadn't shut you out of our bedroom..."

"But..."

It's all too much. I nearly died. I nearly lost Bella and our future together, and for what? A grainy photo which suggests that I have been unfaithful when I haven't, my ridiculous jealousy and a couple of bottles of whisky. Seeing her beautiful face and feeling the depth of love and care she is showing me right now, I let go and cry like a baby.

"Oh Edward!" She cries. She cups my face and moves close so our foreheads are rubbing. She bursts into tears too.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I'm so sorry!"

"No, I'm sorry. That night I was angry and hurt and embarrassed and..." _She thinks it's her fault?_

"Not your fault. Not you. Not that."

"Then who? What? Why?" I stay silent and try to move away. I don't want her to go through my stress, but she isn't having any of it. "Edward?"

"Bella, it was the booze. I shouldn't have drunk so much." I tell her.

"Why did you drink so much? What upset you so much?"

"Nothing." I try to say, but she knows me far too well. I can rarely lie to her convincingly.

"Bullshit." Bella is going to interrogate me until I give up the goods so I try avoidance instead of lying.

"Bella...I can't..."

"Edward. I nearly lost you. I nearly lost everything that means anything. Please tell me _why!"_

"You aren't going to let this go, are you?" Stupid question. She never misses a trick.

"What do you think?" I try to ease my discomfort by running my hand into my hair but I can't do that because of all the wires to which I'm attached. Bella sees what I'm trying to do and does it for me, yet another token of her love.

The nurse chooses this moment to come back into the room.

"Everything OK? Edward, your heart rate is going like the clappers on the monitors." I don't like the way she looks accusingly at Bella. "You need to keep stress to a minimum to have the best chance of recovery."

"Everything's fine Nurse." I tell her. Suddenly the tiredness that has so far eluded me catches me up and I find it hard to stay sitting.

"OK. Visiting hours are nearly over by the way." The nurse says before leaving.

"Edward, I'm going to let you get some rest, OK, Baby?" _No! Don't leave me!_

"No, don't go! I'm sorry. It's just so difficult to explain."

`"I have to, Handsome. Visiting hours are over. Just answer me one thing." I nod warily. "Do you... did you ..." she grips the bedrail tightly and lets out a long breath "...walk in front of that van on purpose?" _What the hell? No way!_

"No! As long as you love and want me, my life is worth living."

"Edward. I'm not going anywhere. I will love you forever. I'll want you forever. Until my heart stops beating."

"That's all I want in the world, Bella, my love."

She kisses me soundly and my whole soul calms.

"You need to talk about what drove you to drink so much, what makes you so hard and unforgiving towards yourself. If you can't talk about it with me or your parents, then perhaps you could talk to a professional?"

"I don't know..." _She wants me to see a shrink?_

"Your demons and insecurities have dominated your life for fourteen years. You deserve to be happy Ed..." What the fuck? SHE KNOWS ABOUT THE MOTORBIKE ACCIDENT? FUCK! "What?" She asks, taking in my shocked face.

"You said 'fourteen years.' You know. My mother's been talking."

"Yes."

"How?"

"You told me about it first, remember?" I remember mentioning it to her at one of my birthday parties, the one where Jess showed up with Mike and I freaked out. "Esme and I couldn't sleep. It was when you were still ventilated. I made reference to the motorbike accident and she thought I knew all the details. Suddenly so many things made sense."

"D-did she tell you about C-Cambridge?" I choke out, both from mortification and tiredness.

"Yes. And I told her about how I spent eight years wishing that I'd gone to Leeds and met you then, and enjoyed myself at uni in the process. Because as great an opportunity as Cambridge was, it was constant stress for three years, and I don't think it was worth it."

"Really? You spent eight years wishing you went to Leeds?" It is her turn to nod. She'd alluded to the fact that she found Cambridge stressful before but I hadn't realised she'd wished she'd went to Leeds. "Well then I definitely I should have told you myself." I manage to grin although my jaw hurts.

"Maybe you should have told me but it doesn't matter now." She says. "Do you believe in fate?" She asks mysteriously.

"I don't know. Possibly." I reply, wrecked with exhaustion but keen to know her train of thought. Bella's always been quite analytical, wanting to know the evidence before believing anything that sounds weird. I wouldn't have taken her to be a believer in fate.

"I don't really, but if I did, I would say that you and me, we were meant to be together, and meant to come together when we did."

"But you don't believe in fate?"

"No. But I believe in us." A perfect answer from my perfect girl. I would do anything for her, and if she thinks it will help, then...

"Bella?" I say, as she moves to leave. She turns round. "I'll do it. I'll talk to a professional, a psychiatrist or a therapist or something. But only if you're there too."

"Of course Handsome."

She kisses me one last time and departs. It is only after she goes that the panic and worry sets in. What is the professional going to make of me?

-cc-


	27. Chapter 27

**Hi! Here's the second of two chapters that I'm posting tonight! Sorry for the delay! **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**-cc-**

**Twenty-Seven**

Home is wherever Bella is.

Thankfully Bella is currently in our house, as am I. _Our beautiful home._

I cannot explain just how happy I am to be here, to be alive and to be with my love.

My limbs, head and organs are healing well, as is my psyche. Speaking to the psychiatrist was immensely cathartic, and it's amazing how much better the two of us feel without alcohol in our lives.

We are getting married in less than two months in Rome. _Finally. _

I am returning to work tomorrow. Bella wanted me to take another week off but I know that I need to get back to my routine, although it will be a strain. Yet, I feel like my brain will rot if I stay at home doing nothing.

I spend the morning doing some exercises our new physiotherapist and trainer Colin has showed me, in order to build up my weakened muscles. I am still taking a huge array of medications, vitamins and protein supplements but I feel better every day. I'm getting a good cardiovascular workout each day because Bella and I can't keep our hands off each other. We are limited in positions thanks to my healing leg and collarbone but it doesn't stop us. It's mid-afternoon and we've already done it three times. It takes the energy out of me, however and Bella sends me up to our room for a nap while she does little bits and pieces around the house.

I fall asleep for a while- I'm not sure how long- but am woken by Bella gently shaking me awake. _Woo-hoo! Time for Round Four!_

"Bella." I blink my eyes a few times to wake up a bit more. The pain medication makes me sleepy. "Hey, Gorgeous." I pull her into my arms and kiss her. I feel her relax into my arms and kiss me back.

"Edward..." she moans as I kiss and suck at her elegant throat, and move my hands towards her perfect ass. Suddenly she goes stiff. "No, no, stop, stop!"

"What's wrong love?" I sit bolt upright. _Did I hurt her? _"What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything Baby. It's just that Garrett's sitting downstairs asking to see you, looking broken. He cried when I asked where Kate was and begged to see you."

Garrett? What's he doing all the way up here in Leeds?

"Oh. OK. Shit. I'll just go to the loo and be down in a minute." I kiss her once more and reach for the crutches. After sorting myself out, I hobble downstairs. I can't wait to get rid of these shitty crutches and get back to normal.

Garrett is sitting at the kitchen counter when I enter, cradling a mug of tea. He looks terrible, probably as bad as I do.

"Garrett...what...?" I don't get to finish my sentence as Garrett comes over and engulfs me in a hug. He's holding on like a limpet, shaking and crying a little.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't know what she did." _Huh?_

"Garrett, what's going on? What do you mean?" Bella comes up to us and gently breaks up his clinging hold on me, and we all go to sit on the sofa in the corner of our warm kitchen.

"Kate. She tried to split you two up. Bella, she sent you a photo of Edward with his arm around Heidi, didn't she?" Bella nods. "And she sent it to you too, right?" He asks, turning to me. I also agree. "She wanted to hurt you both. She knew that you were letting Heidi down gently that day and yet she told Bella that you had cheated, and then played on your insecurities Edward. She was the reason you got wasted that night. If she hadn't done that..." He starts crying. She wanted to hurt us deliberately. Deep down, I knew this but it is still painful to hear.

"H-how do you know?"

"I bumped into Rosalie at work. She told me what happened. I went home and confronted Kate, who spewed this ridiculous vitriol about how you both were the reason she didn't get a VDI sponsorship and ruined her life."

"What did she mean? Neither of us ever did anything to prevent her from getting a sponsorship. I didn't even know she'd applied." Bella says.

"She wasn't especially forthcoming for the reasons. She said that she'd heard you talking about her interview and knew she'd never match your achievements. She said that Edward ignored then snubbed her and that those two events meant she had every right to keep you apart for so many years as payback and was pissed that you got together despite her efforts."

"She kept us apart deliberately?" Bella asks. She's getting quite upset.

"She wouldn't go into details, but yes. She saw all her actions as justifiable revenge."

"What happened next?" I ask, trying not to let my anger and stress overcome me.

"I walked out, taking Carter with me. I haven't been home since. I took some time off work and came to stay with my parents in Nottingham." Garrett tells us. "I don't know what to do. I thought I loved her, but I don't recognise her anymore. She used to be this energetic, lively, passionate person but she changed. Clothes, going out for lunch and designer baby gear for Carter are all she can muster any interest for."

"How is Carter?" I enquire, thinking of the love in Garrett's face the last time we spoke of him. "When I saw you in London, you were seeing a paediatrician about him." For the first time, Garrett's eyes show a spark.

"He's better. He's been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis and since the doctor put him on nutritional supplements and showed us how to clear his lungs using physiotherapy, he's gaining weight and his breathing is easier."

"How has Kate handled him being diagnosed?"

"Not well, not well at all. She blamed me at first until the doctor pointed out that the gene comes from both parents." He rubbed his face. He really needed some sleep. "Then she kept palming him off on her parents. She could barely look at him. He kept screaming for her and she practically ignored him."

"Does she know you've got him?" Bella asks.

"Yes. She watched me leave. She sat there impassively whilst I gathered his things. I asked her to show some emotion, told her that I was willing to work on our relationship if she came here with me to apologise to you guys and acknowledge that she was wrong, but she said no."

"Garrett, we don't want to be the reason for your marriage breaking up."

"You're not, Bella. What she did to you guys was the icing on the cake. Things have been going down the pan for a long time. I just needed to see that you were both OK after what she did."

"We are, thankfully. I'm feeling better every day and Bella and I have set the date for our wedding. August 13th in Rome." I tell him, trying to reassure him.

"That's great guys."

"Kate's text might have been the trigger for me drinking so much more than I usually do, but she didn't drive the van that knocked me over. " I continue, and my hand automatically seeks out Bella's I need him to know that there were a lot of things that contributed to the accident, my alcohol problem most of all. "She didn't make me cross a road drunkenly in the middle of the night." The thing is, Garrett... I-I have a drinking problem."

"What?"

"I've been drinking more over the past few months, and it got to the point where I was drinking several Scotch whiskeys a night, always thinking about my next drink. It was only a matter of time before I did something really stupid."

"Jesus Edward! I had no idea!"

"Neither did we, until the accident. Needless to say, I've decided to become teetotal."

"So have I. My drinking habits weren't that healthy either and we've decided that we don't need it in our life." Bella adds. "We're back on track."

"So what's next for you?" I ask my old friend.

"I've got a meeting on Thursday with Liam Ireland to discuss the job offer he made me a few months ago. He's still interested in having me work for the Industry Division. If he is, then I'm going to ask if he'll let me start earlier than January. Until then, I'm going to spend time with Carter and talk to a family lawyer. If it comes to divorce, then I'm petitioning for full custody. My parents are prepared to move to Leeds to help out with childcare if Liam takes me on board."

"What about if you manage to work things out with Kate?" Would you stay in London?" Bella asks.

"No. Not if Liam offers me a job. It could be years before Eleazar promotes me. Liam was offering a six-figure salary and numerous benefits when he made me the offer before. Leeds has an award-winning cystic fibrosis centre. My father's from Yorkshire. I always wanted to move this way but didn't for Kate's sake. Now she needs to compromise in order for things to work out for us."

"I'm so sorry it's come to this, Garrett. You know that if we can help in any way..." I begin.

"Thanks Edward. Just seeing you has helped enormously. You might get the odd phone call when the stress gets to me, and if Liam does take me on, then I might need your help getting into life in Leeds."

"Well, you know where we are and feel free to visit anytime."

"You guys are great. I'm so sorr..."

"Garrett, there's no need to keep apologising. You didn't do anything wrong. Would you like to stay for dinner?" Bella offers. She always cooks enough for an army.

"I'd love to but I need to get back to Carter."

"Another time then."

"Of course." He finishes his mug of tea and we show him out.

As soon as the door shuts, I gather Bella into my arms and let her cry out the tears I know she has been holding at bay. _My stoic love._

"Shh...shhh...Bella, it's OK."

"She deliberately kept us apart, Edward. It was one thing for her idle gossip to prevent us getting together but quite another for her to do it intentionally."

"I know love, but we're together now. We're seven weeks away from being married, Gorgeous. And she can't break us. Nothing can ever break our love."

I mean it. Bella and I have been through so much to be together, from our own stupidity, to Kate's meddling, to bad timing, to alcohol and big bad vans. The rest of the world may crumble around us and people may say what they like, but I know that as long as we believe in each other, we can get through anything. Our two hearts beat as one.

-cc-


	28. Chapter 28

**AN: Hello all! Sorry for the long wait. I've been a bit distracted by my other story, Just One Night. I have now finished this companion piece though, and so I'm publishing all three chapters tonight. **

'**The Tide is High' was nominated for Fic of the Week at the Lemonade Stand. If you're having a look at this awesome fic site and feel like voting for it, I'd be very grateful! **

**Thank you all so much for reading. **

**As ever, I do not own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**Twenty-Eight**

"It's not too late to back out, 'Dward! You can still run away!" Emmett snickers, jokingly, while I nervously shift my weight from foot to foot.

We are in the Complesso Vignola Mattei in Rome. It's 13th August, a day that will forever remain ingrained in my mind as the happiest day of my life because today is the day that I finally get to marry my Bella. So no, Emmett, I'm not going to be running anywhere.

Bella wanted a low fuss, small wedding. She was determined not to spend more than a few hours planning it. Once I suggested that we could get married within a couple of months, she took it literally and managed to organise the whole thing, including her dress, the suits Emmett and I are wearing and the flowers, in just one day. Alice helped her with finishing touches, although I think there were moments when Bella wished she'd not asked her, as Alice wanted to make things more intricate and complicated than my darling future wife wanted.

When the time comes and Bella enters the room, everything and everyone fades to black. She is a vision in a simple ivory knee length dress and a navy blue lace jacket- my favourite colour on her. The love I feel for her bubbles up through me and I can't keep the smile off my face as we go through our vows. When we are finally pronounced husband and wife, I reach for her, meaning to kiss her tenderly, and she practically jumps into my arms, throwing her arms around my neck. I can't help but lift her up, and kiss her and kiss her and kiss her. _She's mine. Forever. _

"_Il mio amore, il mio cuore, mia moglie." _I tell her as I place her back on the ground and find her forehead with my lips. _My love, my heart, my wife._

"My love, my heart, my _husband._" She says back.

I am whole now, for the first time ever.

-cc-

Our wedding breakfast is a stunning seven course feast, and even though all our friends and family are becoming tipsy on wine and whisky and Peroni, Bella and I are happily sober. It has been just over ten weeks since that awful night, and my last drink of alcohol. Now that it's out of my system and I'm more secure, I don't miss it. Not at all. And Bella doesn't either. She, like me, is quite content to have ginger ale or Sicilian lemonade.

Halfway through the meal, Emmett announces speeches, and Charlie kicks them off, and makes Bella cry by saying that she made him proud every day of her life. Then it's Emmett's turn. I was worried about what he'd say but I have no need. He is very gentle with his ribbing, and makes a point of telling everyone how glad he is that Bella and I got our shit together. Finally it is my turn, and I simply tell her how much I love her and promise to look after her and our children until my dying day. I make a point of looking at Charlie. He has given me his daughter's hand and I mean to cherish and look after her and his grandchildren forever. When I am done, I raise a toast to my beautiful bride.

"So I'd like to raise a toast to my beautiful bride, Bella Marie _Cullen..." _My flow is interrupted by cheering. "I love you so much." Everyone gets to their feet and raises their glasses. I lean down to kiss her and then we all sit down.

Bella then does the most surprising thing. She stands up.

"Bella, love?" She smiles at me and kisses our joined hands before addressing our friends and family.

"Um, hi, everyone. I know it's not traditional for the bride to make a speech, but very little about the two of us is traditional! So please, indulge me a minute." The room is quiet._ What's going on?_

"Edward, words can't describe how happy I am to have you as my husband. I never thought I was even the marrying kind until you swept into Hong Kong determined to make me yours. Even when we were both with other people, I used to imagine what it would be like to have you as my husband instead, and I know the reality will be even better."

"Bella..." My wife is spectacular. A goddess.

"Now that dream has been realised, I've got new daydreams. But I'll come back to those later. Because right now, I have a confession to make..."

"A confession?" I say, confused. "Should I be worried?" Everyone giggles.

"When you were desperately ill after the accident, I couldn't sleep without you next to me. I tossed and turned and was exhausted. One night, the night you first woke up and told me you loved me, I ended up looking for a t-shirt of yours in your suitcase. Something that smelled of you. I found one, and I also found something else. A box of letters, all addressed to me, mostly written when you were in Malawi."

_She found them? Oh, man! Am I up shit creek? Where's a paddle when you need one?_

"Oh crap..." She pierces me with her intense gaze; her eyes are watering. I can feel tears pricking at the back of mine too.

"My confession is that I read them. All of them. Several times. After I did I fell asleep for the first time in days, because doing so restored my faith in our happily ever after."

She starts to cry, and so do I. I stand up and kiss her and wipe our tears away. They are tears of joy and relief, but they're just a bit messy.

"Oh, my love..."

"Wait! I'm not done!" She exclaims. "Alice, please could you pass me the handbag you insisted I have. Thank you for that, by the way. It's lovely." Alice passes her a navy purse. Bella opens it and pulls out a small package and a piece of paper. Blue notepaper.

"I said that I'd come back to my new daydreams. Well, it seems that they're similar to Edward's. I'd just like to read everyone a part of one of those letters he wrote to me from Malawi." She then starts to read in her lilting, melodic voice.

"_...I imagine what our children would look like frequently. I imagine a little girl with your long wavy dark brown hair and green eyes. I imagine a little boy with warm brown eyes and dark auburn hair like mine. I imagine them running round in our garden, riding bikes and playing football. I imagine sitting at the kitchen table decorating cupcakes with them, painting pictures and reading them stories, you right next to me. With you as a mother, our children would be the brightest academically and the most strikingly beautiful in the world..."_

"Oh my God..." _She wants kids. So do I. She doesn't want to wait? _

"I can't wait for those daydreams to become reality, Baby." She gives me the little package. It is soft. It feels like cloth. "This is for you. Open it."

I look at her before glancing around the room, and then carefully open the paper. Inside is a small black t-shirt. It's doll-size. On it, is written in white letters:

_I love my daddy_

_J'aime mon papa_

_Amo mi papi_

_Amo il mio papa_

_Ich liebe meinen Papa_

_Я люблю своего папу_

"Bella! Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?" I practically yell. _I'm about to be a daddy?_

"I'm telling you that those daydreams we share are going to become reality in about 7 and a half months, Handsome." She replies. _I am! I am going to be a daddy!_

"You're pregnant?"

"I'm pregnant." I can't help but just stare at her. She looks like my Bella, but she's my Bella, full of baby. My baby. When it sinks in, I close the distance between us and take her into my arms.

"I didn't think it was possible to get any happier than I was five minutes ago. I was wrong."

"Phew! So I'm forgiven about the letters?"

"Nothing to forgive. They're yours. Everything I have is yours, my love." I caress her tummy with my hand."Yours and our baby's."

"You're going to be the best father in the world, Mr Cullen." She tells me. _I'm going to be. I have to be._

"And you're going to be the best mother in the world, Mrs Cullen." I reply. Of that I'm certain.

-cc-


	29. Chapter 29

**AN: The second of three (yes, three!) chapters tonight. This one is set three months before the main chapter in 'The Tide is High.' **

**Thank you for reading. **

**I don't own Twilight. I wish I did! **

**Twenty-Nine**

Our beautiful son Joseph Masen Cullen, who we call Joey, has been a bundle of joy since the moment he arrived. Bella has taken to motherhood better than ducks take to water, and I like to think I'm doing a decent job as his father. My therapist, Dr Hammond, has been helping me deal with my insecurities, and she remarks, quite often, that she has noticed that my confidence is better since our Joey came along. We're nearly coming to the end of my therapy programme, and I will be forever indebted to her for showing me that I am worthy of Bella's love and has taught me how to take credit for my achievements, that it's all right to feel proud of myself and feel entitled to the good things I have.

Joey is a year old today. We're holding a massive birthday party at our house. Bella and my mother have been doing the food. My father and I have been doing the decorations, including thousands of balloons and streamers. My parents have been living in Leeds for around eight months, since Carlisle was headhunted by Professor Gerandy into a teaching post at Leeds Medical School. That's right. Carlisle is now Professor Cullen. My mother sold her events business for a massive profit, and they bought a house down the road.

We are expecting a lot of people to Joey's party. He has a better social circle than we do! Peter and Charlotte, Bella's brother and his wife, are flying in from Rome with their children Gianna and Anthony, who are five and nearly two. Bella's parents are coming up from Southampton. Alice and Jasper are bringing Jackson who is also nearly two. Alice is around five months' pregnant with their second child. Angela and Ben are bringing along their twins Alex and Jared, who are five, and their newborn youngest Patrick, little Pad. We have also invited Garrett, his parents Diane and Bill, and of course, little Carter, who is not quite three. Add to that our neighbours and their kids and the friends we made in Bella's antenatal class and their kids and by three o'clock in the afternoon, the house is heaving with people.

Noticeable by their absence are Siobhan and Liam. They did say that they were coming, and I start to worry, but Bella is unfazed.

"To be honest, I'm not surprised, Baby." She says as she pulls out another tray of tiny star-shaped sandwiches and vegetable sticks from the fridge to refresh the kids' buffet. "Kids parties are hell on earth to adults without them. Either they're broody and upset because they don't have them, or they're freaked out by the noise, the clutter and the mess, and can't wait to get back to their serene child-free normality." As always, Bella has a point. Our house is utter chaos right now; there are thirty or more kids running around the place leaving chocolate- at least I hope it's chocolate- handprints on the walls and on the furniture, crying, screaming or laughing maniacally, all high on sugar.

Bella asks me to bring out more drinks and I am just piling them into the cooler when the back door bell rings.

"Hello young one! Sorry we're late!" Siobhan waltzes in, followed by Liam who has his arms full of gift-wrapped boxes.

"No problem. Everything all right?" I ask. I can feel my eyes widening at the sight of so many presents. "Those aren't all for Joey are they?" We have loads of presents as it is. He's so spoilt, is our boy!

"Just this one!" Liam shakes a box wrapped in bright multi-coloured striped paper, topped with a green bow. "The others are for the proud mummy and daddy!"

"What? You didn't need to get us anything! A one year old kid's birthday party isn't the sort of party that requires a host gift!"

Siobhan and Liam smirk at each other.

"That's not what the gifts are for! We have some news actually... we'll tell you after the party."

"Tell us what?" Bella walks in with another empty tray in one hand, holding Joey on her hip. She hands him to me and hands me one of his bottles, filled with watered-down apple juice. Bella then ambles over to Siobhan and Liam and greets them by kissing them on their cheeks. "Everything all right?"

"Yes. Very all right. Are you sure you don't want us to tell you later?"

"No, best tell us now whilst Joey's being quiet, before we cut the cake and open the presents."

"OK. Open this." Siobhan and Liam hand Bella a large flat box. Curious, Bella tears the gold paper, gasping as she does. It is a large document in a frame. She holds it up to show me.

"Edward! Look!"

"Holy sh...sugar!" I have to refrain from swearing in front of Joey, who is just learning to talk. In just a few weeks he has gone from saying just 'Ma' and 'Da-da' to saying at least ten words including 'Uppa', 'Dwink', and 'Yum.'

Bella is beaming as she holds up a framed certificate from the International Law Association.

_International Law Association_

_Positive Practice Award_

_Isabella Swan-Cullen_

_Volturi, Denali and Ireland_

_Industry Division_

My wife has won the ILA's Positive Practice Award. Pride shoots through me. It is one of the highest honours that can be bestowed upon international corporate lawyers like us.

"I don't understand. I never put myself forward for this. Did you nominate me or something?" Bella asks.

"No need. The ILA have their finger on the pulse when it comes to who's making waves, and you, Bella dear, definitely made waves this year when you rescued the packaging companies' merger from the brink of disaster." Liam explains.

"Bella, love, I'm so proud of you!" I lean forward to kiss her smiling face.

"Mama! Mwah!" Joey cries, kissing his palm and then throwing it her way. It's so unbelievably cute. Bella giggles and lifts him from me, then dances around with him in her arms.

"Glad you're proud of me too, kiddo!"

"Now, Edward, this is for you." Siobhan says and hands me a large box that smells of vanilla and chocolate. I open the large bow and rip the gold paper. It is a massive box of mixed chocolate truffles from Hotel Chocolat, my favourite chocolate shop. I've become quite the chocoholic since giving up alcohol.

"Wow! My favourite! Why? What's the occasion?"

"This. First semester results for VDI Law School." She hands me an envelope. I have been waiting for these. They were supposed to be out on Monday. I tear it open excitedly.

A quick survey shows that they are simply outstanding.

"They're brilliant!" I cry. Student satisfaction, tutor satisfaction, student exam results, spending, profit, they'll all better than we predicted.

"Of course they are!" Bella tells me, kissing me gently. "I wouldn't have expected anything less. My turn to be proud of you, baby!"

"There's more. Both of you have been sent invitations to present at this year's ILA conference. Bella, they want you to give a keynote speech. Edward they want you to run a seminar in the Academic Law forum about legal education and social media."

Bella's face falls.

"I don't know... both of us? We couldn't leave Joey for a whole week."

"Bella, it may say 'invitation' on the paperwork, but it's expected that you will do it. It won't look good to turn down the ILA when they've given you a Positive Practice Award for your dedication. It's a real honour."

"I know, Liam, but..." She cuddles Joey, who is twirling a lock of her hair in her fingers, just smiling away, listening to us grown-ups. He does this and then suddenly says a random word that he's heard a few times.

"If it was just one of us, it wouldn't be an issue, but we've never left Joey overnight with my parents before." I say, echoing my Bella's worry. "One of us has always been there with him."

Siobhan and Liam look at each other frustrated. We are at stalemate.

"There you are! Everyone's wondering when we're going to cut the cake!" Esme's voice cuts through the slightly tense atmosphere. "What's going on?"

I quickly explain.

"Don't be silly, Sweeties. Of course you're going to speak at the conference. What an honour! I'm so proud!"

"But Mum...?"

Carlisle and I will come with you. We'll look after Joey during the day and you can still be there for him in the evening."

"Esme, we couldn't ask you to do that..." Bella says.

"Gamma!" Joey reaches out for Esme. 'Gamma' is his word for her, one he's only been using for a week. She cried when he said it the first time.

"Hey little man!" She takes him from Bella. "Bella, you're not asking. We're offering. Besides, I've always wanted to go to 'Frisco!"

"Who said 'Frisco?" Carlisle walks in, chocolate handprint on his grey shirt, carrying a very mucky Anthony. "I've always wanted to go there!"

Siobhan, Liam and my mother all beam at each other.

Well, it looks like the Cullens are heading to San Francisco after all.

-cc-

**One more chapter to go! **


	30. Chapter 30

**AN: The last chapter, and I'm ending with some lemony goodness.**

**I don't own Twilight. Stephenie is one great lady. **

**Thirty**

**Epilogue**

Every cloud has a silver lining.

Today was supposed to be a heavy, sad, dark day.

Aro, my mentor and dear friend, died two weeks ago, and today was his funeral. Afterwards, we trouped into the VDI offices for the reading of his will and a partners' meeting. Neither Bella nor I expected that it would end with us being happier than ever.

As of now, Bella and I are the newest senior partners at the firm. Volturi, Denali, Ireland and _Cullen._ At the age of thirty-nine and forty respectively, Bella and I are the second-youngest junior partners ever to be made senior partners, second only to Carmen Denali, who was thirty-eight when she was appointed.

What makes it all the more poignant is that this was Aro's last wish. I wonder if he knew his time on this Earth was drawing to a close. He left Bella and me antique jewellery to confirm that he wished us to join the firm as senior partners. My heart pangs thinking about it.

Once the meeting is over, we have been through our new contracts with the other senior partners, including details of the firm's name change and how it will be rolled out, Bella and I return to our apartment in Campo de'Fiori. We are not staying very long. We arrived last night and are going back home this evening. We still don't like leaving the kids overnight, especially when it's both of us, but for Aro's memorial and this partners' meeting, we had to make an exception.

Bella turns, looks at me and suddenly, her handbag is on the floor and she is in my arms, her legs around my waist. I cup her ass and hold her close to me as I move us towards some horizontal surface appropriate for our imminent coupling. Her response is to latch her lips to my neck, push my suit jacket off my shoulders and start to pull my shirttails out of my trousers.

"Can't believe it!" She breathes, as we collide with the dining table. "Everything we ever wanted in life, baby."

I bring my arms around my sexy wife and unzip her black linen dress. I then coax her to lie back whilst I peel it away from her. She is wearing simple black lace and cotton underwear.

"I couldn't agree more, Gorgeous. Bella, I love you so much."

"I love you too. Now, husband..." she looks at me with a wicked glint in her eye.

"Yes, wife?" I know what she wants. I drop my trousers and boxer briefs, and lose my shirt and tie.

"You know what to do."

I do. We have been together over ten years, married for nearly nine, and in love for nineteen. We are aligned in perfect harmony.

I push her bra cups down and suck on her large dark pink nipples. I rip her panties off and my fingers skim over her clit before dipping into her hot, wet core.

Bella moans and writhes as I touch her. As she gets more turned on, she pants and whimpers; the sounds she makes turn me on no end. I am hard as a rock for her.

"God, Edward!" She cries. I swap my hands over so I am tweaking her delectable buds, and wrap my lips around her throbbing clit before licking, flicking and sucking her to a swift, trembling climax. As she comes, releasing delicious juices over my face, she cries my name over and over again.

Whilst she catches her breath, I stroke the silky smooth skin of her inner thighs and nuzzle her tummy with my nose, licking and sucking her, for she tastes so delicious.

Bella's body has changed in the past ten years, which is to be expected; she has given birth three times. Instead of being hard and flat, her tummy is soft and slightly rounded, and decorated with light silvery lines. She used to be self-conscious of them, until I worshipped every single one with my lips and told her that I loved them all. I guess I think of them as my mark on her; she wouldn't have them if it wasn't for me impregnating and making our babies with her.

I have changed too. My six-pack is a little less defined, my arms are less muscled. Bella doesn't care. Our love and attraction transcend such details. We have changed together; our chemistry has only grown.

When she has recovered slightly, I rise up, kiss her deeply, and swiftly drive into her hot, welcoming pussy.

"Yes! Edward! Fuck me!"

I know by the look on her face that she means me to drive hard. She smiles as I speed up and give it all I've got. I hold her by the thighs and pound her deep.

"Oh, Bella! My love!" I pant.

"Harder, please! Baby, go deeper!" She beckons me to lean over her and of course I do. She wants to put a hand in my hair and feel the skin on my back under her fingernails as much as I want to feel her tugging and scratching me. It's her way of marking me as hers.

As I move in and out of her, the skin of our chests rubbing against each other, our eyes locking, I feel my pleasure start to crescendo.

"Close, Gorgeous." I warn her. She nips at my bottom lip and I let go of her legs so she can wrap them around me as I speed up. She raises her hands above her head and I hold them there with one of mine as I ride her faster and faster.

I am moments from coming inside my wife. I slip my free hand between us and wiggle my fingers against her clit.

"Edward, go, baby! So good!"

She starts to shudder against me, and as she does, I let go myself and come deep inside her.

"Bella!"

When my last spurt is released, I pull her up to sit on the edge of the dining table and hold her against me. She wraps her arms around my neck and rests the side of her face against my chest. Her legs remain curled around me. She sighs happily. I do the same into her hair.

"Dr Edward Cullen, PhD. Senior Partner at Volturi, Denali, Ireland and Cullen. Head of the Academic Division. Dean of VDI Law School. My handsome husband. Daddy to our three kids." She says, peppering me with small, hot, wet kisses.

"Mrs Isabella Swan-Cullen. Senior Partner at Volturi, Denali, Ireland and Cullen. Head of the Industry Division in the UK and Ireland. Joint Head of the Worldwide Industry Division. Winner of two ILA Positive Practice Awards. The mother of my children, the love of my life, the most beautiful woman in the world." I reply.

Life doesn't get better than this.

_Fin_

-cc-

**I mean it from the bottom of my heart. **

**Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. **

**CC xxx**


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